Michael Seater: The "Life with Derek" guy grows up, gets a boyfriend, and displays a Derek dick

 

Born in Toronto in 1987, Michael Seater first appeared on screen in Night of the Living (1997), a short about a guy whose father turns into a zombie.  Two years of minor roles followed, and then Michael hit YTV/Nickelodeon gold with The Zack Files (2000-2002)

What gay teenager  didn't rush home from school to watch yhe dreamy Zack(Robert Clark), and his buds Cam and Spencer (Jake Epstein, Michael) face bizarre paranormal events?  Like shoes that make it impossible to stop running, a cereal that makes him age rapidly, or an overdue library book that turns him into Alice in Wonderland. 

He went on to play paranormal investigator Lucas in Strange Days at Blake Holsey High (2002-2006). Noah Reid, later Patrick's boyfriend/husband on Schitt's Creek, played his best buddy Marshall, and he also had a love/hate relationship with school bully Vaughn (Robert Clark again).  They are sucked into a wormhole, turn invisible, repeat the same day over and over.  In my favorite episode, a chemistry accident sends Marshall through the periodic table: he becomes hydrogen, oxygen, neon, and so on.  Meanwhile, his older brother Grant arrives at the school and turns into sodium.  Marshall has changed into chlorine, so they stabilize as salt. Just go with it.

Left: Robert Clark's brother Daniel.

Next Michael moved into the more traditional teencom Life with Derek (2005-2009): He has a sibling rivalry with his adopted sister Casey (Ashley Leggat) and, in the first season, an intense, passionate, joined-at-the-hip best buddy, Sam (Kit Weyman).  Then it's girls, girls, girls every second of every day.

In Regenesis (2006-2007), Michael plays homeless teenager Owen, who moves in with paranormal investigator David (Peter Outerbridge, left), but ends up mentally damaged after an experimental treatment to cure his drug addiction 

Michael's adult roles have involved fewer subtexts:

18 to Life (2010-2011): newlywed 18-year olds move in with their parents.

The "virgin getting laid" comedy Sin Bin (2012).  

The "virgin getting laid before the world ends comedy" Sadie's Last Days on Earth (2016).

In 10 episodes of Bomb Girls, 2013, set during World War II, Michael's bomb engineer Ivan dates closeted lesbian Betty, then Betty's crush Kate, then Nazi spy Helen.  Then he dies in a bomb factory explosion.  No gay male characters.

In The Wedding Planners, which aired for seven episodes in March-May 2020, Michael and his sisters plan weddings.  It doesn't look like any of them featured same-sex couples.

Most recently Michael played a gay-coded villain on The Murdoch Mysteries.  In 2009, gay student James Gillies and his boyfriend murder a professor in a reflection of the Leopold and Loeb case.  In 2023, he returns to torment Murdoch, kidnap The Girl, and survive various lethal stunts.  The show features a gay couple, so it's not just queer villains, but still, one doesn't expect such a blatant stereotype in 2023. 

And in Life with Luca, 2023, he returns to Derek as a grown-up.  He and Casey each have children who replicate the sibling-rivalry of their youth -- Luca is Casey's son.

More after the break. Caution: Explicit

Spencer Lloyd: From "American Idol" to a homophobic church, with nude hockey and j/o in between

Making the rounds of nude actor photos this morning, I came across "Spencer Lloyd jerks off his hot cock."   No other photos, but this one pops up on a google search.

No one by that name is listed on IMDB, but when you dump "Spencer Lloyd" into a search engine, it wants to auto-fill with the Canadian tv series Heartland: a multi-generational soap opera set on a ranch in Alberta.  He must have appeared somewhere in the nearly 300 episodes to date -- the IMDB often omits actors. 

 

Googling "Spencer Lloyd" and "Canada" reveals a young guy, probably just out of high school, who played hockey for the Beaver Valley Nitehawks in British Columbia.  He must have done that before he broke into showbiz -- or tried to break in.

After extensive research on Instagram, Facebook, the American Idol Blog, and Fame Watcher, I have pieced together Spencer's biography.

There's no Canadian hockey or soap opera -- that's another Spencer Lloyd.  But I'm not taking the photos down.

Our Spencer Lloyd grew up in Bryant, Arkansas, population 16,688, known for its La Quinta Motor Lodge, Cotton Shed Vintage Market, and Chick-Fil-A.  

In 2013, at the age of 19, he got on a bus with 3,000 other hopefuls for American Idol auditions in Little Rock.  He made it to the first round.

In Austin he sang "Say Something" and an original song, "At the Final Judgment." Uh-oh, sounds homophobic. He made it to the second round.

