RG Beefcake and Boyfriends: list

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My 24 favorite autobiographical stories: gay hints, sausage sightings, a wiener, a goblin, the Pentecostal Porn Star, and Kevin the Vampire

I've posted dozens of more-or-less accurate autobiographical stories here and on Tales of West Hollywood, moving from my fundamentalist Nazarene childhood through high school, figuring it out, college, grad school at Indiana University, a horrible year in...ugh...Texas, and on to the heart of the Gay World. Some of the stories are minimal -- I was trying to cover every gay hint, boyfriend, hookup, and sausage sighting -- but some are well-written, insightful, humorous, and occasionally erotic. Here are my 24 favorites.

Childhood

I Fall Asleep in a Sailor's Arms. On the train on the way back from visiting South Carolina. He warns me about making friends with "sissies."

The Face of Pure Evil. The Old Lady Schoolteachers' grandson, who may not have looked like this, rescues me from the Maniac who stalks the hallways of Denkmann Elementary School.

The Answer to the Naked Man's Question. A psychedelic Alice in Wonderland on tv on a golden afternoon, and a naked man who asks a question that I still can't answer.

Comic Books and Cocks at the Furniture Store. Cousin Buster pranks me by claiming that you can get comic books at the furniture store -- and the delivery guys take off their shirts. And sometimes their pants.

Grandpa Prater's Banjo On the day after Christmas, Cousin Buster and I sneak into Grandpa Prater's room to borrow his banjo.

My Wild Night: Pancakes, Massage, and a Wiener. I broke like six of my parents' rules that night, and was grounded for two weeks. But at least I got to feel a...

High School

On My Knees in a Cute Guy's Bedroom. When we went on vacation, we had to go to a local church, where they mistook us for sinners and tried inept soul-winning lines. But once it worked to my advantage: A cute boy invited me to his bedroom "to pray."

The Preacher Pops a Boner. Our Bible College invited prospective students to a weekend of campus tours, ball games, nature hikes, classroom visits -- and the boys' dorm lounge, where the only couch invisible to the monitor got quite busy.

Augustana College

The First Gay Rights March in Iowa. Passersby pull their friends out of stores to gawk. The police watch closely, eager to arrest us if we happen to touch another marcher's hand

I Cheat on My Boyfriend with a Goblin. The Goblin's name is Dale Schafer-Shit. But Fred was cheating with him first. Every friggin' day.

Sharing a Bed with Mary's Brother. My friend Mary invites me to her horrible house in the suburbs for spring break. But at least I get to share a bed with a cute bo.

More after the break

The 18 best Gemstones stories: Kelvin with Percy, Cousin Karl with Vance and Percy, Keefe with Gideon, Pontius with Stacy. Plus Abraham comes out

I never wrote fan fiction before, but I got the urge frequently during the run of The Righteous Gemstones, to "fix" terrible plotlines, expand upon minor characters, and respond to the incessant "that doesn't make Kelvin gay" fan complaints. There are 25 on Archive of Our Own, but I've only reposted 18 here:

Before Season 1

How do I Know If I'm G...: Pontius pressures his older brother, 16-year old Gideon, into coming to his sleepover. He invites the "juvenile delinquent" Manny, gets his first kiss, and wonders if he is g___.

During/After Season 1

My Boyfriend and my Satanist Ex-boyfriend at Thanksgiving Dinner. Kelvin wants them to stay closeted at Thanksgiving Dinner with Keefe's family, but his ex-boyfriend, Daedalus, is coming, too, and wants to get back together.

Is there Sex After Death? Scotty dies in Episode 1.8, but Grandma Aimee-Leigh guides him through all the moments of Gideon's life, so he can forgive him for all the moments lost to pettiness and fear.

Kelvin and Keefe under the Christmas tree. After the events of Season 1, everyone thinks that Kelvin and Keefe are boyfriends -- except for Kelvin.

During/After Season 2

BJ's Angels. I envision Gideon and two members of the God Squad getting jobs as detectives in a Charlie's Angels parody, with BJ as Charlie.

During/After Season 3

Bondage doesn't solve everything. There were several hints in Episodes 1-2 that Kelvin and Keefe were into BDSM, so I wrote a story where they guys break up during a BDSM scene, then reconcile when Kelvin arranges for Keefe to get a job as manager of the Gemstone Health Club.

Kelvin's Rebound Date with Percy. Percy appears in just one scene, as an interior designer working on the church board room. In this story, Kelvin is distraught after the Episode 3.4 breakup, and his siblings suggest that he move on...with a date with Percy.

Gideon Moves out of the Friend Zone. After the Episode 3,4 breakup, Gideon gets the nerve to ask Keefe out. They have a hookup, but is that enough to move out of the friend zone?

