Nathan Kress, Freddie from ICarly, grown up. Is he still homophobic? Is he still shy about showing his dick?

Many Nickelodeon shows of the 2000s had strong homophobic subtexts, and  ICarly (2007-2012) was one of the worst.  Miranda Cosgrove starred as Carly, who hosts an internet comedy show with her butch-but-straight buddy Sam (a girl) and nerd-next-door-with-a- stereotyped crush on her, Freddie (Nathan Kress).  

They are supervised by her wacky bi-subtext older brother, Spencer. 

 On the way, the contempt for gay men, or as Sam calls them, prancies, oozes out in joke after joke.  The most egregious is Spencer being chased down and arrested for appearing in public in a dress; cross-dressing has not been a crime in any American city since the 1970s.

I especially disliked Nathan Kress, amd not only for the horribly cliched "unrequited crush" plotlines.  As he bulked up, he steadfastly refused to permit beefcake photos.  To an extent, that's his choice: his body, his rules.  But when you choose a career that depends on displaying that body, and further set yourself up as a teen idol, you have a sort of obligation to your fans.

More annoying was his reason for failing to post beefcake: he was a way, way conservative fundamentalist of the "hating ten gays before breakfast" variety, and he didn't want girls and prancies getting ideas.

Today Nathan's instagram is full of wife-and-children pictures. 

Still hardly any beefcake, unless incorporated into the wife-and-kid pictures.

And he's still ultra-fundamentalist.

I wouldn't find this mug so annoying if I didn't know that Nathan's God is good only to heterosexuals.  

I don't know who the crazy looking friend is.

More Nathan after the break

The Mystery of Xale/Egor Spider: From New York or Texas? Or Russia? Fitness model or car salesman? Big or small cock? Is he Spider-Man?

 

It was an Instagram page consisting of 30 or so photos of this guy flexing, all posted in July 2026.

Sometimes wearing glasses and a cowboy hat.  His name was Xale Spider.

He's also got a Spider Xale  Instagram, with photos of Spider-man, real spiders, his sister, who is wearing a University of Wisconsin sweatshirt, and his Dad, who seems to own a carpet store.  

I found SpiderXale on X, with 24,000 followers but no content except for a few "sensitive content" photos, and "New York."  Wait -- what about Wisconsin?

He seems to be a redhead now.

It linked to a site called Fansly, which seems to be like OnlyFans.  You pay $9 per month for "Hot Content."  Except there are no examples, and now his name is Egor Xale.

More after the break.  Caution: Explicit.

Jonathan Tison: Short, obviously gay Harrison Houde lookalike with a boyfriend, a chest, and cock pics. Well, at least one of those.

This one wasn't my fault.  I saw the Instagram recommendation while on my cell phone: Jonathan Tillson, a cute short guy who looks like Harrison Houde, Bowie on Some Assembly Required.  Plus he has beefcake shots, and he's obviously gay -- the first 12 photos on his Instagram show him hugging, riding the back of, and visiting Greece with his boyfriend.  Perfect for a profile!    

But when I returned on my laptop, the recommendation was gone, and Jonathan Tillson is a white-haired comedian from Boston.  

Maybe Tillotson?  Or John instead of Jonathan?

It took a lot of sleuthing, including going through my search history and cache, to find short, obviously gay actor Jonathan Tison.

I like profiling little-known, obscure actors rather than superstars, and  Jonathan has only five acting roles listed on the IMDB:

A 2014 episode of the true-crime docuseries Snapped: In Mississipi in 2006, a woman killed her estranged husband, but talked her thirteen-year old half-brother (played by Jonathan) into confessing to the crime. 

A 2018 episode of the true-crime docuseries Murder Calls: In Oklahoma in 2011, a woman claims that an intruder broke into the house and killed her husband, but actually she did it.  Jonathan plays Young Tim, but there's no Adult Tim in the cast list.

A 2018 episode of the true-crime docuseries Murder By Numbers. Dallas cops track down the Eyeball Killer.  Jonathan plays the teenage Eyeball.

You're getting typecast, buddy.

Jonathan wrote, directed, and starred in two shorts:

Fade From View (2025): A teenager (Jonathan), "caught in the fallout of his parents' divorce," goes to live with his grandfather.  They bond "in the stillest hours past midnight."

Left: I think this is Jonathan's backside.

At least it doesn't begin "After the death of...", like 90% of these vanity projects.

Joint Hatred for Paul (2025): Writing partners Noah (Jonathan) and Ava discuss how much they hate Paul Shoeman (not a real person, and not in the cast list).

.