In Hollywood, he sang "Ordinary Girl" in the Wild-Card.  And then got booted.

He still performs and records music occasionally. Apple Music lists several singles for sale, most recently "No Love Like Ours," released December 2023.

In March 2016, Spencer found his way to Nashville, where he signed on with Wilhemina Modeling.  This must be where the nude photo comes from.

He moved to Chicago in May 2016, and went to work as fitness instructer at Barry's Chicago. 

The j/o video after the break. Caution: explicit.

David Henrie: The Wizard of Waverly Place re-wizards, but is he as gay-friendly and naked as his costars?

I thought lightning might strike twice, or rather five times. The Wizards of Waverly Place, which ran on the Disney Channel from 2007 to 2012, featured countless gay subtexts and about a dozen beefcake hunks who have gone on to a gay-positive adulthood.

Gregg Sulkin, left, displays his biceps and bulge in gay magazines.

Jake T. Austin starred in the gay-friendly The Fosters.

Dan Benson runs a gay-friendly OnlyFans page, where he reviews adult products and shows his dick.

Selena Gomez is "mostly straight," and reveals that her character, Alex Russo, was bisexual, but the Disney censors wouldn't let them say so.

David DeLuise is a gay ally who has a j/o video online -- after the break.

So what about David Henrie, who played eldest wizard in the family, Justin Russo?

Since Wizards, he has done a lot of voice work, and had minor roles in movies: 

Lane in Paul Blart, Mall Cop

Rudy Isling -- Walt Disney's competitor -- in Walt Before Mickey.

Clean Cut Man in Cardboard Boxer, about a homeless man who is forced into cage matches.

Sebastian in This is the Year, about a teen road trip.  David also directed, and his brother Lorenzo Henrie starred.  

The Young Ronald Reagan in a 2024 biopic.  Ugh.

Six episodes of Underdeveloped, a mockumentary about inept producers.

No gay content here.

 

David is now starring in Wizards Beyond Waverly Place:  Justin Russo gave up his wizard powers so he could marry a mortal woman.  Wait -- weren't his parents a mortal and a wizard?    Now he's a middle school vice principal with a wife and two sons, wearing an annoyingly overstated wedding ring that he flaunts around like a newly-engaged schoolgirl.

Trouble begins when he and his wife must become the foster parents to a girl who was raised in the wizard world.  And by the way, the fate of the universe is in her hands.

I watched two episodes -- awful.  No beefcake, no gay subtexts, except that Justin's son, played by Alkaio Thiele, doesn't mention an interest in girls.  A Redditer thinks that he will come out as gay eventually, but he'll have to get past his Dad first.

Is David at least gay-friendly in real life?  

Answer after the break. Caution: explicit.

Charles Ambrose: Civil War soldier, coast guardsman, martial artist, male model. With some risque photos

 

A partial cast list of Righteous Gemstones Episode 4.1 as appeared, with Charles Ambrose as Union Soldier Stephens.  Time for a profile.

His real name is Jason Ambrose, also Jason Charles Smith, and he's from Sandwich, Illinois, 60 miles west of Chicago. He attended Waubonsee Community College, then studied comedy at the Second City in Chicago.  I wonder if his standup routine is about growing up in Sandwich.

His resume lists several local Chicago-area plays, including The Music Man, The Moon is Down, Act Your Age, The Dating Game, and Julius Caesar.  And skills including combat, archery, horseback riding, firearms, rock climbing, jiu jitsu, and motorcycles.

Plus modeling.

23 credits on the IMDB, beginning in 2008 with the short Hell Mary.

Then occasional guest spots on tv, one or two every year.  Most of these characters don't appear in the plot synopses:

Andy on Sons of Anarchy, featuring the backside of Charlie Hunnan

Zane on Henry Danger

Deputy Jimmy on Lovecraft Country

Donny in Hollywood Vampire

Lucas in NCIS: Los Angeles

Coach Watkins in The Wonder Years update, with Julian Lerner as Brad Hitman.

His most substantial role to date: 23 episodes of the soap General Hospital, playing Ambrose, henchman of the evil Victor Cassadine.  On Victor's orders, he kidnaps Liesl Obrecht, kidnaps Ace Prince-Cassadine, and almost kills Spencer Cassadine

Coming up: The Legend of Van Dorn, about a Confederate soldier played by Lee Wilson, who was "immensely attractive to women."  Never to men, of course.  He was murdered by a husband upset over his wife's canoodling.  Charles plays General Red Jackson, another real-life figure.

And Secrets and Yards, about a small town football team with secrets.

More Charles after the break. Caution: Explicit.

"Sun in My Mouth": A depressed twink rides the subway, has explicit sex. And what he's been up to lately.

