Monday, November 20, 2023

My Boyfriend and My Satanist Ex-Boyfriend at Thanksgiving Dinner: A Kelvin/Keefe/Daedalus Story

 


"Thanks again for inviting me to Thanksgiving dinner with your family," Kelvin, son of world-famous megachurch pastor Eli Gemstone and youth pastor at the Salvation Center,  told his boyfriend Keefe as the "Welcome to Richmond Hill" sign appeared.  It was an elegant suburb of Savannah, new-looking, with trendy shops and cool-sounding restaurants like the Himalayan Curry Cafe.

"Well, you invited me to dinner with the Gemstones last year,"  Keefe, a reformed Satanist turned assistant youth pastor, said.  "So it's only fair to make you endure my family's craziness.  Have you been studying the family tree?"


"I have it memorized.  Your Mama, Beth.  Don't ask about your Daddy.  Your sister Liz, age 45, and her husband Henry.  She's a child psychologist, and he's a dentist. Henry's son from his first marriage, Austin, who teaches high school English, and his wife...um..."

"Becky."

"Right, Becky.  Liz and Henry have another son, Jimmy, age 8.  Boy, I hope our heart-healthy green bean casserole will be enough."

"It will be fine.  No one in my family eats heart-healthy anyway."

"Ok, who else...Your uncle might be coming.  He's gay, but you only found out a couple of years ago.  He was closeted when you were growing up."  He paused.  "You don't mind letting them think that you're just the assistant youth pastor? I'm not ashamed of us or anything...it's just...well, I'm a Gemstone."  

"I don't mind," Keefe said, lying a little.  It took the family years to accept him -- his sister still didn't like to talk about it much -- and now he had to hide?  Pretend that the love of his life was a buddy?  It felt wrong.  

But Kelvin was always skittish.  He didn't even realize that he was gay until he was over 30. Everyone else knew the moment they saw him in one of his flamboyant outfits.  Keefe suspected that he would prefer to identify as a masculine-presenting demiboy, but they could save the gender-identity conversation for later.  Much, much later.


They drove through a neighborhood that Keefe though dismal and repressive growing up.  A grey house, grey with black shutters, where as a teenager he listened to heavy metal music and wrote poety about suicide, where his Daddy complained that everything he said or did was "faggy."

As they drove up to the house, Mama and his little nephew Jimmy came out onto the porch to meet them.   Hugs all around.

After a "Nice to meet you," Jimmy disappeared with their overnight bags, but Mama kept her hands firmly attached to Kelvin's arm.   "Reverend Gemstone, it's such a pleasure to have you in my home! I wanted to thank you in person for all you've done for my boy. But, you know, I've never seen him sing on the 'Praise Be to He' hour.  He has a wonderful voice, you know."

"That's not really my decision, Ma'am," Kelvin said, although actually it was.

"Mama!" Keefe exclaimed.  "You're embarrassing me."

"No, I'm not.  But listen to me rattling on.  You must be tired after your trip.  The men are watching football in the study.  You can join them, if you like.  Or would you like to go up to your room and relax until dinner?"  She pulled them into the foyer, said "Let me just take this ice chest to the kitchen," and vanished.

Keefe had no interest in sports, but he figured that the game would be the safest, and steered Kelvin to the study.  His brother-in-law Henry on the recliner.  His nephew Austin on the couch...and sitting next to him...what the heck was he doing here?


"Keefe, baby, I've been waiting for you!"  His ex-boyfriend leapt to his feet and hugged him.  He looked very different from when they were dating, much more conservative, not at all like the boy who flew too close to the sun (that was actually Icarus, not Daedalus, but they were really high when they came up with their nicknames). 

 His arms around Keefe, his tight, hard body pressing against him, brought back memories of a thousand nights with the band, performing, getting cruised by fanboys,  dreaming of stardom...and a thousand nights in the bedroom after, Daedalus gently stroking his hair while Keefe went down on him.  Kelvin was not at all gentle -- he was a roaring lion in bed, laying waste to his body with a passion so intense that it was a little frightening.

"Um..hi...Daedalus..." Keefe said, reddening as he began to get aroused.  "I haven't seen you since..."

