Joey Beni: Bodybuilder appears in five gay tv shows with multiple nude scenes, so he's obviously gay, right?

 

I don't usually have good luck with the guys depicted on the celebrity cock subreddit.  It seems like they either appeared in one movie 15 years ago and have no social media presence, or they are very famous in Lithuania but have no movies or tv shows available to stream in the U.S.  But I'll give Joey Beni a try because he has an Instagram page, 22 acting credits, and a 2025 interview in VoyageLA, which features "LA's most inspiring stories."

His bio comes from the interview: Joey was born in San Diego in 1994.  His first acting gig was playing Aladdin in the San Diego Children's Theater. Later he moved to Florida and then to Virginia Beach, where he attended Tidewater Community College.  In 2006 he decided to become an actor, which means moving to L.A., so he saved up his  money for two years and drove out: "I had no friends, no family, and no job in LA. I was able to lock in an apartment over the phone so all I had was an address, my life savings, and a dream."  

He studied comedy with the Groundlings and acting at the Archibald Studio, and started auditioninng. 

 Joey wonders why his friends are getting acting roles so easily, and he is so often left behind.  Maybe you need more nude photos?   He got one job because the guy they cast had to drop out, so they asked him to substitute at the last minute. He complains that acting is 90% luck, 10% talent.

Not too inspiring, buddy.  Actually, you sound a little bitter.  

After 18 years in the business, Joey has some industrial videos (The Benefits of Sunscreen, Sexual Harassment in the Workplace), some tv commercials, a drug prevention PSA, and a dating show, The Hook-Up.

That last show sounds promising, but it was actually heterosexual only.  Joey's episode features contestant Ray using social media to choose from between "four lovely ladies."  

Those 22 acting credits listed on the IMDB are mostly small roles, often unnamed characters:

Contestant #1 in Youthful Days (2014), starring Bryan James as a guy with two personalities.

Hot Guy #1 in an episode of Go-Go Boy Interrupted (2016): Jimmy Fowlie stars as a "go-go boy" who is approaching 30 and aging out of the business, with no other marketable skills. Being hung won't get you a job staring at a computer screen in a cubicle.  Gay actor Brian Jordan Alvarez, Scott Evans, and Nick Adams appear, and Lynne Marie Stewart of Pee-Wee's Playhouse, who I thought was a drag queen until recently, played Go-Go's Mom.

The Other Cowboy in Country Thunder (2017).

In M.F.A. (2017), an art student turned vigilante, targeting rapists got away with it, like former teen idol Michael Welch, Kyle Pettis (left), and Joey.

Wedding Photographer in a 2022 episode of Days of Our Lives.

Sexy Man in a 2022 episode of DemonHuntr, featuring two gay guys whose side hustle is paranormal investigation.  Apparently they don't investigate many nude ghosts; only Joey (top photo)  and Jason Caceres (left) give us frontals.

Man in Bondage #1 in Babylon (2023), which I found too disgusting to get through.

More after the break

Five things I like and five that I don't like about "My Brother, the Minotaur." #5 involves butts and Ely d*ck

 

My Brother the Minotaur (2026) is an Irish animated series about a minotaur boy named Lorcan (voiced by Ely Solan, left) being raised by humans.

In Greek mythology, the Minotaur is a monster, the offspring of Pasiphaë and a bull, hidden away in the Labyrinth and fed human youth, but here minotaurs are humanoid beings with massive torsos and bull-horns.

Lorcan's questions about his heritage become urgent as he enters his teen years, and begins experiencing rage, sudden horn hardening (symbolic of something or other), and disturbing nightmares.  Meanwhile, strange things are happening in the village.

After watching several episodes, here is my evaluation:

Things I dislike:

1. Lorcan's main ally is his younger brother Charlie.  Making him a brother rather than a friend removes any possibility of gay subtext, even after they rescue each other, say "I'm not leaving without you," and so on.  

2. The boys have two female friends, Dana and Harper.  They don't express any romantic interest in the episodes I watched, but they may in the future.

3. The background players are entirely heteronormative. The boys have male-female parents and grandparents.  In crowd scenes, it's always male-female couples, never same-sex pairs.  Even in the school cafeteria, every table is occupied by boy-girl couples.

4. Leisure pursuits are entirely gender-polarized.  The boys' room is filled with stereotypic boys' toys.  In a later episode, we see a doll that Lorcan played with as a baby.

5. Antagonist Craignelder is an old-fashioned moustache-twirling melodrama villain, who wants Lorcan locked up because he's a bigot, and wants to buy the dad's coffee shop just to be mean, mwah-ha-ha. Wait -- isn't that doing the guy a favor?  He's also a femme stereotype, with ascot and ostantatious ring.

