Pablo Castelblanco: The OCD guy from "Happy's Place" bulges, beefcakes, plays gay, but closets his Insta. With Hung Howey and Pablo penis
Daniel DiMaggio: The queerbaiting boy of "American Housewife" grows up to play Count Chocula and post n*de photos
You may be familiar with Daniel DiMaggio, no relation to Joe DiMaggio, as Oliver Otto on American Housewife (2016-21). I never heard of it, but I wouldn't have watched anyway. Who wants to watch a sicom about June Cleaver or Donna Reed?
He is presented as gay, with everything from pictures of muscular men on his bedroom wall to an interest in ballet to a boyfriend, the wealthy, femme Cooper (Logan Bell). Everyone thinks they are boyfriends, anyway, including Cooper himself, who is upset every time Oliver claims that they are not dating. But then he backs off and gets a girlfriend.
Logan Bell (the femme one) is gay in real life, and states that he played Cooper as gay. So why five seasons of "crumbs" that led nowhere? Fans were irate when the showrunners were too cowardly to let Oliver come out.
Daniel already has two strikes against him (baseball metaphor, har har) for five years of queerbaiting. Let's check on his other projects.
He was born in 2003 in Los Angeles, and began acting at age nine in the short Geisho (2010): a man (Horatio Sanz) wants to become the world's first male geisha. Kind of gender-fluid.
Next, a 2013 episode of Burn Notice, which, I discovered today, is not about a hospital burn unit, in spite of the misleading title. It's about a spy who was "burned" (fired). How the heck are potential viewers supposed to know that? Daniel plays the young version of focus character Michael (Jeffrey Donovan).
More after the break
Nathaniel Bacon: Canadian muscleman plays classic gay characters, but is he gay in real life? With three cock shots, Christmas, and Charlie Brown
My "Profiles to Do" collection has a folder entitled "Nathaniel Bacon," compiled on December 25th of last year: a day that I generally devote to celebrating the end of the dark melancholic Holiday Season and those depressing Holiday songs, especially Judy Garland's "Haaaaaaave youuuuurself..."
Finally, a G-rate photo. He's with a lady, but that can't be helped. When he's not bulging, he's hugging, frolicking with, or dining with a lady (or two or three). I'm going to peg Bacon Boy as straight.
Chad Allen: The Dr. Quinn hunk is outed, but still plays heterosexual romantic leads and a gay detective. With his cock and 1990s San Francisco
I finally cleaned out my "Profiles to Do" file, eliminating Tyler Posey (extremely ugly), Ethan Cutkosky (only four photos), and Raphael Luce (already profiled him). Twelve guys are left: Nicholas Bechtel, Nathaniel Bacon, Ben Patrick Johnson...wait, Chad Allen. The name brings back a flood of memories.
In 1995, my partner Lane and I moved to San Francisco, because why wouldn't you? It was Gay Heaven. It was also very difficult, cold, crowded, dirty, and dangerous. Lane lasted for about six months before dumping me and high-tailing it back to the comfort of West Hollywood. I stuck it out for two years.
The main problem: We felt obligated to serve as stand-ins for the thousands of gay men who dreamed of living in Gay Heaven. Every moment had to count. Every night was a mad rush of beer busts, bear parties, AIDS benefits, book signings, art openings, film premieres, and hookups, until, by Saturday night we were exhausted, and more often than not just wanted to get Chinese take-out and chill in front of the tube. So we watched Married..with Children, Lois & Clark, Leaving L.A. (because we had left L.A.), and Doctor Quinn, Medicine Woman (1993-98)
Jane Seymour played the titular doctor, also known as Doctor Mike, who moved out West in 1867 to deal with gamblers, grifters, bureaucrats, cowboys, Indians, and a lot of sick and dying people. No gay characters, but come on, she was named Mike, she disguised herself as a man on many occasions, and she had a lesbian-subtext romance with her midwife, Charlotte. After The Girl died, Doctor Mike adopted her three children and started a romance with a cowboy (Joe Lando). You have to move on.