The Kiss Heard 'Round the World. The day of the Episode 3.8 Kelvin/Keefe kiss, seen through the eyes of Amber, Gideon, Eli, Judy, Keefe, and Jesse.

More after the break

I usually profile teen idols after they've graduated to adult hunkiness, but sometimes I can't wait: they're playing gay characters, going to Pride events, wearring femme/fabulous outfits, or hugging their boyfriends while still teenagers. Their openness to gay potential gives me hope for a less homophobic future. I won't look for or post n*de photos, of course, but I usually include some adult co-stars to keep things interesting.

1. Taylor Gregory: At 17, the fierce, fabulous Barbie boy had grown up to become a bodybuilder and fundamentalist.

2. Alfie Williams (left), star of 28 Years Later and 28 Years Later: Bone Temple, is 15 as of this writing, but hangs out with a surprising number of gay guys, who call him "one of the girls"

3. Gavin Munn, Abraham on The Righteous Gemstones, is gay in my fan fiction, but brought a girl to his real-life junior prom.

4. Isaac Ordonez (not pictured). The sweet, sensitive, queer-coded Pugsley Addams on Wednesday dates dudes.

5. Alkaio Thiele. The wizard in training on Beyond Waverly Place and Kayden Koshelev (below) used to be an item.

6. Kayden Koshelev (left). Drag boy and nonbinary firetruck, Alkaio's Other Half before their breakup. Not to worry, he's moved on.

7. Recker Eans. The gaydar boy on Beyond Waverly Place drums in gay-friendly videos and sings in a boy band with gay-friendly songs.

8. Bentley Storteboom (not pictured). His name and physique had me fooled. I thought he was 25, and Dutch.

9. Benjamin Pajak (right) played six gay characters before age 15, and sang as Harvey Milk.

More after the break

Just stay down there for a minute, Spock Baby. I'm almost done.

Ever since I was a kid, 99% of my television viewing has consisted of either comedies or science fiction/fantasy. Because if there's no ghosts, zombies, curses, vampires, werewolves, spaceships, or strange new worlds, why bother?

Here are the top gay-positive science fiction/fantasy shows that I've reviewed here, with prominent gay characters or gay subtexts. Usually there are pecs and penises, too.

1. Khemjira: Thai guy falls in love with his shaman. With demons, reincarnation, spirits, several gay couples, and real Thai culture. Everything I like in one intriguing package.

2. Surreal Estate: A real estate agent and his scoobies clear houses of cursed, vituperative spirits. With a gay male couple.

3. True Blood: Vampires come "out of the coffin" in rural Lousiana, along with shapeshifters, werewolves (Joe Manganiello, left), and other paranormals. Many of whom are naked. With several prominent gay characters.

4. Dead Boy Detectives: Dead teenagers, one gay and the other bi, solve afterlife mysteries.

5. Ghosts (American version; I didn't like the British): The mansion is haunted by a gaggle of wacky ghosts, including a very muscular Viking, a hippie, a pantsless 1990s stock broker, and a gay Revolutionary War soldier.

6. School Spirits. This time the ghosts are trapped in the high school, where the gay guy's romance is treated as the exact equal of the hetero-romance.

7. Doctor Who. The 2010-2022 series had a lot of LGBT representation, with gay walk ons and guest stars. including John Barrowman (left) as a pansexual rogue. But I didn't like the 2023-25 series, where they made the Doctor gay, even gave him a momentary boyfriend, only to turn him straight.

8. Solar Opposites. In spite of fans saying "They can't be gay! They're aliens!", the space explorers shipwrecked on Earth developed into a loving couple And check out the strong gay subtext episode with Skyler Gisondo and Kieran Culkin.

9. Ghost Island: An "Are You Afraid of the Dark" miniseries with a gay romance and a lot of fan disputes about "was it a date?"

More after the break. Caution: Explicit.

The Righteous Gemstones was unique in its enthusiastic portrayal of penises in nearly every episode. lus a number of the actors who didn't get a chance to show their stuff on the show have obligingly posted pictures of their inches on the internet. Here are my favorites, some huge, some not, but all a pleasure to watch.

1. Stephen Schneider (left) as Stephen had an affair with Judy Gemstone in Season 3. Her husband BJ burst into his house during a j/o session, and fought him to reclaim his manhood. The actor was offered a prosthetic, but he wanted to perform with his real cock on display. I can see why.

2. Blair Jackson played the boyfriend of Dot Nancy, whom Kelvin Gemstone is trying to draw away from Satan, in Season 1. Off-camera, he has shown us his stuff.

