Movies

Reviews of recent movies, with a few from before 2020, looking for gay characters, gay subtexts, and other queer codes.  Most have nude photos of the male cast members..

Some Lists:

The top 18 gay-positive comedy movies: Bill and Ted, Jay and Silent Bob, zombies, pixies, time travelers, and Adam Devine in love

The top 16 gay-positive science fiction, fantasy, and paranormal movies, plus two with egregious queerbaiting.

A

28 Years Later: The Bone Temple: A cured zombie, the Devil's son, a Jimmy cult, dongs, and 8 gay actors.

After the Hunt: Pretentious philosophy professors have problems, with some p*eises and Will Price

Almost Love: Almost good gay comedy about rich people's hookup problems, plus Scott Evans nude.

American Gigolo, 1980 and 2022: Frontal nudity and homophobia, or underwear shots and gay erasure?

Angels and Insects: Recalling the cringe cocks

Angels in America: Tearjerker about Mormon angels, AIDS, and some 1950s guy.

Arabian Nights: Pasolini tells the lesser-known tales, with penises and homophobia

Asteroid City: Bleak play within a play within a play, with one teensy gay kiss and Matt Dillon's dick

B

Bad Witch: The most overt gay subtext of the 2020s

The Binge: Skyler Gisondo's chest, two queer codes, some random naked guys, and queerbaiting

Bodies: Time travel, a gay couple, social commentary, and a naked guy

The Boys in the Band (2023): Any day that ends with a naked man is a good day

Breaking Fast: Gay Muslim gets dumped, finds a new boyfriend, shows his dick.

The Bride: The Top 14 Hunks, including Christian Bale, Peter Sarsgaard, and a lot of queerbaiting

Buddy: A homicidal unicorn and two queer-coded kids, but is there any buddy-bonding? With Topher Grace, Michael Shannon, and Sergey

Bullet Train: Eleven assassins, Brad Pitt, and queerbaiting on the train from Tokyo to Kyoto

C

The Canterbury Tales: Pasolini includes more gay characters and cocks than Chaucer imagined

Caravaggio's Shadow: As time goes by, the gay Baroque painter becomes more and more straight.

The Cat and the Moon: An almost canonical gay couple and a gay-subtext romance on the Mean Streets of New York

Christmas on Cherry Lane: Three families, including a gay couple, with a plot twist that you won't see coming

Christmas on Repeat: A Groundhog Day romcom with Matthew Lawrence and Peter Pan

Christmas on the Square: Disaster starring Dolly Parton, Christine Baranski, Treat Williams, and Josh Serrano

Cruising: Homophobic classic about sin, degradation, and dicks in a doomed gay world.

D

Dashing in December: Campy Christmas romcom with gay guys and a ranch that needs saving. Plus Neil Patrick Harris's butt.

The Dead Don't Die: By-the-numbers zombie apocalypse, with Josh O'Connor's dick

Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Greg's Last Straw. Cartoon mayhem with a few gay hints, at least one gay actor, and a pleasant absence of The Girl.

Disclosure Day: Incessant heterosexism as the aliens announce their existence, 26 years too late

Down Low: Netflix bait-and-switch movie that turns a hookup into something dark

E

Everybody's Talking about Jamie: A 16-Year Old Aspires to Drag Stardom

The Eyes of Tammy Faye: A gay positive light in the homophobic 1980s.

F

Falling for Christmas: Lindsay Lohan's Boyfriend Gets a Boyfriend in a Ski-Resort Romcom

The Feast of the Seven Fishes: Most of the Christmas tropes I hate, but I liked it anyway. With Skyler Gisondo

Fear Street 1978: Don't go near a summer camp

Final Destination: Blood Legacy: Death has a wacky sense of humor. With Travis Turner amd the gay guy from "Chucky"

The Final Girls: Psycho-slasher parody with two queer characters and Adam  Devine's bulge.

Fire Island (2022): Swishy, Asian, and fat guys face the world of "No fats, no femmes, no Asians"

Fire Island (2023): Myles Clohessy takes off his clothes, erases LGBT people from a movie set in a gay resort

G

Game Over, Man: Five minutes of Adam's divine dick.  What's not to like?

Get Out: And get some gay subtexts on the way.

Gladiator II: Not as homophobic as you think, and there are musclemen

H-I

Happiest Season: Christmas romcom with a lesbian couple, pansexual Patrick, Jake's junk, and Candy Cane Lane

Harrow: How do you solve a gay teenager's murder without promoting homophobia?

The Holiday Exchange: Immensely wealthy A-gays look for love.  Watch it with your grandmother.

In the Hand of Dante: Film noir about an original Dante manuscript, set in a 1950s-era 2001. And it gets more confusing.

It Ends with Us: Not a post-Apocalyptic thriller, a drama about a lady with clunky rings and a hunk named Atlas

It's a Wonderful Knife: Christmas psycho-slasher romcom with six queer characters and Depner dick

J-K

Jexi: Dull romcom enlivened by Adam Devine's comedic timing and penis

Join Kelvin's God Squad: Homoerotic video starring Adam Devine, Tony Cavalero, and Brock O'Hurn

L

The bodybuilders behind The  Last Man Down: A dentist, a quidditch champ, a dentist, a big brother, a queer actor

Like Cattle Towards Glow: The mystery of the glowing cattle solved.  With Nicolas Hau tree-trunking, a naked man, and unrelenting gloom

Lost Boys: Music video by Phoebe Bridgers, with Skyler Gisondo escaping to Middle Earth, or not, plus the boyfriend's dick and two nude extras

The Lost Bus: Why did my partner choose this verkockten angst-fest for movie night? With McConaughey dick, ten hunks, and "Que sera, sera"

Love Lies Bleeding: Lesbian noir in the New Mexico desert, with some musclemen and bodybuilders

M

Meet Me in St. Louis: the movie that spawned the "Have Yourself" monstrosity. With A LOT of cocks to get you through it

Meet Me Next Christmas: Romcom with a drag show, a queer cousin, Pentatonix, and a dancer's dick

Men: Naked men and paranormal peril in a quaint English village. What could go wrong? You'd be surprised.