Chad Allen played Matthew Cooper, Dr. Mike's adopted son. His plotlines involved trying to father his younger siblings after Mom's death (by rattlesnake bite), getting a girlfriend (who dies of rabies), being trapped in a cave-in, getting a new girlfriend, getting a gambling addiction, chasing cattle rustlers, and having various accidents. Sure, it was ridiculous, but in the 1990s everything on tv was ridiculous. Remember Melrose Place and Beverly Hills 90210?
Joe Lando appeared in Playgirl, but didn't show his dangly bits.
But Chad did. At least, some leaked photos purportedly of a young adult Chad made the rounds of nude celebrity websites in the early 2000s.
Chad had been appearing heart-warmers and tear-jerkers since he was seven years old: Hotel, Webster, Highway to Heaven, Punky Brewster, and The Wonder Years (that's Fred Savage beside him).
His most iconic role was Tommy Westphal, the autistic son of Dr. Westphal in 17 episodes of the homophobic medical drama St. Elsewhere (1983-88). We only watched one episode, and it was homophobic.
The season finale of St. Elsewhere revealed that the entire series was imagined by Tommy as he gazed at a snow globe. It was all a dream. This enraged fans, but isn't all fiction someone's dream?
Chad also played more conventional roles, like the 12-year old David Witherspoon in 46 episodes of the dramedy Our House (1986-88). The then-famous curmudgeon Wilford Brimley starred as the grandpa to three cute kids.
And Zach Nichols, who competes with Giovanni Ribisi for the attention of The Girl in 26 episodes of the comedy (sort of) My Two Dads (1987-1990).
In 1996, Chad was outed when the tabloid The Globe published a leaked photo of him kissing a guy!
Usually in the 1990s, coming out or being outed meant an instant end to your career, but Jane Seymour was a strong LGBT ally, and insisted that Chad continue appearing as Matthew in every episode of Dr. Quinn. The writers did manage to avoid giving him a new girlfriend.
More after the break
Drake Bell: A lot has happened since "Drake and Josh," including some gay videos
You may have gone to his first post-Drake movie, College (2008), where he and his three friends head for a "college weekend" (a weekend of fun activities to convince high schoolers to apply). Theirs involves nonstop shenanigans, all intensely heteronormative. At least Drake is taped to a statue of the founder with his backside exposed to the world. I think it's supposed to be humiliating.
You may have watched A Fairly Odd Movie: Grow Up, Timmy Turner (2011), to see how Nickelodeon would handle the gay-subtext classic. They flubbed it. Timmy is absurdly heteros*xual.
And then you probably relegated Drake to nostalgic memories, not paying a lot of attention to what he's been doing for the last few years.
I checked. Brace yourself. It's a lot.
More Fairly Oddparents movies.
A lot of stuff with former coster Josh Peck
A lot of voice work, especially Spider-Man in various cartoons, even Phineas and Ferb, and a video game.
An Elf named Snowflake
Ben the Wizard in Bad Students of Crestview Academy
The reality series Splash, where celebrities dive for charity.
The paranormal series Silverwood
Damian in American Satan
A career in music, with six studio albums, eighteen singles, twelve music videos, and sold-out concerts. Some songs in Spanish that top the Mexican charts.
Drake's personal life after the break. Warning: it gets rocky.
Alex Polcyn: The "Wonderman" Golden Boy plays a dozen gay characters, mostly bottoms, shows us his stuff, but grins at his lady's bosom.
The top 25 gay-coded, beefcake-heavy shows of the decade
I grew up in a working-class, Evangelical household where tv was the only permitted form of entertainment, so it was on all the time. I still watch an hour or two almost every day, mostly to check for gay texts or subtexts. That's a lot of tv programs. Most fade into oblivion, but some are memorable due to their intriguing premises, interesting settings, gay subtexts, or beefcake -- or all four. These are the top 25 gay-coded, beefcake-heavy shows of the last decade, premiering 2016 to 2025.