3. Walton Goggins. In our first view of the elderly grifter Baby Billy, he stands up in his bathtub to reveal a cock of superhuman proportions (they actually useed a stand in). It re-appeared so often in Season 4 that even gay male viewers got tired of it.

4. Stephen Dorf, who played the nasty, homophobic, and probably gay megachurch pastor Vance Simkins, goes full frontal in a movie from 2005..

5. Jak Kriskowski appeared in a scene where Pontius enrolls in military school. His scene was cut, but Jak joined the army in real life, and has given us a cute peeking-out-of-his-pants shot.

6, Kelton Dumont, as wild child Pontius Gemstone, was caught schtupping his girlfriend and jumped up and tried to hide it. After a lot of photo manipulation, about all you can see is a bit of the shaft. But I found a few other possibilities.

7. Adam Devine: To our disappointment, Kelvin Gemstone showed his backside quite often, but never his front. Probably to emphasize that he is a bottom, and self-conscious about his small size. In real life, Adam is hung. We've seen it several times in his movies.

8. Cullen Moss as the security guard hot for Gideon's boyfriend Scotty. He goes full frontal in a 2021 movie.

More after the break. Caution: Explicit.

Since we're winding down the recaps of The Righteous Gemstones, I thought I'd post a list of my favorite Gemstone extras and guest stars, guys who appeared in only one or two scenes, but still made a big impression.

And a bigger impression when I checked on their other roles and physique photos.

1. Blair Jackson, the Semen Load Thug. The boyfriend of Dot Nancy, who Kelvin and Keefe are trying to draw away from Satan. Keefe finds a used condom, and when Blair approaches, says "I bet that was his semen load." Modeling and nude photos.

2. Dakare Chatman. A member of Kelvin's youth group, and later the guy who buys Junior's illegal gambling operation. The actor is gay.

3. Jak Kristowski (left). Appears with Pontius when he is sent to the Citadel, a military college in Charleston. Then his scene was cut, but he still showed us his stuff.

3. Braxton Alexander (left). A boy who rejects the teenage Judy. To get even, teenage Jesse pulls down his pants, revealing his butt and cock to the school. And this is a humiliation because....

5. Ian Winningkoff. The teenage Cousin Chuck Montgomery appears in two scenes. I don't remember if he has any lines. Cute but straight.

6. Cullen Moss (left). The security guard who flirts with Scotty, and later is shown reading a muscle magazine. Nude photos from another tv series or movie.

7. Gogo Lomo-David. The probably-gay brother of homophobic rival megachurch pastor Vance Simkins. Gay in real life.

8. The Naked Thugs. Three guys hired by the evil Rev. Seasons to destroy Eli's satellite church. Eli captures them and forces them to run naked through the mall.

More after the break. Caution: Explicit.

I am a strong supporter of the representation of disabled persons in mass media, and dedicated to presenting the aesthetic beauty of visually different faces and physiques. So I've compiled quite a collection of profiles of disabled and visually different guys. Some are gay, some are hung, but all are beautiful. Here are my 16 favorites.

1. Knox Gibson: Australian swimmer, model, "Hunger Games" baddie, disability advocate. With some n*de co-stars and random twinks

2. Ruben Reuter: the wacky drug dealer of "Pushers," "Lord of the Flies" Percy, Channel Four journalist, Short Guy with a d*ck

3.Noah Matthews Matofsky (left): Head Lost Boy, model, disability advocate, Oscar Wilde fan, boyfriend. With bonus n*de Matthews and Captain Hook's hook

4. Jeremy T. Thomas: Baby Billy's son, Dolly Parton's classmate, the creepy kid from "Antlers", is now 18 and ready to show us his stuff

5. Gavin McHugh (left): The gay-vague kid from 9-1-1 is now a teenager, with male friends and risque comments. Bonus Tyler cock and costar butts

6. Kobey Pinnell: Bondi Beach bodybuilder is into shoes, but is he also into dudes?

7. Daniel Bos: "The Brothers Ferox": a bodybuilder, a swimmer, and the Joker's nemesis walk into a gladiator arena. With bonus nude short guys.

8. Finn Kaifur: Icelandic college student studies ballet, takes a polar plunge, shows his stuff. With bonus Pete White and nude model Shaun Ross.

More after the break. Caution: Explicit.

My 16 favorite short guys, from Jack's downlow boyfriend to the hot Pitt doc. With dicks, butts, and exceptional gorgeousness

I like them short, the shorter the better. My boyfriend in West Hollywood was 5'4", and my current partner is 5'3". If you're pushing toward 6'0", I'm not really interested. So I've compiled quite a collection of short guy profiles. Here are the top 16, some old favorites, some new discoveries.