Tristan Borders pushed up the queer codes as Young Kelvin Gemstone, but what about his other roles? With twink butt and Cleveland cock

  

For a long time, I've been wanting to do a profile of Tristan Borders, who played the young Kelvin in the flashback episodes of The Righteous Gemstones, and gave us so many intentional and unintentional clues to Kelvin's sexual identity -- more than Adam Devine himself, back when most fans were still yelling "He's not gay, just sensitive!"  

In the Season 2 flashback to 1993, four year old Kelvin has two dolls in his bedroom and a Muscle and Fitness cover taped to his wall (not this photo).

In the Season 3 Interlude, a flashback to the summer of 2000, eleven-year old Kelvin complains that his sister forces him to come to the mall with her, to act as a distraction while she shoplifts.  She also criticizes him for having "a tiny little doll pecker," starting an obsession with his size that will bedevil Kelvin through his life and, in 2023, make him reluctant to begin bedroom activities with his boyfriend Keefe.

Young Kelvin also wears a t-shirt with hibiscus flowers in the colors of the Pride Flag.

In the Season 4 Interlude, set in the summer of 2003, Young Kelvin is obviously gay, with a number of feminine mannerisms and an interest in teen idols.  He is a snob and a jerk, constantly denigrating his siblings and their friend Corey.  In a pivotal scene, he is alone in the house when Cobb breaks in to destroy things and steal the family heirloom Gold Bible.

Tristan doesn't have a social media presence, and there's no biographical information online, so all I can use for a profile are his other roles on the iMDB.

His career begins with two episodes of American Rust (2021), with a rust-belt police chief investigating the murder of flawed, troubled cop Pete Novick (Jim Frost, butt left).  Tristan plays Pete's son.

Then two episodes of The First Lady (2022), about three first ladies: Eleanor Roosevelt, Betty Ford, and Michelle Obama. Tristan plays John Roosevelt (1916-91), young son of Franklin (queer actor Charlie Plummer) and Eleanor (gay in real life).

More after the break

Asher Alexander: Brax's brother makes shrimp fudge, rides a drag queen train, plays a gay judge. With Brax and Brock cocks

 

Asher Alexander is the little brother of Braxton Alexander, who you know as a model, the college boy with the missing testicles on Free Bert, and  the gay kid on a flashback episode of The Righteous Gemstones: he rejects the vulgar advances of young Judy, so her brother Jesse retaliates; He hits the boy with a cymbal, then pantses him so the whole class can see his butt and penis...and laugh at him?  Or make it one of the iconic moments of their gay awakening?

 

It's was a stunt butt, of course, and we didn't see his penis.

 At least not until he turned 18.

Asher, born in March 2015, broke into on-screen acting with Adult Swim Yule Log 2: Branching Out (2024), a "meta comedy on the holiday horror and romcom genres."  Fleeing from the murderous yule log, Zoe and her gay buddy Jaxter (Chase Steven Allen) are trapped in the romcom town of Mistletoe, where she falls for struggling ornament shop owner Birl and his young son Jaxon (Asher).

She teaches Jaxon how to make shrimp fudge. Talk about horror!

No Good Deed (2024) is about three families, including a lesbian couple, competing to see who will be chosen to buy a house.  Well, it's a very nice house.  Asher plays the young Paul (Ray Romano).

Hal and Harper (2025) is a comedy miniseries featuring siblings who reminisce about their dysfunctional childhoods.  The adult actors play themselves as children.  I can't imagine how weird that must look. Asher appears as Josh, not mentioned in the plot synopses.

Stop! That! Train! (2026): Two drag queen stewardesses on the Glamazonian Express train must deal with a disaster.  RuPaul plays President Gagwell, and we see Jerry O'Connell, Brian Jordan Alvarez, Brock Yurich (below), Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Charo (still shaking her maracas at age 75), and Joel McHale (right).  His companion is not identified.

More after the break

Dan Cudmore: Colossus, Felix, fitness model, and the God of War. Plus his colossal Colossus cock

Canadian actor Dan Cudmore has 51 credits on the IMDB, including Peter Rasputin, aka Colossus, in the X-Men franchise, Felix in the Twilight franchise, Jackhammer in Arrow, Gridlock in The Flash, and Behemoth Thing in Superman & Lois.

He specializes in superheroes and supervillains like Colossus, but he's done other projects.  I first saw him in Magicians, as the God of War.  Apprised that a gay-stereotype god called the Nameless is looking for something the other gods stole from him, he responds "I don't know what it is, but you have my permission to search my ball sack with your tongue."  Sure, that sounds fun, I'd be happy to....oh, wait, you're being homophobic.

I know he's just playing a character, but still, the homophobic quip left a bad taste in my mouth, so to speak.

His other projects include comedies like Fresh Off the Boat, romcoms like All of My Heart (as the romantic lead's friend who devotes his life to getting him laid), and horror like Rites of Passage, which appears to have a gay subtext -- not his. 

Also 14 stunt credits including Psych, The Predator, Sonic the Hedgehog, and Percy Jackson and the Olympians.

He played a stunt cock at least once.

Some fitness modeling from early in his career

More Daniel after the break

Charles Ambrose: Civil War soldier, coast guardsman, martial artist, male model. With some j/o photos.

 

Charles Ambrose. real name Jason Ambrose, also Jason Charles Smith, is from Sandwich, Illinois, 60 miles west of Chicago. He attended Waubonsee Community College, then studied comedy at the Second City in Chicago.  I wonder if his standup routine is about growing up in Sandwich.

His resume lists several local Chicago-area plays, including The Music Man, The Moon is Down, Act Your Age, The Dating Game, and Julius Caesar.  And skills including combat, archery, horseback riding, firearms, rock climbing, jiu jitsu, and motorcycles.

Plus modeling.

23 credits on the IMDB, beginning in 2008 with the short Hell Mary.

Then occasional guest spots on tv, one or two every year.  Most of these characters don't appear in the plot synopses:

Andy on Sons of Anarchy, featuring the backside of Charlie Hunnan

Zane on Henry Danger

Deputy Jimmy on Lovecraft Country

Donny in Hollywood Vampire

Lucas in NCIS: Los Angeles

Coach Watkins in The Wonder Years update, with Julian Lerner as Brad Hitman.

Union Soldier Stephens in Righteous Gemstones Episode 4.1

His most substantial role to date: 23 episodes of the soap General Hospital, playing Ambrose, henchman of the evil Victor Cassadine.  On Victor's orders, he kidnaps Liesl Obrecht, kidnaps Ace Prince-Cassadine, and almost kills Spencer Cassadine (Nicolas Bechdel).

Coming up: The Legend of Van Dorn, about a Confederate soldier played by Lee Wilson, who was "immensely attractive to women."  Never to men, of course.  He was murdered by a husband upset over his wife's canoodling.  Charles plays General Red Jackson, another real-life figure.

And Secrets and Yards, about a small town football team with secrets.

More Charles after the break. Caution: Explicit.