2016
The Crown. The life of Queen Elizabeth, with the glamour, glitz, and soap opera shenanigans of the royal family. No gay characters, but future Doctor Who Matt Smith plays Prince Philip.
Kim's Convenience. Korean-Canadian family in Toronto, with no gay characters after the first episode, but a lot of buddy-bonding and beefcake.
2017
Big Mouth. Middle schoolers negotiate puberty, with the help of individually-assigned hormone monsters and other supernatural beings. The gay guy eventually gets his own plotlines, coming out to his parents, dating the bi guy, and learning about sexting.
Britannia. Romans vs. Celts in 43 AD, with creepy Druids, some possible paranormal, muscular soldiers, and some gay subtexts.
2018
Disenchantment: A parody of Medieval fantasy. Disappointing in the first season: my review calls it "gay free." But showrunners often postpone the queer characters: they think all viewers are homophobic, and will run away screaming unless they become invested in the show before the queer characters show up. Later seasons become immensely gay-friendly.
The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina. The teen witch of Archie comics with dark comedy plotlines, a same-sex romance, and a lot of hunk. ranging from Ross Lynch as regular boyfriend Harvey to Moses Thiessen as the pizza delivery guy.
2019
The Righteous Gemstones. An absurdly wealthy family of Southern televangelists negotiate threats. I'm not sure I should include this one since, in retrospect, it was a little annoying. Endless queer codes involving Gideon, Eli, and Pontius, with no resolution, just "crumbs." And it took forever for Kelvin and Keefe to become canon. They should have kissed at the end of Season 1.
But I spent two years arguing about, researching, and posting about the show. And I found some cute gay actors...who haven't posted on social media since the series ended, grr.
2020
Panchayat. Engineering grad Abhishek is talked into a civil service job in a remote village, where there are so many queer codes that I could swear they were deliberate. And he doesn't meet The Girl!
More after the break
Luke Blumm: Femme boy survives the Nazis, a cult, and Maine, but not a homophobic Mom. With his twink physique and some co-star cocks
Sonny Kendall: Obviously gay, too young for nude photos, so his EastEnder teen had better pay off. With Boreanaz and twink cocks
Sonny Kendall (the short one) appeared on the teen idol website flexing and hugging guys. These two are nearly holding hands.
As of this writing, he is 16 years old, so I won't be looking for nude photos (beefcake is ok).
I've checked his social media, and there's no question that he's gay.
Sonny was born in East London in 2010. He was attending the Rhodes Theatre School in Romford in 2021, when he was cast in the soap EastEnders.
The soap opera EastEnders, on since 1985, features the impoverished, the down-and-out, and the criminal . We don't see British versions of the Lords of One Life to Live or the Quartermaines of General Hospital. At least, not many of them.
It is known for "difficult," controversial plot arcs, involving murder, rape, drug addiction, and human trafficking. And LGBT people. The first male same-sex kiss on British tv, between boyfriends Colin and Guido (Michael Cashman, Nicholas Donovan), in 1987. It didn't happen on American tv until 2003.
Left: When you search for nude photos of Nicholas Donovan, this one appears. I think it's David Boreanaz.
Sonny's character, Tommy Moon, is the son of Kat and Alfie Moon (Shane Ritchie), who have a tumultuous relationship, with various infidelities, a brain tumor, prostate cancer. an injury in a fire, and having twin sons named Bert and Ernie. Oh, and Tommy turns out to be the biological son of Alfie's cousin, the villainous Michael Moon (Steve John Shepherd, left).
Tommy is born in 2010, and starts out life in a controversial plotline about being switched with a dead baby. It takes a few plot twists for Alfie and Kat to realize that their kid is actually alive, and get him back. He lives through more murders, diseases, and infidelities, until 2014 , when the parents win the lottery and get the heck out of the East End.
More after the break

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