While looking at random cocks on AZ Nude Men, I came across Sun in My Mouth, with Artem Shcherbakov as a skinny, dissolute-looking twink who takes off his clothes on the beach while looking depressed, and then returns to his empty apartment to j/o on the phone while looking depressed.  Photos after the break

Black and white, extremely washed out, amateurish, with random close-ups of body parts and nonsequiter images.  It looked like one of those 1960s "stag films," or one of the early Gay Liberation movies like A Very Natural Thing.  But it is dated 2010.

Extremely mysterious.  Russia is a puritanical country.  How was it even permitted? And what is the meaning of "sun in my mouth?"  A Russian proverb?

 According to the IMDB, "It's a film about how we attempt to connect and understand other people by understanding ourselves."

I couldn't find the film itself, but the trailer is very artistic/experimental, black and white.  Artem rides a subway -- wait, those signs are in English -- walks on the beach, takes off his clothes, broods, goes home to an empty apartment, and beats off with a phone sex operator.

Is it even Russian?  Jessica Yatrovsky has nothing else listed on the IMDB.  The phone sex operator is played by Andrew Yang -- not a Russian name.

A man. So this is a gay film?  So Artem is depressed because he's struggling to come out?  

Artem has only one other acting role listed on the IMDB,  A Four Letter Word, 2007: "hook-up artist Luke considers becoming monogamous" for the "smug and handsome" Stephen (Jesse Archer, Charlie David).  He is listed as Vlad.

His Linkedin says that he is the founder of ROAR Games and Zheeshee in Brooklyn.  

His Facebook says that he was born in Minsk, Belorussia. He attended Fort Hamilton High School in Brooklyn and Touro College, where he majored in psychology.  He married Brian in 2021 and now lives in Washington DC.

More after the break. Caution: Explicit.

Simon Rex: From gay-ish porn to homophobic comedy to gay necrophilia to Bupkis

I don't know who Simon Rex is, except that he starred in Down Low, a Netflix bait-and-switch movie where everybody dies, and maybe Jackass?  But seeing or hearing his name gives me a vaguely disquieting, uncomfortable sensation, as if there's something wrong about him.  Let's do some research to find out why. 

Wikipedia gives a full, lenthy biography.  Born in San Francisco in 1974, started out modeling nude and wanking in four gay porn videos -- not having sex with any guys, just wanking.  Wikipedia mentions his girlfriend right off to assure readers that it's ok, he's straight, he never did any actual gay stuff.

Maybe that's where the disquiet comes from -- reading articles that mention his "disreputable" and "sleazy" past, without specifying that it's just some j/o videos.

He's not bad looking here. 

Modeling gigs for Calvin Klein and Tommy Hilfinger followed.

In 1995, at age 21, Simon became a VJ, like a disc jockey for videos, on MTV.  He says that this  made him a household name, "because I was on tv every day from 3-4."  Prime after-school time.

  

The VJ gig lasted for only two years, but it pushed Simon into a movie career:

He played "Slab O' Beef" in Shriek if You Know What I did Last Friday the 13th.

George Logan, a rapper/ women's boxing promoter in Scary Movie 3 and 4.  He commits suicide by overdosing on Viagra and jumping off a  balcony.  Also, there's a lot of homophobic rhetoric.

National Lampoon's Pledge This  is about the breasts of college girls. Simon plays Derek, who dumps one college girl with breasts when he falls in love with another.  A review notes that it presents lesbians as sexual predators and gay men as easily turned straight by the right pair of breasts.

I'm getting an idea of the reason for the disquiet.

His days of frontal nudity far behind, Simon rarely even took his shirt off. Here's one of the few examples, in Boy Toy, 2011. 

The title is misleading: it's not a gay movie.  It's about an unsuccessful but well hung underwear model who tries a new career as a gigolo. No, we don't see his dick.

2020s dick after the break. Warning: explicit.

Noah Centineo: The Boyfriend of Your Dreams, with five butts, three bulges, one penis, and no gay characters

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Allan Hyde: Roman-era vampire boy with one dude-on-dude kiss and a lot of frontal nudity on Danish tv

 

We're watching True Blood (2008-2014), about vampires coming "out of the coffin" in contemporary Louisiana.  They have a very bureaucratic organization: focus character Sookie is dating Civil War-era vampire Bill, who has to kowtow to the Sheriff of Area 5, Viking-era vampire Eric, who has to kowtow to the much more important Sheriff of Area 9, Dallas, Roman Empire era Godric (Allan Hyde).

Godric turned Eric, back in the day, and since vampires have a permanent erotic bond with their makers, the two lived as lovers for many years.  In the present day, he is a pacifist, pushing for human-vampire equality, and tired of eternal life after 2,000 years, ready to "meet the sun."

