"Thanks again for inviting me to Thanksgiving dinner with your family," Kelvin, son of world-famous megachurch pastor Eli Gemstone and youth pastor at the Salvation Center, told his boyfriend Keefe as the "Welcome to Richmond Hill" sign appeared. It was an elegant suburb of Savannah, new-looking, with trendy shops and cool-sounding restaurants like the Himalayan Curry Cafe.
"Well, you invited me to dinner with the Gemstones last year," Keefe, a reformed Satanist turned assistant youth pastor, said. "So it's only fair to make you endure my family's craziness. Have you been studying the family tree?"
"I have it memorized. Your Mama, Beth. Don't ask about your Daddy. Your sister Liz, age 45, and her husband Henry. She's a child psychologist, and he's a dentist. Henry's son from his first marriage, Austin, who teaches high school English, and his wife...um..."
"Becky."
"Right, Becky. Liz and Henry have another son, Jimmy, age 8. Boy, I hope our heart-healthy green bean casserole will be enough."
"It will be fine. No one in my family eats heart-healthy anyway."
"Ok, who else...Your uncle might be coming. He's gay, but you only found out a couple of years ago. He was closeted when you were growing up." He paused. "You don't mind letting them think that you're just the assistant youth pastor? I'm not ashamed of us or anything...it's just...well, I'm a Gemstone."
"I don't mind," Keefe said, lying a little. It took the family years to accept him -- his sister still didn't like to talk about it much -- and now he had to hide? Pretend that the love of his life was a buddy? It felt wrong.
But Kelvin was always skittish. He didn't even realize that he was gay until he was over 30. Everyone else knew the moment they saw him in one of his flamboyant outfits. Keefe suspected that he would prefer to identify as a masculine-presenting demiboy, but they could save the gender-identity conversation for later. Much, much later.
They drove through a neighborhood that Keefe though dismal and repressive growing up. A grey house, grey with black shutters, where as a teenager he listened to heavy metal music and wrote poety about suicide, where his Daddy complained that everything he said or did was "faggy."
As they drove up to the house, Mama and his little nephew Jimmy came out onto the porch to meet them. Hugs all around.
After a "Nice to meet you," Jimmy disappeared with their overnight bags, but Mama kept her hands firmly attached to Kelvin's arm. "Reverend Gemstone, it's such a pleasure to have you in my home! I wanted to thank you in person for all you've done for my boy. But, you know, I've never seen him sing on the 'Praise Be to He' hour. He has a wonderful voice, you know."
"That's not really my decision, Ma'am," Kelvin said, although actually it was.
"Mama!" Keefe exclaimed. "You're embarrassing me."
"No, I'm not. But listen to me rattling on. You must be tired after your trip. The men are watching football in the study. You can join them, if you like. Or would you like to go up to your room and relax until dinner?" She pulled them into the foyer, said "Let me just take this ice chest to the kitchen," and vanished.
Keefe had no interest in sports, but he figured that the game would be the safest, and steered Kelvin to the study. His brother-in-law Henry on the recliner. His nephew Austin on the couch...and sitting next to him...what the heck was he doing here?
"Keefe, baby, I've been waiting for you!" His ex-boyfriend leapt to his feet and hugged him. He looked very different from when they were dating, much more conservative, not at all like the boy who flew too close to the sun (that was actually Icarus, not Daedalus, but they were really high when they came up with their nicknames).
His arms around Keefe, his tight, hard body pressing against him, brought back memories of a thousand nights with the band, performing, getting cruised by fanboys, dreaming of stardom...and a thousand nights in the bedroom after, Daedalus gently stroking his hair while Keefe went down on him. Kelvin was not at all gentle -- he was a roaring lion in bed, laying waste to his body with a passion so intense that it was a little frightening.
"Um..hi...Daedalus..." Keefe said, reddening as he began to get aroused. "I haven't seen you since..."
"The night you broke my heart?" He broke away and laughed. "Just kidding." He turned to Kelvin and held out his hand. "And this must be your happily-ever-after guy."
"What?" Kelvin pretended to be surprised. No, I'm Kelvin Gemstone, the youth pastor at the Salvation Center, Keefe's boss....and housemate. Church staff has to live on the estate, you see, and I had a spare room...." Stop lying! Keefe thought savagely. You're sounding more and more ridiculous.
Daedalus looked more closely. "Oh, right, I remember you from the night you broke up Baby Queef's performance at Club Sinister. You should have seen him, Henry -- we had Keefe in this isolation tank that symbolized the womb, right, and Indiana Jones here comes splashing in, tearing off the tubes that brought him oxygen, hugging him, kissing him -- the guy's mouth was full of amniotic fluid, mind you -- and whispering 'I love you. I love you.'...do you do that for all of your 'housemates,' Kelv Baby?"
"It was part of the act. We arranged it in advance," Kelvin said, lying again to save face -- and to avoid admitting that it was the moment when he realized that he was in love with Keefe. An important moment! One you should want to share.
"Sounds exciting," Henry said. "You should have taped it."
"Um...excuse me. I need to give Mama directions on how to prepare our casserole." He ran into the kitchen. "Mama! Why on Earth did you invite my ex-boyfriend to Thanksgiving Dinner?"
She frowned. "Well, why not? Daedalus came to every Thanksgiving and Christmas for five years. And your nephew Austin's piano recitals. Jimmy called him 'Uncle Daedus.'" He's part of the family. Just because you broke up for some crazy reason doesn't mean we have to break up with him, too."
"I found God, Mama! Isn't that what you wanted for me?"
"All I ever wanted was for you to be happy. And you were happy with Daedalus. A lot happier than you seem now, when every word I say makes you uncomfortable or angry, and the wonderful Reverend Gemstone treats you like his personal servant. Now, does this casserole get onion rings on top, or not?"
More after the break
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