Spider-Man: Brand New Day: Spidey bulges, visits a bathhouse, and brings a guy flowers. But it's not what you think.

 Marvel Cinematic Universe movies are not great at LGBT representation, and for some reason Spider-man movies are the worst of the lot: "Like all stories, and I mean every single story that has ever been told from Gilgamesh on to the present, including Death in Venice, The City and the Pillar, Call Me By Your Name, and Heartstopper, this story is about a boy and a girl."   So I went into Spider-Man: Brand New Day expecting to hear "feminine smiles are the meaning of life!" every few minutes.

I wasn't wrong.

There are three plotlines that actually could be three separate movies.

Plot #1: In the last movie, Spidey, aka Peter Parker (Tom Holland), zapped the memories of his True Love MJ and buddy Ned to "keep them safe."  Now he's living as a full-time superhero, ignoring the advice of his supervisor and the superhero Black Widow that he should get a girlfriend. 

Suddenly his powers start accelerating, giving him Hulk-style Roid Rage, but his web things fail to work at the most awkward moments.  He needs a device to inhibit some of his spider DNA while allowing the rest of it to keep giving him superpowers.  So he seeks out Incredible Hulk Bruce Banner (Mark Ruffalo, left), who teaches at Empire State University.

Hulky has lost his True Love.

Cliche alert: His Advanced Physics class is held in a giant lecture hall, like all college classes in movies.

Plot #2: 

After interrogating the various people who helped the Supervillain Scorpion (Michael Mando) escape, Spidey realizes that they're dealing with a being who can jump from mind to mind, peering into their memories and controlling their actions.  They're interested in getting access to a secret vault at the Damage Control headquarters (where they clean up the damage caused by superhero fights, including a lot of superpower-enhancing detritus).  

Eventually the being occupies the mind of Spidey's True Love MJ, and threatens to kill her unless he helps with their goal.  But some of the stuff at Damage Control could kill millions of people, so Spidey refuses.

More after the break, with a spoiler and a cock.

"Stuart Fails to Save" two Brian Smiths and two Josh Brenners. One is gay-ish, one has j/o photos, one went to Harvard, and one is Santa Claus.

I didn't watch The Big Bang Theory (2007-2019) much; the girl-crazy horniness and casual homophobia were too annoying.  But I liked the prequel Young Sheldon (2017-2024), so I decided to give the spin-off Stuart Fails to Save the Universe (2026) a try: 

Stuart (Kevin Sussman), who owned the guys' comic book hangout, and his scoobies zap between parallel worlds, trying to fix the interdimensional transport device that threatens to destroy the universe.

After an episode and a half, I had enough.  The parallel worlds were dull, the jokes unfunny, and the guys spent too much time discussing their failures with women.  Stuart's side quest is to convince the Woman of His Dreams that they were destined to be together, so she should dump her arrogant jock boyfriend.

But I liked the guys shopping at the comic book store in each episode, Zack (Brian J. Smith, left) and Trevor (Josh Brenner). 

Plus, when I checked for nude photos, I scored with Brian (j/o photo after the break).

Brian J. Smith was born in Dallas in 1981, and received a B.A. from Collin College and a M.F.A. in drama from Juliard.  He has a number of theatrical credits, including A Clockwork Orange, The Glass Menagerie, and  Good Boys and True.  

His on-screen career begins with Hate Crime (2005), playing a gay man who is victimized by his next-door neighbor, son of a fundamentalist preacher.

A nice beginning, buddy. 

Stargate Universe (2011-13): Soldiers and civilians are trapped on a spaceship "billions of light years from Earth."  Brian plays Lt. Matthew Scott, second in command.  He's religious and straight, with several past and present girlfriends.

Sens8 (2015-18): A science fiction drama about eight strangers who share a psychic connection: they can actually zap into each other's consciousness.  At one point they have a giant orgy.  Brian plays Will Gorski, a Chicago police officer.  He is straight (except for the orgy), and gets a girlfriend.

Class of '09 (2023) refers to the FBI agents who graduated from Quantico in 2009, tracing their lives to the present (2023/2025) and future (2034). Brian plays Daniel Lennix, who becomes FBI Associate Deputy Director in "the present" and is retired in "the future."   He has a wife.

Ok, I found one: Haze (2024): A journalist (Cole Dolman, top) leaves rehab to return to his home town.  He hooks up with a local guy (Brian) while being depressed and investigating dark secrets.

Brian also directed A House is not a Disco (2024): "The present-day life experiences of those who live, work, and pursue a season of pleasure in the world's most radically queer, "homo-normative" community: Fire Island Pines.

