The upcoming A Day for Losers stars Dakota Lotus as a military school cadet who can only win the Girl of His Dreams by throwing an epic party. To do this, he must avoid the bullyin jocks and befriend all of the outcasts and losers. Wait -- the outcasts and losers are invited to the epic party?
It sounds super retro, with all of that stupid Girl of His Dreams rhetoric, but it also stars Jacob Sartorius and Benji Kroll, who is gay in real life, so there might be some LGBT representation.
Checking through the male cast members for beefcake or gay content, I came across River Mardesic, who plays a "High School Jock."
Unusual name (it's Croatian), no photo, only a few acting credits, but a full Instagram, with some beefcake and even a few bulges. I'm going in for a closer look. The IMDB is incomplete, so I'll check his Instagram in backwards chronological order.
In 2025, he flies from Australia to the U.S. to appear in A Day for Losers.
And he starred in Home Alone: The Australian Musical, "an immersive parody of the classic film with an Australian twist." Jasper McDonald Parsons (center) plays a teenage Kevin, accidentally left home alone when his family flies off to Port Arthur for a Christmas holiday.
In 2024, River appeared in A Weekend at Nan's, a short film by Matt Harris, which had several local showings before going off to the festivals. The ad says "bring your family and friends."
In 2023, he starred in the short film Speech, directed by Charles Laversha, which won awards at four film festivals. Lloyd (River) has to read a speech by a historic figure to his class. Then he finds out that the speech was given by a dictator.
In 2022, he was cast in the Wonder Years remake, with the grown-up Dean Williams (Don Cheadle, left), narrating the story of his childhood in Montgomery, Alabama, in the 1960s. River was going to play the buddy of the teenage Dean, but due to the COVID lockdown, he couldn't leave Australia. Julian Lerner got the role.
More after the break
River was very busy in 2021:
An episode of The Power of the Dream: Two girls dream of competing in the Olympics. He plays Riley Masterson in one episode. Thomas Campbell plays his dad, Kevin Masterson
The short All of My Colours, directed by Jacinta John, who was his director in Billy Elliot (below). River sits on a staircase, singing about being weak, helpless, bullied, and not known in "all of my colours."
The podcast Project Ari , which won "Best Family Podcast" award in Australia. Ten year old ARI River), the first artificial intelligence boy, describes human experience with his human friend Jeremy (swimmer Knox Gibson)
The music video OG's Feat, by Bliss n Esso, with Chillinit: Three kids playing the hip-hop trio takes over a tv station to broadcast their message about how rich and famous they are. Significantly, they don't mention girls, except to reject them: "Ho please, I'm making the goat's cheese. / One love for the young bucks, but we're the OGs"
I researched the band, but found no evidence that they are gay or gay allies.
In 2020, River stars in Drop, an animated film about a raindrop who befriends a girl, and dances in something called Chips n Gravy. I have found no movie, tv show, or play with that name.
Then we come to River's main claim to fame, playing Billy, the boy who proved that "boys can dance," in the 2019-20 Australian production of Billy Elliot: the Musical.
Jamie Bell originated the role. Billy has also been played by Kiril Kulish, Elliot Hanna, and David Alvarez (left)
River writes to his fans, "I don't think anyone should have to talk about their sexuality at my age if they don't have to, and people are more than welcome to keep guessing because it's none of their business, But if you're being bullied, I'm here for you."
Don't worry, Buddy, I'm not asking, but I hate it when people call it a "sexuality," as if you can't be gay if you're too young to have sex. It's about who you want to be with at any age. I wanted to marry the boy next door when I was five years old, and had absolutely no knowledge of bedroom stuff.
This profile is a little penis-light, so I'm adding a random Australian guy (below).
See also:Dakota Lotus: The Disney Channel's Coop sings, shows his pitts, brings on Christmas depression.
Airport Chaplain: Rebel cop...er, chaplain, job squabbles, personal angst, and eight gay guys, some with cocks (Max has two). Set in Melbourne.
The top ten buffed big brothers of nuclear family sitcoms, from Tony Dow to Dakota Lotus
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