Left: Antagonist Craignelder is played by Michael Sheen.

Five things I liked after the break

"Dad Can't Know That I'm Gay": An Abraham Gemstone Adventure, with Ash, some twink d*cks, and a special appearance by Pontius and Stacy

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Rooster Episode 1.1: Trashy novelist at an elite college, hetero romance problems, a gay sidekick, Dunster dick, and the guy from "Scrubs"

 

Robert Heinlein once complained that science fiction was about exploring the vastness of time and space, while mainstream fiction -- the Rabbit Runs, Appointments in Samarra, and  Complaining Portnoys of our college lit classes -- was about men who hate their jobs and their wives.  "For Heaven's sake, get new jobs, get new wives, and shut the f*k up."

I am reminded of that quote when I think of the works of Steve Carrell:  Anchorman, Dan in Real Life,  The 40 Year Old Virgin, Cafe Society,  Date Night, Dinner for Schmucks, The Morning Show, The Four Seasons, all about little men trying desperately to find meaning in jobs and wives that they hate. Coincidentally, this is precisely the "job, house, wife, kids" trajectory that I rebelled against growing up.

So I wasn't planning to watch the HBO MAX series Rooster (2026).  Then the promo showed a young man telling Steve, "nice washboard (abs)," referring to the hunk on the cover of his book.  Later he seems to become Steve's sidekick.  So Steve probably writes gay novels, and probably has a gay sidekick.  Enough potential to review Episode 1.

Scene 1:  Famous novelist Greg Russo (Steve) looks morose as he is escorted through the elegant Spanish Colonial campus of Ludlow College (actually the University of the Pacific, Stockton).  He sees a naked old guy, who waves -- but his escort, Eric (Myles Perez, left), doesn't see anyone.  A hallucination?

Eric tells him to wait here, then zones him out and refuses to speak anymore.  Fortunately, Professor Shepherd, who arranged his campus visit,  is just walking up. 

He's nervous -- he writes trashy beach novels, not literature: "Characters you like have sex, characters you don't like get shot in the face."  Why would elite college students want to see him?  

Scene 2: The reading, in a giant lecture hall.  The students criticize his protagonist, Rooster, for describing the Girl in food terms during their 17 sexual acts (18, if you count the blow job). Isn't that sexist?  

Russo counters that she is strong and powerful -- she rescues Rooster, remember? "But she takes off her bikini top to do it."   A jock praises that scene: "The Girl is smokin'!"  Hey, isn't he the gay sidekick?  I'm starting to suspect that I've been tricked.

Scene 3: Next Russo meets the College President (John C. McGinley, the homophobic, sexist jerk on Scrubs).  He strips to his underwear to show off his physique: "You're thinking, most college presidents are bookish shut-ins, but this guy is jacked!" He looks like the naked guy from earlier.  So it wasn't a hallucination, just a crazy act that would never happen on any real college campus.

They allude to a "sex scandal" involving Katie and Archie (not mentioned before), and the President offers Russo a job as Writer-in-Residence.  "But I didn't even go to college."  "Who cares?  It's over-rated."  Academic malaise at its snarkiest. 

Left: McGinley's butt

Scene 4:  Next stop: Another giant lecture hall, a lecture on French impressionism, Monet at Giverny.  It's Russo's daughter Katie, a professor of art history (and the sex scandal lady).  As the students leave, she notes that her Dad doesn't like interacting with other humans, so they can get extra credit for looking him in the eye and saying "I love you very much."  A student does it!

Next Katie points out that the college has asked Russo to do a reading a billion times; why agree now?  "Admit it -- you're checking up on me, to see if I'm ok after the sex scandal."  We finally find out what it is: her husband Archie dumped her for a grad student.  Hetero Romance Problem #1.  

She has no idea why. Everything was normal, and then she was moving into the dead hockey coach's house.   Everybody on campus knows, and keeps staring at her and asking questions.  And it's difficult to avoid running into him or his new girlfriend on a small campus.  She's about to crack.

She points them out, sitting on a park bench.  "The girlfriend isn't even hot.  She's like a regular person.  Why did he dump me for her?"  Maybe he liked her personality?

As Russo peeks through the bushes, husband Archie and the girlfriend leave, and a lesbian couple notice him.  They think he's a perv, har har.   He runs away as they film him.  

Spoiler alert: This is set up to have consequences, like Russo being arrested, or the job offer rescinded, but it is never mentioned again.

Scene 5: Russo stops at a convenience store for some water.  Tommy (Maximo Salas), the jock from earlier, praises the Rooster books. Uh-oh, he forgot his id, so Russo buys his beer for him.  If he's under 21, you're in big trouble, buddy.

More after the break