Two gay characters and director of a gay documentary.  Not bad, but not great.  Let's see if the guy is gay in real life:

More after the break.  Caution: Explicit.

Five things I like and five that I don't like about "My Brother, the Minotaur." #5 involves butts and Ely d*ck

 

My Brother the Minotaur (2026) is an Irish animated series about a minotaur boy named Lorcan (voiced by Ely Solan, left) being raised by humans.

In Greek mythology, the Minotaur is a monster, the offspring of Pasiphaë and a bull, hidden away in the Labyrinth and fed human youth, but here minotaurs are humanoid beings with massive torsos and bull-horns.

Lorcan's questions about his heritage become urgent as he enters his teen years, and begins experiencing rage, sudden horn hardening (symbolic of something or other), and disturbing nightmares.  Meanwhile, strange things are happening in the village.

After watching several episodes, here is my evaluation:

Things I dislike:

1. Lorcan's main ally is his younger brother Charlie.  Making him a brother rather than a friend removes any possibility of gay subtext, even after they rescue each other, say "I'm not leaving without you," and so on.  

2. The boys have two female friends, Dana and Harper.  They don't express any romantic interest in the episodes I watched, but they may in the future.

3. The background players are entirely heteronormative. The boys have male-female parents and grandparents.  In crowd scenes, it's always male-female couples, never same-sex pairs.  Even in the school cafeteria, every table is occupied by boy-girl couples.

4. Leisure pursuits are entirely gender-polarized.  The boys' room is filled with stereotypic boys' toys.  In a later episode, we see a doll that Lorcan played with as a baby.

5. Antagonist Craignelder is an old-fashioned moustache-twirling melodrama villain, who wants Lorcan locked up because he's a bigot, and wants to buy the dad's coffee shop just to be mean, mwah-ha-ha. Wait -- isn't that doing the guy a favor?  He's also a femme stereotype, with ascot and ostantatious ring.

Left: Antagonist Craignelder is played by Michael Sheen.

Five things I liked after the break

Rooster Episode 1.1: Trashy novelist at an elite college, hetero romance problems, a gay sidekick, Dunster dick, and the guy from "Scrubs"

 

Robert Heinlein once complained that science fiction was about exploring the vastness of time and space, while mainstream fiction -- the Rabbit Runs, Appointments in Samarra, and  Complaining Portnoys of our college lit classes -- was about men who hate their jobs and their wives.  "For Heaven's sake, get new jobs, get new wives, and shut the f*k up."

I am reminded of that quote when I think of the works of Steve Carrell:  Anchorman, Dan in Real Life,  The 40 Year Old Virgin, Cafe Society,  Date Night, Dinner for Schmucks, The Morning Show, The Four Seasons, all about little men trying desperately to find meaning in jobs and wives that they hate. Coincidentally, this is precisely the "job, house, wife, kids" trajectory that I rebelled against growing up.

So I wasn't planning to watch the HBO MAX series Rooster (2026).  Then the promo showed a young man telling Steve, "nice washboard (abs)," referring to the hunk on the cover of his book.  Later he seems to become Steve's sidekick.  So Steve probably writes gay novels, and probably has a gay sidekick.  Enough potential to review Episode 1.

Scene 1:  Famous novelist Greg Russo (Steve) looks morose as he is escorted through the elegant Spanish Colonial campus of Ludlow College (actually the University of the Pacific, Stockton).  He sees a naked old guy, who waves -- but his escort, Eric (Myles Perez, left), doesn't see anyone.  A hallucination?

Eric tells him to wait here, then zones him out and refuses to speak anymore.  Fortunately, Professor Shepherd, who arranged his campus visit,  is just walking up. 

He's nervous -- he writes trashy beach novels, not literature: "Characters you like have sex, characters you don't like get shot in the face."  Why would elite college students want to see him?  

Scene 2: The reading, in a giant lecture hall.  The students criticize his protagonist, Rooster, for describing the Girl in food terms during their 17 sexual acts (18, if you count the blow job). Isn't that sexist?  

Russo counters that she is strong and powerful -- she rescues Rooster, remember? "But she takes off her bikini top to do it."   A jock praises that scene: "The Girl is smokin'!"  Hey, isn't he the gay sidekick?  I'm starting to suspect that I've been tricked.

Scene 3: Next Russo meets the College President (John C. McGinley, the homophobic, sexist jerk on Scrubs).  He strips to his underwear to show off his physique: "You're thinking, most college presidents are bookish shut-ins, but this guy is jacked!" He looks like the naked guy from earlier.  So it wasn't a hallucination, just a crazy act that would never happen on any real college campus.

