Timothy Colombos: The WITS wizard in training grows up to a world of masculine beauty. And real estate. And d*cks.

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Ronnie Kroell: How is the Playgirl model and gay movie star related to Ronnie Rise Kroell, the anti-gay political strategist? With lots of Ronnie cocks

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Bentley Storteboom: Dutch, 25 years old, or gay? Or all of the above? With KJ Apa's dick, Karl Urban's butt, and Gavin Munn

 

When I saw this photo of someone named Bentley Storteboom (censored for reasons that will become apparent), I concluded that he was obviously Dutch, about 25 years old, and gay.  Turns out that I was wrong about two of the three conclusions.

1. Is he Dutch?   Storteboom means "Fallen Tree" in Frisian, spoken by 400,000 people in the northern regions of the Netherlands, like these shirtless guys watching ice skating in 20 degree weather (-10 C). 

No, he's Canadian.

2. Is he 25?

No, according to the IMDB, as of this writing he's 13 1/2! 

  

He may look 25 in the top photo, but here he looks like 16-year old Gavin Munn of The Righteous Gemstones.

Bentley was born in August 2012, in Maple Ridge, a suburb of Vancouver.  According to his mom, “He wasn’t your typical boy that wanted to play soccer or sports,” but he was interested in movies and the theater, and started asking about how kids got on tv.  His parents had no experience in performing arts, and had no idea.  Kudos for not trying to push him into sports, Mom and Dad.  My parents never let up.  "You're a boy!  Boys like sports!  Try out for football!"

They did some research, enrolled Bentley in the LeClerc School of Acting, and found him an agent, and he started auditioning at age six.  Soon he was appearing in commercials, and got the starring role in the student film Small Boy (2020): "After getting left out during a hide and seek game, a small boy realizes what he wants is different than what he was seeking from others."  So, different from the others?  Gotcha. 

That fall he won two Joey Awards (for Canadian youth): best actor in a commercial and best actor in a student film. 

In 2020 he won an iconic role in the series finale of Supernatural (2020).  As Dean is dying, he tells his gay-subtext partner Sam that he must "carry on."  The time for the "manly love of comrades" is over; it's time to accept his heterosexual destiny.  A few years later, Dean looks down from heaven and sees that Sam has acquiesced: he's got a wife and kid (Bentley). And the kicker: they're playing ball!  Bentley might not be "like the other boys," but his son is.  We hear the Kansas song:

Carry on, my wayward son. There'll be peace when you are done.
Lay your weary head to rest.  Don't you cry no more.

Funny, I feel like crying at this negation of the gay experience. 

Episodes of Nancy Drew (2021) and YoShowBiz (2021) followed, but Bentley's big break  (at age eight) came with what the local papers breathlessly praised as "a recurring role on a hit tv show!"  It was Riverdale (2017-2023), the campy, over-the-top, NSFW adaption of the Archie comics world. 

Left: KJ Apa, formerly Archie.

Bentley played Dagwood, one of the twin children of Betty's older sister Polly and Cheryl's brother Jason (Trevor Stines, left), in Seasons 5 and 6 (2021-22).  Who names their kid Dagwood?  He gets the worst of both families: the Blossom curse that kills all firstborn children (he manages to live), and the darkness that plagues the Cooper family, which turns him into a bully.  According to Bentley's Mom, this was a lot of fun for the "gentle child" who sometimes got bullied himself.  Gay kids are often bullied, Mom.  

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Isaiah Stone: Gay or bi Missouri boy shows the poverty, drugs, and despair of a broken America. And skateboards. With Shia, McCaul, and Isaiah d*cks

 

When Isaiah Stone appeared on the teen idol website, I knew that I had to do a profile. He's extraordinarily femme, and from redneck Springfield, Missouri.  How did he survive?

Maybe by showing people his snake.

Or hanging out with muscular friends.

 I'm going to do a standard profile:  Any gay or gay-subtext roles?  Gay in real life? And, if he's over 18, any nude photos?

1. Any gay roles?

An article calls Isaiah "the voice of American realism."  He was a standard shirtless skateboarding teen in Springfield, Missouri, growing up in poverty, worrying about becoming homeless, when his mom saw a call for extras for the movie Winter's Bone (2010).  Instead, the director cast him as the younger brother of Ree: a girl facing poverty, a mentally ill mother, a murdered father, and a meth head uncle (the only good guy in her life).  The winter's bone is the hand from her father's skeleton, which she tries to retrieve.   A review calls it "cold, hard, bleak, despairing, ruthless, and sneering."  Yah think?.

A few years later, the same director cast Isaiah in American Honey (2016), about "makeshift communities in an America blighted by poverty, violence, drugs and the state’s failure to protect individuals."  A girl named Star flees poverty, meth addiction, and  sexual abuse to travel around the country with a group of dispossessed teens led by Shia LaBeouf, who becomes her boyfriend. Isaiah plays a skateboarding teen that they pick up in Missouri.

A review calls it "a raw portrayal of the chaotic energy of youth culture and the reality of poverty in America."  Yuck.  But at least McCaul Lombardi pulls out his stuff.

And Shia shows while getting busy.