But wait -- there's more.  Jonathan has a personal website where he identifies as an "actor, singer, dancer, adventurer" from Knoxville, Tennessee, who began performing at age nine, and has worked on professional, regional, and LORT stages.  He specializes in "The Earnest Boy-Next-Door, whose infectious smile tries to distract from the truth his eyes can't hide."  

His resume lists ten theatrical credits, but most are identified as "family-friendly," which means "heterosexuals only."  I'll check those that don't have the FF label:

Double Helix, a musical about the woman who helped discover the structure of DNA, while facing misogyny and anti-semitism. Jonathan played her coworker, Raymond Gosling, who was straight in real life.

Titus Andronicus.  He played Lucius, son of the violent warrior-king.  Straight.

Urinetown has no specifically gay characters, but sometimes productions play up the gay subtexts.  But Jonathan's character, Bobby Strong, gets The Girl.

Left: Bobby was played by  Richard Fleesman in the London production.

She Loves Me: Jonathan played Arpad, the teenage delivery boy who has a gay-subtext bond with shop owner Maraczek in this ancestor of You Got Mail. 

One gay-subtext role out of 15 theatrical and on-screen performances is not a great record, Jon Baby.  But at least you're going to show us your cock, right?

More after the break.  Caution: Explicit

The 18 best Gemstones stories: Kelvin with Percy, Cousin Karl with Vance and Percy, Keefe with Gideon, Pontius with Stacy. Plus Abraham comes out

 

I never wrote fan fiction before, but I got the urge frequently during the run of The Righteous Gemstones, to "fix" terrible plotlines, expand upon minor characters, and respond to the incessant "that doesn't make Kelvin gay" fan complaints.   There are 25 on Archive of Our Own, but I've only reposted 18 here:

Before Season 1

How do I Know If I'm G...:  Pontius pressures his older brother, 16-year old Gideon, into coming to his sleepover.  He invites the "juvenile delinquent" Manny, gets his first kiss, and wonders if he is g___.

During/After Season 1

My Boyfriend and my Satanist Ex-boyfriend at Thanksgiving Dinner.  Kelvin wants them to stay closeted at Thanksgiving Dinner with Keefe's family, but his ex-boyfriend, Daedalus, is coming, too, and wants to get back together.

Is there Sex After Death?  Scotty dies in Episode 1.8, but Grandma Aimee-Leigh guides him through all the moments of Gideon's life, so he can forgive him for all the moments lost to pettiness and fear.

Kelvin and Keefe under the Christmas tree.  After the events of Season 1, everyone thinks that Kelvin and Keefe are boyfriends -- except for Kelvin.

During/After Season 2

BJ's Angels.  I envision Gideon and two members of the God Squad getting jobs as detectives in a Charlie's Angels parody, with BJ as Charlie.

During/After Season 3

Bondage doesn't solve everything.  There were several hints in Episodes 1-2 that Kelvin and Keefe were into BDSM, so I wrote a story where they guys break up during a BDSM scene, then reconcile when Kelvin arranges for Keefe to get a job as manager of the Gemstone Health Club.

Kelvin's Rebound Date with Percy.  Percy appears in just one scene, as an interior designer working on the church board room.  In this story, Kelvin is distraught after the Episode 3.4 breakup, and his siblings suggest that he move on...with a date with Percy.

Gideon Moves out of the Friend Zone. After the Episode 3,4 breakup, Gideon gets the nerve to ask Keefe out.  They have a hookup, but is that enough to move out of the friend zone?

The Kiss Heard 'Round the World.  The day of the Episode 3.8 Kelvin/Keefe kiss, seen through the eyes of Amber, Gideon, Eli, Judy, Keefe, and Jesse.

More after the break

Fresh Off the Boat Episode 3.2: Musclemen flex, Walter is homophobic, Evan finds a new boyfriend, and Eddie is traumatized by cocks.

Since identifying Hudson Yang as "probably gay," I've been going through his tv series, Fresh Off the Boat, about a "fresh off the boat" Taiwanese-American family in the 1990s.  There are a number of recurring gay characters, but I'm looking for gay texts and subtexts among the sons, Eddie, Emery, and Evan.  Episode 3.2, "Breaking Chains" (2016) has some, plus beefcake and homophobia.

I'm skipping the A Plot, where Dad Louis (Randall Park) hires a housekeeper, thus insulting his wife Jessica, who thinks that he thinks she is a failure as a woman (because her gender identity is based on her ability to clean up?) 

In the B Plot, Eddie (Hudson Yang) and his friends are about to enter eighth grade, so they'll need either great gear or great stories.