They allude to a "sex scandal" involving Katie and Archie (not mentioned before), and the President offers Russo a job as Writer-in-Residence.  "But I didn't even go to college."  "Who cares?  It's over-rated."  Academic malaise at its snarkiest. 

Left: McGinley's butt

Scene 4:  Next stop: Another giant lecture hall, a lecture on French impressionism, Monet at Giverny.  It's Russo's daughter Katie, a professor of art history (and the sex scandal lady).  As the students leave, she notes that her Dad doesn't like interacting with other humans, so they can get extra credit for looking him in the eye and saying "I love you very much."  A student does it!

Next Katie points out that the college has asked Russo to do a reading a billion times; why agree now?  "Admit it -- you're checking up on me, to see if I'm ok after the sex scandal."  We finally find out what it is: her husband Archie dumped her for a grad student.  Hetero Romance Problem #1.  

She has no idea why. Everything was normal, and then she was moving into the dead hockey coach's house.   Everybody on campus knows, and keeps staring at her and asking questions.  And it's difficult to avoid running into him or his new girlfriend on a small campus.  She's about to crack.

She points them out, sitting on a park bench.  "The girlfriend isn't even hot.  She's like a regular person.  Why did he dump me for her?"  Maybe he liked her personality?

As Russo peeks through the bushes, husband Archie and the girlfriend leave, and a lesbian couple notice him.  They think he's a perv, har har.   He runs away as they film him.  

Spoiler alert: This is set up to have consequences, like Russo being arrested, or the job offer rescinded, but it is never mentioned again.

Scene 5: Russo stops at a convenience store for some water.  Tommy (Maximo Salas), the jock from earlier, praises the Rooster books. Uh-oh, he forgot his id, so Russo buys his beer for him.  If he's under 21, you're in big trouble, buddy.

More after the break

Charlie Ritter: John Ritter's grandson? Any on-screen roles? How many nude photos does it take to get through the girl-craziness?

 

When Charlie Ritter appeared on my Instagram recommendations, I assumed that he was the grandson of John Ritter, whose Jack Tripper pretended to be gay on Three's Company in the 1970s: the first time many of us had ever heard the word.  .

Grandson Charlie is obviously straight.  There are a few guy-hugging photos, but usually he's hugging, kissing, cuddling with, and frolicking with girls! girls! girls!

Just one girl, duck-lipping or peace-signing.

Two girls, one for each arm.

Four girls, two on his arms, one grabbing his shoulders, and the other on her knees for some reason.

When he goes to a museum, he photographs the statues of naked ladies.

Here he's just sitting in a restaurant.  Presumably being photographed by a girl, but none are visible...wait, there's one on the sidewalk outside. Even while sitting in a restaurant. You have to be within twenty feet of the Eternal Feminine at all times, don't you, Chuck Baby?

Come on, this is excessive, even for the Don Juan -- Casanova -- Arthur Fonzarelli of our generation.  How could you afford all the corsages?

At least he displays a nice physique, if you can find selfie shots, without the Girls! Girls! Girls!

You haven't seen most of the hugging, kissing, grabbing, pretending to strangle, duck-lipping, hand-holding, and boob-gazing, but I have, and I need a few cocks before going on to Charlie's acting career.

This might not be our Charlie, but I don't care.  I know where that cock has been.  Repeatedly.

More after the break

Mason McKenzie: From a fairy's dungeon to Poison Ivy, pickleball, Phi Psi and a physique. With Aidan, Mason, and the Hunter nude

 

Once Upon a Time, with the characters from all the Disney fantasy movies related in a complex genealogy, was almost entirely heterosexist.  There was a blink-and-you-miss-it lesbian romance (with the couple vanishing immediately after their kiss) and a few very brief gay-subtext romances. One of the most significant was between Gideon, son of the Rumpelstiltskin and Belle, and Roderick, his cellmate in the Black Fairy's dungeon.  They were played by Anton Starkman and Mason McKenzie as children, and Grayson Gabriel and Giles Mathey as adults.  

That's four actors to check.  

I've already profiled Anton Starkman.

Giles Matthey is extremely ugly, and straight.

There are too many Grayson Gabriels to find the actor.

That leaves Mason McKenzie.  At least he has a chest (above), a nice backside (left), and no tattoos to date.

Mason was born in 2005 in Barrie, Ontario, about an hour north of Toronto. After many tv commercials, he broke into scripted tv in two 2017 episodes of the soap When Calls the Heart, as the bullying nephew of evil railroad executive Jeremy Wyatt.  (Nikolas Ducik, left played his brother, Earl).