After the short You Know Where (2017),  "a meditation on the transcendence of movement and action" featuring skateboarders, Isaiah appeared  in Leave No Trace (2018): Ben Foster plays a homeless war veteran wit PTSD, living illegally in a trailer park with his teenage daughter Tom.  Isaiah plays her friend, who hopes to one day escape from the squalor and move to "Colorado, maybe Utah."  But it doesn't seem to be a hetero-romance; all of the hugging, kissing, and forehead-pressing in the trailer occur between father and daughter.

That's his entire acting opus.  The voice of American realism after minor roles in three movies?  That's a bit optimistic, innit?

To find out what Isaiah has been doing lately, I checked his Instagram.  He fishes, plays with snakes and a ferret, skateboards with his shirt off, hugs his mom and stepdad, goes to see honky-tonky singer Tyler Childers with a lady, hangs out with his buds. No jobs, acting or otherwise, are mentioned.

More after the break.  Caution: Explicit.

Justin Ellings: Kyle from the awful clown episode of "Modern Family" plays Corey Haim and Sean Giambrone, shows his physique and his d*ck

 

In Modern Family Episode 11.1 (2019), high school vice principal Cam invites a group of "wayward teens" to his house to gain their trust by being the "cool mentor."  Things go wrong when his beloved, awful clown figurine goes missing, and he accuses them of stealing it, horrifying the viewers and his husband Mitchell with his increasingly vituperative insults: "You're trash! You're garbage!  Everyone has given up on you!"   Finally Mitchell can't stand it anymore, and announces that they are innocent: he threw out the figurine because it was incredibly ugly.  

Then Cam comes clean -- the kids are actually the high school drama club, playing wayward teens to force Mitchell to confess.  

I'm not happy with the plotline.  Seeing Cam lash out was rough.  And why would  you destroy something that your husband valued?  Something that was on prominent display in the living room?  But it was worth it to see drama club member Kyle, played by Justin Ellings.

19 years old when he filmed the episode.

A Short Guy, 5'6"  Forget the five feet; tell me more about the six inches. 

Endless beefcake photos on his Instagram and Facebook pages. 

Including one where he squirts.

Interestingly, Justin's official website shows a map of his location (so you can stalk him?).  He's on Cahuenga just north of Lexington, near my old gym in West Hollywood.  Cue the nostalgic reminiscences of my years in the gay mecca.

Justin grew up in Milwaukee, where he starred in The Music Man (2011) and The Sound of Music (2012) at the Skylight Opera Theatre Center.  He graduated from Arrowhead High School at age 16, then moved to L.A. to pursue his acting career.

His first major acting role was on the Nickelodeon teencom Sam & Cat (2013): he played Jarvis, one of the kids that the former ICarly star and her girlfriend babysit.  According to the fan wiki, Jarvis is gay.

I doubt that a Nickelodeon show would have a canonical gay character, but even if it was subtext, it's a great beginning.  Unfortunately, Justin's characters in other tv programs, on Girl Meets World (2015). Game Shakers (2017), American Housewife (2018), and Wandavision (2021), don't appear in the plot synopses. 

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Justin is primarily interested in stunt work.  He has 33 stunting credits listed on the IMDB, including episodes of The Middle, Young Sheldon, 13 Reasons Why (where he was presumably Miles Heizer's butt double), 9-1-1, Stranger Things, and The Fabelmans.

 He was Sean Giambrone's stunt double on 19 episodes of The Goldbergs.

More after the break. Caution: Explicit

Pilot Bunch: Unbreakable boyfriend, zombie boyfriend, teen Jesus manager. With n*de dudes from New Orleans and Hawaii

 

I may have met Pilot Bunch, who played Johnny B., buddy of the teenage Jesus on The Righteous Gemstones, at a Halloween party a few years ago. No, we didn't hook up.

Today he looks a lot like my niece before she began transitioning.  And coincidentally, their boyfriends look very similar, too.

Pilot was born in Kazakhstan, but grew up in Atlanta, where he graduated from Woodward Academy in 2025.   His first acting role was in The Lion King, performed at his elementary school.  He got an agent at age 11, and began appearing on tv at age 14.  To date he has twelve on-screen credits  listed on the IMDB, including:

Four episodes of Drama Club (2021), a Nickelodeon mockumentary about a middle school drama club recruiting a football player (Chase Vacnin).  Sounds like "High School Musical."

Pilot plays Colin, the chem-class lab partner of focus character Mack (a girl).  In an interview in TresA, he says that he loved the character: "witty, sarcastic, and always messing with Curtis (Reyn Doi).  Reyn Doi usually plays gay characters, so we can assume that Colin is gay-subtext or gay-vague.

In 2021, Pilot played Vincent, a resident of the Alexandria Safe Zone, in  the post-apocalyptic The Walking Dead.  "A reckless, immature bully," he and his friends play "chicken" with a child zombie (Augustus Morgan, son of Jeffrey Dean Morgan, who plays antagonist Negan).  He says that the role was fun because he got to hang out with Augustus in his zombie makeup. 