Allan Hyde was born in Copenhagen, with an English father and a Danish mother, so most of his 41 acting credits on the IMDB have been in Denmark:

6 episodes of 2900 Happiness, about rich people with scandals.

24 episodes of Juleønsket, about a girl and Christmas magic.

5 episodes of Gidseltagningen, about people being held hostage on the subway.  He really has a lot of range.

You and Me Forever, 2012, centers on a girl-power friendship, but it gives Allan's character a fyr på fyr kiss.  That's dude-on-dude.

This one is on Amazon Prime.

In Sommerin 92, 2015, the Danish football team is competing for the European championship, and Allan is showing his dick.  Not for the last time.

Allan wrote, directed, and starred in Cold Hawaii, 2020, which is not set in Hawaii, but in a Danish seaside community of that name, where two heterosexual couples decide to swap partners and spend 8 episodes getting around to it.

More nudity after the break

Lucien Laviscourt: Shirtless in soaps, romcoms, Shakespeare, Archie comics. With a j/o video

 

In 2020, during the COVID lockdown, everybody watched the Netflix series Emily in Paris, because they couldn't get to the real Paris. Surprise -- it's still streaming, with Season 4 coming up. The hapless social media content creator and her friends are still falling in love at the drop of a script, with Lucas Bravo, Charles Martins, Kevin Diaz, Paul Forman, and most recently Lucien Laviscount.

The British actor -- I know, I thought he was French, too -- has 43 credits listed on the IMDB, beginning with Clocking Off, 2002.

The interconnected lives of Manchester mill workers.  I wonder if they do a Full Monty.

Soap stud roles followed: 13 episodes of Grange Hill, 34 episodes of  Coronation Street, 18 episodes of Waterloo Road.  Plus guest spots on Life Bites, Father & Son, New Tricks, Shameless, Mount Pleasant...well, the list goes on and on.

I might want to see Still Star-Crossed, set in Verona shortly after the deaths of Romeo and Juliet, with new Montague-Capulet lovers investigating political machinations. Lucien plays Romeo in a flashback.

Plus a lot of modeling, here for Tommy Hilfinger.  I guess they're supposed to be very close teammates, not boyfriends.  But you never know.

The Bye-Bye Man, 2017, is Lucien's first starring role: "three friends stumble upon the horrific origins of a mysterious figure they discover is the root cause of the evil behind unspeakable acts."  

 Got all that? A bit overblown, with way too many adjectives, but I gather that we're working down from unspeakable acts caused by an evil caused by a mysterious figure who has horrific origins. 

Ulp. All you really need to know is it's all straight people, and Lucien shows his butt.

Another starring role in Snatch, 2017-2018, about...well, the IMDB description is suffering from adjective overload, but it's about con artists who get in over their heads.  The guys, Lucien and Rupert Grint, have a gay-subtext buddy-bond that gets ruined when they both fall in love with The Girl.

Katy Keene, 2020-21, was an ill-fated attempt to hit Riverdale gold by shoving minor Archie Comics characters like Alexander Cabot III into modern-day New York.   

More Lucien after the break

Zev Andros: Tony's gym boyfriend, Phuket diver, ball player, grandson of a Hollywood legend. With Phuket penises

 

Tony announces that he has recruited a new God Squad member.  He probably means a gym buddy, or gym boyfriend, or gym  buddy who he treats as a boyfriend

I can't give the last name of a non-actor, so I'll call him Zev Andros: an  EMT, divemaster with the American Divers of Phuket, baseball player, and bodybuilder. I wonder if he can attest to the veracity of that "Cowboys Do It Better" cap.

Zev's grandfather was Charles Aidikoff (1915-2016). who ran a famous screening room on Rodeo Drive  in Beverly Hills.  Movie stars, producers, and critics came to the 57-seat auditorium to see early versions and works in progress. eat the candy that he provided -- Mars Bars and Red Vines -- and exchange Hollywood gossip.

 

Charlie screened over 50,000 films between 1966 amd 2011, when his grandson Josh took over the screening room. It closed with his death in 2016.

His Facebook memorial page contains photos of him with Betty White, Raquel Welch, Peter Fonda, Danny DeVito, Mel Brooks, Ryan Gosling, Wes Bentley, Ice Cube, King Charles...well, everybody.

But let's get back to Bodybuilder Zev, who grew up in Phuket, the gay capital of Thailand, and now lives in Los Angeles.  Some highlights of his social media pages:

Zev: "The posing room goes hard."  I can see why, buddy.

 "Fitness motivation."  Yours, or ours?

More Zev after the break