Then came the Once Upon a Time episode, a thriller, and two romcoms: Frozen in Love (2018) and Love Under the Rainbow (2019), not to be confused with Under the Rainbow, about the actors who played Munchkins in The Wizard of Oz. 

You played the kids of the romantic leads, not the guys themselves, but still, it's not looking good for your gay representation score, Mason Baby.

In a 2019 episode of Project Blue Book, UFO researcher Hynek (Aidan Gillen, right) handles the case of a scoutmaster who disappeared after his troop witnessed a UFO.  Was he abducted by the Men in Black? Mason plays one of the scouts.

Another Aidan dick.

In a  2020 episode of The Baby-Sitters' Club,  Mary-Anne is hesitant about approaching her crush, so one-shot gay character Alex (David Raynolds, not Reynolds) tells her about his crush on a boy at theater camp.  Mason plays Toby, one of his friends, but not the crush. 

More after the break

The Lost Bus: Why did my partner choose this verkockten angst-fest for movie night? With McConaughey dick, ten hunks, and "Que sera, sera"

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Fresh Off the Boat Episode 3.2: Musclemen flex, Walter is homophobic, Evan finds a new boyfriend, and Eddie is traumatized by cocks.

Since identifying Hudson Yang as "probably gay," I've been going through his tv series, Fresh Off the Boat, about a "fresh off the boat" Taiwanese-American family in the 1990s.  There are a number of recurring gay characters, but I'm looking for gay texts and subtexts among the sons, Eddie, Emery, and Evan.  Episode 3.2, "Breaking Chains" (2016) has some, plus beefcake and homophobia.

I'm skipping the A Plot, where Dad Louis (Randall Park) hires a housekeeper, thus insulting his wife Jessica, who thinks that he thinks she is a failure as a woman (because her gender identity is based on her ability to clean up?) 

In the B Plot, Eddie (Hudson Yang) and his friends are about to enter eighth grade, so they'll need either great gear or great stories.

Trent (Trevor Larcom) has great gear: he went to a theme park and got a scrunchie depicting the mascot.

Walter (Prophet Bolden) tells him that it "looks like a gay raindrop." 

 Homophobic comment, buddy.

Brian (Dash Williams) has a great story: he had mono, so he stayed inside watching Cinemax.  Now he knows a lot about boobs, and wants to become a pizza delivery boy.  Ugh, heteronormative girl-craziness.

Dave (Evan Hanneman) argues they don't need gear or stories, because they'll be eighth graders, practically upperclassmen.  Eddie (Hudson Yang) agrees: "We'll be men among boys!"  Sounds like their middle school covers grades 7-9, and high school grades 10-12.

Cut to a fantasy of the guys as grown-up musclemen flexing and grinning. I count six girls and one boy swooning over them -- but the one boy acknowledges the existence of LGBT people. 

Eddie's brother Emery is also impressed.  He gasps, "Who are those MEN?"

"Nah, son," Adult Eddie answers.  "We're eighth graders."

Ok, two boys are swooning over the musclemen.

In case you were wondering, Trent becomes Chris Kimball (below); Walter, Cleveland Berto, Dave, Colin Owens; and Eddie, Chen Tang (left)

Some dicks after the break

Carter Ryan: Canadian soap boy likes farm equipment, works out, hugs Jaiven and other hot guys. WIth Carter and Kevin cocks.

The teen idol site has numerous photos of Carter Ryan, aka Carter Ryan Evancic and another guy, visible in the background of this photo, and elsewhere hugging, swimming, working out, hugging, and hugging.  Surely they're boyfriends.  But first, to make sure that Carter is actually an actor, I'm checking out his IMDB biography.

Whew, it's long and overblown with superlatives.  The greatest actor of our generation was born in 2006 to Dorlyn and Carol Evancic.  Don't get excited -- Dorlyn is just a guy with a girl's name.   His older sister inspired him to start acting at the age of eight months.  Really? 

At the age of eight, Carter booked the Lead in a Feature Film (Mom's capitalization, not mine), playing the son of "supermodel/actress Rachel Hunt" in Her Infidelity (2015).

Wait -- is Rachel the extremely famous actress, or the character?

She's the actress.  In Her Infidelity (2015), Rachel plays a bored housewife who has an affair with a hunky teacher (Grayson Chitty), but he turns out to be a psycho.  Presumably Carter plays her son.

 

Getting through the descriptions of Carter's wonderfulness is quite a slog. Here's another photo of Carter and his boyfriend to combat the boredom.  

After Her Infidelity, the great actor (according to his Mom) appeared in:

An episode of Impastor (2015) as Young Buddy.  The grown-up Buddy, on the run from a loan shark, steals a man's identity and takes over as the new gay pastor of a small-town church.  This may be a problem, since he's not really qualified to be a leader in the local gay community. Besides, he's got a tattoo of a naked lady on his hand. 