Mike and Nick and Nick and Alice: Time traveling gangsters, a cannibal assassin, a gay party, Jimmy Tatro, and Arturo's d*ck

N-O

Next Friday: Homophobes Create an Interracial Gay Romance

Obliterated: Do you want a review of "the worst movie of the year," or should I just skip to the dicks?

Onward: Not Your Grandfather's Teen Nerd Movie

Operation Taco Gary's: A gay porn star, Keefe, the "American Pie" guy, the cock that got censored, tacos, and aliens.

The Outlaws: Adam Devine has a crush on Pierce Brosnan.  Don't you?

Oz, the Great and Powerful: A walking penis (not in a good way) finds true love, two wicked witches, and a flying monkey

P-Q

The Package: A movie about penises, with bonus penises, produced by Adam Devine What could go wrong?

Pain and Glory: An aging director recalls his first crush and first boyfriend, with nudity and nostalgia

The Parenting: Gay couple meets the parents and a demon. With Logan Roy and Brandon Flynn

The People We Hate at the Wedding: Two sisters and their mum find love, the gay guy doesn't, and there's just one penis

Picco: A lot of nude guys amid the brutality of a German youth prison

Pitch Perfect: Nerd Ben Platt, hunk Skyler Astin, jerk Adam Devine, and some nude dudes

Pizza Movie: A surreal update of the teen nerd genre, with no heterosexism or homophobia, lots of butts, and Daniel Radcliffe as a butterfly

Playdate: Paul Blart plays with Reacher, his gay son with a mysterious super-strong boy. With plot holes...um, I mean plot twists, sci-fi, and teenage romance

Please Don't Destroy. The Treasure of Foggy Mountain: Enough queer codes and dick pics?  With a random Adam Devine butt

Poltergeist: The gay connecton, with gay actors, AIDS awareness, skeletons, some dicks, and "They're he-ee-ere."

Proper Gym Etiquette: Robert Oberst punishes those jerks you see at the gym.

R

Reefer Madness: Marijuana hysteria, demonic bulges, a dinner date with Satan, and Christian Campbell's cock

Richie Rich joins a gym. With bonus Rory and Kieran cocks, and Kelvin Gemstone comics.

S

Saltburn: Brideshead Revisted for the post-gay generation, with kink and penises

The Seminarian: Gay evangelical with an enormous penis looks for love, annoys his friends and the viewers

Sinners: Twin brothers fight vampires and klansmen in the Mississippi Delta.

Son of a Thousand Men: Magic realism from Brazil with fragmented time and space, but there are gay guys and dicks

Spider-Man: Brand New Day: Spidey bulges, visits a bathhouse, and brings a guy flowers. But it's not what you think.

Spider-Man: The Dark Age: Fan-based Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man doesn't get a girl

Splitting Adam: Tony Cavalero helps Jace Norman win the Girl of His Dreams, with the stars all grown up

Stonewall: The riot that began the Gay Rights Movement, with nice cops, a white Saviour, and some dicks.

Superman (2025): You'll believe a man can queerbait

Sweethearts: Thanksgiving romcom proving that there's gay life and cocks in Ohio, so don't move to New York

T-V

The Testament of Ann Lee: The origin of the Shakers, with a female Christ, energetic dancing, gay guys, and a lot of male nudity

This F*king Town: F*king gay-free Hollywood, with some celebs that I hooked up with...um, I mean met.

This is the End: Celebrities left behind face demons, cannibals, and Danny McBride

Time Cut: Girl travels into the past to stop a murder, with Griffin Gluck's boyfriend and Zane Philips' dick

Time Freak: Skyler Gisondo and Asa Butterfield as boyfriends who get girlfriends

Tropic Thunder: Danny McBride, a gay rapper, Jack Black's bulge, and a lot of wartime buddy-bonding

Twilight Saga: The top 15 hunks, with some naked vampires and werewolves

Underground Railroad: A gay slave rides a real railroad through the surrealist South

Vacation: Skyler Gisondo as a victim in a cringy homophobic scene, with adult penises to make up for it.

W-Z

Wake Up Dead Man: Daniel Craig's gay detective solves a locked-room murder, with a hot priest, some MAGA suspects, and a lot of Catholic cocks

Warm Bodies: A zombified Nicholas Hoult meets the Girl of His Dreams. With Nick Conddrey nude

Weapons: Mysterious disappearances, a positive gay couple, a scary clown lady, a femme boy, and a lot of nude dudes. What's not to like?

Weird Science, the movie and tv show: three gay-subtext couples, two gay-vague guys, and a lot of bulges and butts. Plus Lee's dick.

Werewolf Castle: Mostly Gay Actors, Mostly Shirtless Scenes, and a Dead Wife

What You Wish For: Nick Stahl plays a gay-ish chef who discovers what's on the menu. With two n*de Ecuadorian dudes

Why Him: Adam Devine hooks up with Griffin Gluck over discussions of jizz

Xanadu: A million lights are dancing

X-Men: Apocalypse: Assimilationist and separatist LGBT camps in a gay-free Marvel Cinematic Universe movie.