He also has roles on The Wonder Years, 115 Grains, The Hill, and Red One, and some theater, including Shenandoah.  He plays Robert, who is kidnapped by Union soldiers during the Civil War (right, with Caleb Baumann as Gabriel)  Robert isn't dead; Gabriel is his best friend, not an angel.

Pilot's biggest role to date is in The Unbreakable Boy (2025), a biographical heartwarmer featuring Austin (Jacob Laval), who has a brittle-bone disorder and is on the autism spectrum.  Pilot starts out a bully, but becomes Austin closest friend and supporter. In a feature article in Pop Size, he notes that the role has special significance for him, because his brother is on the autism spectrum

Pilot's Instagram contains no pictures of him with girls, except for this one, but he could hardly help it: it was at a friend's birthday party.  Otherwise it's boys all the way down.

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Kayden Koshelev: Alkaio's Other Half plays a zombie, a drag boy, and a nonbinary firefighter. With Dornan and twink d*cks

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Taylor Gregory: The fierce, fabulous Barbie kid grows up to ballet, bodybuilding, and kissing boys. With bonus Czerwonko going downtown

 When I was doing a profile of Iain Armitage, who played Young Sheldon, the preteen and teenage version of the Big Bang Theory's neurotic physicist , I thought Wyatt McClure should come next.  He played next door neighbor Billy, who started with a gay-subtext interest in Iain before the writers decided to give him a crush on his sister Missy instead.

Wyatt McClure turned out to be unsuitable; no beefcake, and straight.  But he did draw my attention to his best friend, Taylor Gregory: 17 years old as of this writing, and extremely muscular.

Taylor has done some acting, but he is primarily a dancer, interested in a career in ballet. Here he plays the Prince in Nutcracker at Christmastime 2023.  I don't know why whoever is curating his Instagram photos cropped his head off.

Auditioning for the Houston Ballet Academy's intensive summer session in 2025.  Did they require you to dance shirtless on your audition video, or did you think your physique would give you an edge?

Gay in real life:

Taylor: "We weren't celebrating Valentine's Day, but we were."  His date, a guy named Carson, is fondling his leg under the table. We don't see Wyatt's date; maybe they're taking the photo.

Taylor tries to kiss Wyatt, who isn't into it.  

Any questions?

Any gay roles:

In 2015, when he was six years old, Biloxi, Mississippi native starred in a commercial for Mochino's high-end Barbie doll collection.  He was  the first boy ever to be shown playing with Barbies on tv.  With his femme hair and his "fierce and fabulous" snap, he became a media sensation and "a voice of the LGBTQ community."  

In one of the news stories I watched, Taylor's Mom seemed uncomfortable with the idea of her son being a gay icon.  It was just an acting role; in real life, he plays with Matchbook cars (translation: "My son is straight")

Gay boys are allowed to play with cars, Mom, just as straight boys are allowed to play with dolls.  You can't tell from the toys they like. 

But she did allow him to perform at the  Gulf Coast Equality Fest, an annual LGBTQ+ event "aimed at inspiring, educating, honoring, and celebrating our community and our allies."  

More after the break.  Caution: Explicit.

Luke Speakman: The femme bully of "Weapons" meets a lot of hunks, likes capybaras, plays a boy raised as a girl. With Dad and Dylan dicks

 

When I saw Weapons (2025), a thriller about the mysterious disappearance of all of the kids in a third grade class (except one), I thought that the bully (right) was a girl due to their long hair and femme mannerisms -- until their dad called them Matthew (played by Luke Speakman).

There is a positively portrayed gay couple in the movie (played by Benedict Wong and Clayton Farris), and it's quite a welcome change to have the femme boy the bully instead of the victim, so writer/director Zach Creger is obviously a queer ally. But Matthew is not on screen long enough to express any same-sex interests (besides, the rule in movies is, all kids must be portrayed as heterosexual).  But maybe Luke Speakman is gay in real life. 

Left: Luke meets his crush, Merrick Hanna.

Left: Luke's birthday in April 2025: "Turned 12 today!  Guess I'm old now!"  Just wait, buddy.

Growing up in a heteronormative society, gay boys are often unaware that they like boys, or interpret their interest as friendship or hero worship.  And if they are aware, they are unlikely to mention it on their parent-curated social media pages.  But maybe we can catch some glimmers of same-sex interest to augment Luke's femme appearance.

Born in Athens, Georgia in 2013, Luke began acting on screen at age five, in Steven Spielberg's Amazing Stories (2020): he plays the young version of Sam (Dylan O'Brien, left), who goes through a time portal to the 1920s and meets Girl of His Dreams (be careful, she could be your great-grandmother).

Next came seven episodes of the podcast series The Burned Photo (2021-22): two women's "lives become intertwined when they discover they are being terrorized by the same multi-generational curse that is determined to end their family lineages."  So some lesbian subtexts going on?

Five episodes of Lost Man Down (2022), about an aspiring actor masquerading as a talent agent.  Luke plays a baseball fan who believes in aspiring player Takeshi (Tsuyoshi Kusanagi, center).  The guy with them is not Tsuyoshi's boyfriend.  I don't think.

An Asian hunk.  Not particularly relevant, but none of the adult stars of Lost Man Down have nude photos.

More after the break