"The night you broke my heart?"  He broke away and laughed.  "Just kidding."  He turned to Kelvin and held out his hand.  "And this must be your happily-ever-after guy."

"What?" Kelvin pretended to be surprised.  No, I'm Kelvin Gemstone, the youth pastor at the Salvation Center, Keefe's boss....and housemate.  Church staff has to live on the estate, you see, and I had a spare room...."  Stop lying! Keefe thought savagely.  You're sounding more and more ridiculous.


Daedalus looked more closely.  "Oh, right, I remember you from the night you broke up Baby Queef's performance at Club Sinister. You should have seen him, Henry -- we had Keefe in this isolation tank that symbolized the womb, right, and Indiana Jones here comes splashing in, tearing off the tubes that brought him oxygen, hugging him, kissing him -- the guy's mouth was full of amniotic fluid, mind you -- and whispering 'I love you. I love you.'...do you do that for all of your 'housemates,' Kelv Baby?"

"It was part of the act.  We arranged it in advance," Kelvin said, lying again to save face -- and to avoid admitting that it was the moment when he realized that he was in love with Keefe.  An important moment!  One you should want to share.

"Sounds exciting," Henry said. "You should have taped it."

"Um...excuse me.  I need to give Mama directions on how to prepare our casserole."  He ran into the kitchen.  "Mama!  Why on Earth did you invite my ex-boyfriend to Thanksgiving Dinner?"

She frowned.  "Well, why not?  Daedalus came to every Thanksgiving and Christmas for five years.  And your nephew Austin's piano recitals. Jimmy called him 'Uncle Daedus.'" He's part of the family.  Just because you broke up for some crazy reason doesn't mean we have to break up with him, too."

"I found God, Mama! Isn't that what you wanted for me?"

"All I ever wanted was for you to be happy.  And you were happy with Daedalus.  A lot happier than you seem now, when every word I say makes you uncomfortable or angry, and the wonderful Reverend Gemstone treats you like his personal servant.  Now, does this casserole get onion rings on top, or not?"

More after the break


Dinner went fine, with the usual political and religious debates and catching up on everyone's lives during the year.  

There were just three glitches.  When they went around the table and said what they were thankful for, Kelvin said "I'm thankful to be with my best friend and his family."  Keefe didn't like that, so he said "I'm thankful to be with the people I love," and looked directly at Kelvin.  No one seemed to notice.

Second glitch: Mama and Liz kept up the "let our boy sing" pressure: "It's great that you made Keefe a youth pastor, when he has no theological training and no experience working with kids, but you know, he has a degree in music!  You should hear his 'Ave Maria."

"Mama, I never once sang 'Ave Maria.'"  

"Ok, then.  I don't know -- 'It's Raining Men'?"

"Did Keefe tell you that he was in a band?" Liz asked.

"It was a heavy metal band.  I mostly screamed 'Hail Satan.'"

"And 'Black Lives Matter' and 'Love is Love,'" Daedalus added.  "We were a woke heavy metal band."


Third glitch: Daedalus got nostalgic about their days in Satan's Baby -- just three years ago, but he made it sound like the distant past.  'But you have to grow up. I've got a nice, stable job now, and I just signed the papers for a house in Charleston.  All I need is that special guy to share my life with.  Get married, adopt some kids."  He looked directly at Keefe.  No one seemed to notice.

After dinner, Liz, Henry, and Jimmy went home.  The others lived far away, so they had to stay over (no, a hotel was out of the question).  Mama made the arrangements: Austin and Becky on the fold-out couch in the study; "Reverend Gemstone" on the twin bed in Liz's old room, now used to store Mama's beanie baby collection; and Keefe and Daedalus on the double bed in his own room.  "Don't worry," Keefe whispered, "I'll sneak out and join you after everyone falls asleep."  But before that, he would be sharing a bed with his ex-boyfriend, who slept in the nude.

"This is nice, isn't it?" Daedalus said, climbing into bed.  Keefe, wearing three layers, turned his back on him and kept his eyes on his old Megadeth poster and away from Daedalus' super-sized cock.