An episode of Travelers (2016), with Will and Grace star Eric McCormack playing a straight guy who sends his consciousness back in time.  Carter's character is not mentioned in the plot synopsis.

Two episodes of The Man in the High Castle (2015-16), a dystopian series where Germany won World War II. Carter plays the son of a lady dating American resistance fighter Joe Blake (Luke Kleintank).

Left: Rupert Everett as resistance fighter Frank Frink.

But Carter is best known as Cody Stanton in the Canadian soap When Calls the Heart (2015-19) and the spin-off When Hope Calls (2021).

The Hoping Heart or The Calling Hope or whatever is set in a small town in Alberta in the 1910s.  Cody is homeless and hungry until he is adopted by Abigal Stanton, who runs the local cafe. His plotlines involve dealing with his sister's illness, dealing with his own illness, having trouble at school, and gay-subtext buddy-bonding with Robert Wolfe (Jaiven Natt).

Hey, Jaiven is the boyfriend! 

Off-camera, Carter buddy-bonded with several male cast members.  Here he wishes happy birthday to Daniel Issing, whom I assumed was a father figure on the show. But the actor is Kevin McGarry, who plays town constable Nathan Grant, with no particular connection to Cody.  Apparently Carter just likes hunky guys.

And who the heck is Daniel Issing?    

More after the break

Sawyer Nicholson: A dimly lit chest shot leads to Kit Connor, Colby College, a croc monster, Wally's cock, and two nude Sawyers

In Batwoman Episode 3.1, two college students sneak into an indoor swimming pool at night. Derek takes off his shirt and pants and tries to kiss the girl, but she playfully tosses him into the water.  He's under there for a long time.  Suddenly he emerges, being tossed around by an unknown force.  The pool fills with blood.   Turns out that he has been eaten by a newly-created crocodile monster.  

The monster takes the girl back to its lair to eat later, giving her a huge amount of screen time and a Batwoman rescue, while Derek is on-screen for like ten seconds and never interacts with the main cast.   Apparently tv writers can't imagine that a man would ever need rescuing.  They must be strong, powerful, in control; only women get to be damsels in distress.  Even in a show that has to date featured two kickass lesbian superheroes.   

We don't even get a clear picture of Derek during his ten seconds.  This photo is as clear as I could get,  and still half in shadow, there's a brief face shot -- which makes him look like Kit Connor of Heartstopper -- and the tossing-about is too fast for a good look.  

It's like the director has to film a pool scene, so the croc monster can get them, but wants to obscure Derek's body as much as possible.  The Girl is sequestered in a brightly-lit sewer, with everything clearly on display.

Dang it!  To assuage my disappointment over the Derek erasure, I'm going to research the actor, Sawyer Nicholson.  

He has four acting credits listed on the IMDB:

"Child in Meadow" in The Last Mimzy (2007)

Derek in Batwoman (2021).

Huge Football Player in How to Win a Popularity Contest (2026): Elle and her archnemesis Nate team up to win back their exes, and end up in love with each other.

And Walters in two episodes of Off Campus (2026), with Hannah using a jock (Belmont Cameli, left) to make her crush jealous.  I couldn't find him in the two episodes, and he's not mentioned in any synopsis.

Sawyer seems to be pursuing a career as a stunt performer.  He has 14 stunt credits, mostly from 2025 and 2026, including Tron: Ares and Playdate (which has gay subtexts), and episodes of Black Mirror, Upload, The Last of Us, and Every Year After.

He stunt doubled for Luke (Lachlan Quarmby), an "arrogant" rookie constable, in the Canadian police procedural Allegiance (2024-26).

And Wally (Milo Manheim), the ghost of a 1980s jock, on School Spirits.  So we can assume that this is Sawyer's butt.

But it's the real Milo's j/o video.

Next I'll check Sawyer's social media.

Problem: There's a female Sawyer Nicholson, a very famous runner who gets 99% of the google results, even when my search string ends with -female -girl -lady absolutely -ladies, men  only.  Piecing between them for Sawyer Nicholson male actor men only,  I found no online resumes, no newspaper or magazine articles, and only three social media sites:

A Sawyer Nicholson Male Actor Men Only  on Facebook is from Brunswick, Maine, and graduated from Colby College in 2021.  The Batwoman episode was filmed in 2021 in Vancouver, quite a distance.  Besides, this Sawyer is currently  Operations Director for U.S. senator Angus King (Independent).  I doubt that he is doing much acting or stuntwork on the side.

More after the break