Trent (Trevor Larcom) has great gear: he went to a theme park and got a scrunchie depicting the mascot.

Walter (Prophet Bolden) tells him that it "looks like a gay raindrop." 

 Homophobic comment, buddy.

Brian (Dash Williams) has a great story: he had mono, so he stayed inside watching Cinemax.  Now he knows a lot about boobs, and wants to become a pizza delivery boy.  Ugh, heteronormative girl-craziness.

Dave (Evan Hanneman) argues they don't need gear or stories, because they'll be eighth graders, practically upperclassmen.  Eddie (Hudson Yang) agrees: "We'll be men among boys!"  Sounds like their middle school covers grades 7-9, and high school grades 10-12.

Cut to a fantasy of the guys as grown-up musclemen flexing and grinning. I count six girls and one boy swooning over them -- but the one boy acknowledges the existence of LGBT people. 

Eddie's brother Emery is also impressed.  He gasps, "Who are those MEN?"

"Nah, son," Adult Eddie answers.  "We're eighth graders."

Ok, two boys are swooning over the musclemen.

In case you were wondering, Trent becomes Chris Kimball (below); Walter, Cleveland Berto, Dave, Colin Owens; and Eddie, Chen Tang (left)

Some dicks after the break

Zak Ford Williams: Better Bridgerton Batteries and the British Stonewall: all gay roles all the time. With a lot of cocks.

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Sawyer Nicholson: A dimly lit chest shot leads to Kit Connor, Colby College, a croc monster, Wally's cock, and two nude Sawyers

In Batwoman Episode 3.1, two college students sneak into an indoor swimming pool at night. Derek takes off his shirt and pants and tries to kiss the girl, but she playfully tosses him into the water.  He's under there for a long time.  Suddenly he emerges, being tossed around by an unknown force.  The pool fills with blood.   Turns out that he has been eaten by a newly-created crocodile monster.  

The monster takes the girl back to its lair to eat later, giving her a huge amount of screen time and a Batwoman rescue, while Derek is on-screen for like ten seconds and never interacts with the main cast.   Apparently tv writers can't imagine that a man would ever need rescuing.  They must be strong, powerful, in control; only women get to be damsels in distress.  Even in a show that has to date featured two kickass lesbian superheroes.   

We don't even get a clear picture of Derek during his ten seconds.  This photo is as clear as I could get,  and still half in shadow, there's a brief face shot -- which makes him look like Kit Connor of Heartstopper -- and the tossing-about is too fast for a good look.  

It's like the director has to film a pool scene, so the croc monster can get them, but wants to obscure Derek's body as much as possible.  The Girl is sequestered in a brightly-lit sewer, with everything clearly on display.

Dang it!  To assuage my disappointment over the Derek erasure, I'm going to research the actor, Sawyer Nicholson.  

He has four acting credits listed on the IMDB:

"Child in Meadow" in The Last Mimzy (2007)

Derek in Batwoman (2021).

Huge Football Player in How to Win a Popularity Contest (2026): Elle and her archnemesis Nate team up to win back their exes, and end up in love with each other.

And Walters in two episodes of Off Campus (2026), with Hannah using a jock (Belmont Cameli, left) to make her crush jealous.  I couldn't find him in the two episodes, and he's not mentioned in any synopsis.

Sawyer seems to be pursuing a career as a stunt performer.  He has 14 stunt credits, mostly from 2025 and 2026, including Tron: Ares and Playdate (which has gay subtexts), and episodes of Black Mirror, Upload, The Last of Us, and Every Year After.

He stunt doubled for Luke (Lachlan Quarmby), an "arrogant" rookie constable, in the Canadian police procedural Allegiance (2024-26).

And Wally (Milo Manheim), the ghost of a 1980s jock, on School Spirits.  So we can assume that this is Sawyer's butt.

But it's the real Milo's j/o video.

Next I'll check Sawyer's social media.

Problem: There's a female Sawyer Nicholson, a very famous runner who gets 99% of the google results, even when my search string ends with -female -girl -lady absolutely -ladies, men  only.  Piecing between them for Sawyer Nicholson male actor men only,  I found no online resumes, no newspaper or magazine articles, and only three social media sites:

A Sawyer Nicholson Male Actor Men Only  on Facebook is from Brunswick, Maine, and graduated from Colby College in 2021.  The Batwoman episode was filmed in 2021 in Vancouver, quite a distance.  Besides, this Sawyer is currently  Operations Director for U.S. senator Angus King (Independent).  I doubt that he is doing much acting or stuntwork on the side.

More after the break