"Like old times," he admitted.  I remember looking at that Megadeth poster a lot when you were inside me."  Daedalus always liked to top Keefe lying on his side, so he could reach around and fondle  his cock,  More often than not, he finished before Daedalus.  He grinned, in spite of himself.  "Hey.remember the time I forgot to bring lube, and we had to sneak some cooking oil from the kitchen?"

"Not a problem tonight.  I brought lube."  His hand reached around and pulled Keefe's cock from beneath the three layers. He became aroused, almost instantly.

"Wait...um...Daedalus, I'm not really in the mood, if you don't mind."

Daedalus moved away.  "I've never known you to not be in the mood, Dude.  What's wrong?  I'm not still in love with you, if that's what you're worried about.  Just two old friends reliving some special nights."  He pulled Keefe around and kissed him, rubbing their erect cocks together.  

"Ok, sure...just...I have to go to the bathroom first."  He ran out the door.  Liz's old room was down the hall, next to the bathroom.  He rushed in without knocking.  Kelvin was sitting up in bed, playing on his ipad amid the countless rows of beanie babies.

"Is everything ok, Brother?" he asked.

"Yes...I mean, no.  Everything is not ok. Not ok at all.   I'm sharing a bed with my ex-boyfriend, and the man I love is calling me 'brother.'"  

"You had a boyfriend before me?"  Kelvin looked shocked, as if somehow that was a betrayal.

"Well, of course."  Keefe found the question oddly annoying. He came out at age 15, and met Kelvin at age 33.  Was he supposed to sit at home all those years, waiting for a televangelist's son that he had seen on tv but never actually met?   "I dated Daedalus for five years.  We broke up a few months before I met you."

He squeezed into the bed, and Kelvin wrapped his arms around him. "Sorry.   I should have known that. I'm the most self-involved guy in the world, but even I noticed how Daedalus looked at you."

 "I don't know why Mama invited him, or really I do know why, she wants us to get back together again.  She won't back off unless I tell her that I'm in love with someone else, and it's the best thing that ever happened to me, but I have to keep it hidden,"

"Shh...it will be ok. This is all on me, not on you.  I want to tell people, I want to shout it to the whole world, but I'm just not strong enough to come out.  Is it really that bad if just the two of us know that I love you?"   Then they were kissing -- not one of Daedalus's soft, sweet kisses, but hard, demanding. Kelvin was in charge, and going to take what he wanted. And what he wanted was Keefe -- the most beautiful man in the world wanted him!   His hands and mouth were everywhere, fondling, kissing, prodding.  "I love you!" he gasped.  Kelvin growed.  A lion in bed.

Keefe pushed down between his legs -- Kelvin was not huge, but beautiful, standing fully erect like a stone monumnet.   He was forceful in oral, too, shoving Keefe's head into position and then down until he gagged.  It felt like everything that was Kelvin -- his body, his heart, his soul -- was pushing inside him.

Suddenly the door flew open.   He couldn't see from his position, but he knew his Mama's voice.  "Reverend Gemstone, Austin wanted me to warm up the leftover blueberry pie.  Would you like...oh, excuse me."  The door shut again.

They moved under the covers, a second too late. "Doesn't anybody in this house ever knock?" Keefe exclaimed.

"Did she see anything?" 

"The fifteenth and sixteenth thing I love about you, probably.  But don't worry, Mama caught me and Daedalus a few times.She won't tell anyone.  Do you still want to do it, or are you too embarrassed?"

"Um...maybe I could just hold you for awhile?"

"Sure." Keefe lay his head on Kelvin's chest and felt strong arms envelop him.  

A few minutes later, someone actually knocked.  It was Daedalus, wearing only boxer shorts, carrying his overnight bag and a pillow.  "Kelv, you should have said something.  Now I feel bad for trying to bone your boy."

"You were what?" Kelvin asked.  "Keefe, you didn't mention that part..."

"Anyway, Mama Chambers ejected me.  She said that I should sleep in the beanie baby room, and you two can have the big bed in Keefe's old room -- as your honeymoon suite, I guess. Oh, and Kelv, Baby, there's blueberry pie downstairs, to welcome you to the family."

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