"How to Get to Heaven from Belfast": Dark secrets, twisting plots, hunky guys, bulges, and d*cks. And the Irish countryside

Belfast has the reputation of being cold, dark, and grim.  Its main tourist attractions are the Peace Wall,  dedicated to the memory of the Troubles, and a museum showcasing the Titanic.  Not many people's idea of a proper craic, innit?  But I heard that How to Get to Heaven from Belfast (2026), on Netflix, is a must-see, and I liked Lisa McGee's previous series, Derry Girls, so here we go with Episode 1, "The Wake" (a party held after the funeral, usually with a viewing of the body).

Prologue:  Night, with a view of the city.  Three people with flashlights find their way to isolated cabin, where a teenage girl is sitting in a pit.

Scene 1: 20 Years later: In Belfast, the highly butch Dara explains why she hates her mother in a very tight closeup, so tight that it is painful to watch.  The camera pulls away, and she is telling all this to the server at a coffee shop!

Meanwhile, Soccer Mom Robyn is driving while her two bratty preteens squabble in the back seat. She finds them so annoying that she bangs her head repeatedly against the steering wheel until it's bloody -- no, just a fantasy.

In London, Saoirse (pronounced Sheer-Shah), a writer for a hit tv show about a woman solving murders, is at lunch with two women and a man, who tell her that she should write stories with no murders. "But the name of the show is Murder Code!"  She finds the suggestion ridiculous, and storms off, bringing the man with her.  She wanted to be a playwright, but now she's writing crap.  If the man is actually her boyfriend, heterosexual identity established at Minute 7.

All three get emails from the sister-in-law of their friend Greta: she has died.  They decide to go to her village in Donegal County, Ireland. for the wake.

Scene 2: Butch Dara packs and gives her sister instructions on how to take care of their super-cranky mother.  She is picked up by Soccer Mom Robyn.  They get all weepy when Greta's favorite song plays on the radio: "Hot in Herre" (2002) by Nelly, whose name is a homophobic slur but is not actually homophobic.

While writer Saoirse flies in from London, she looks at photos of the Dead Friend and her boyfriend on her phone.  Heterosexual identity established at minute 10.  The flight attendant morphs into the girl in the pit,  probably Greta, and asks "Can I tell you a secret?"  They must have killed the guy who kidnapped Greta and put her in the pit.

Scene 3: The two friends pick up Writer Saoirse at the Belfast Airport, and criticize her outfit. They discuss why they want to go to the wake: to assuage their guilt over not contacting their friend for 20 years, and to get a break from their current crises (hating their Mom, kids, and job, respectively).  Then on through the scenic countryside to Donegal (100 miles from Belfast, but in another country). 

Back story: Writer Saiorse is getting married, but not to the guy she had lunch with.  Her fiance is Seb (Tom Basden).  The other two are pushing their way into being bridesmaids.

Scene 4: Uh-oh, at a gas station, they put petrol instead of diesel in the tank, so they stall a few miles from their destination, Knockdara (fictional).  The Recovery Service guy, Liam (Darragh Hand), makes a joke about Belfast people being violent and dangerous, which doesn't sit well with two of them.  He flirts with Writer Saoirse.

The car needs its whole fuel system replaced, so Liam tows them into town, and the flirting continues.

Turns out that he knew their dead friend, Greta!  Her husband, Owen, is his boss!  Well, it's a small town.

Scene 5: The flamboyant desk clerk at the hotel (maybe Owen Mallon) also knew Greta, and explains how she died: fell down a flight of stairs and broke her neck.

Instead of trying to walk the 2-3 miles to her house, he suggests they spend the night and set out the morning.  They could go to the 1990s-themed disco, "The Naughty Nineties."  It's so popular that teenagers bus in from Letterkenny (I didn't know that was a real place).

Scene 6: In the hotel room, Writer Saiorse checks Dead Friend Greta's Facebook page. It's been taken down.  This disturbs here.  

And Soccer Mom Robyn gets a phone call that consists of eerie static.

They all take showers (no lady parts).  We see a mysterious tattoo on their back, neck, and wrist.

Scene 7: At dinner, they discuss how "you can't go home again."  Time changes you.  The woman who died was not the girl they knew in high school; she was a stranger.

 Writer Saoirse goes outside to smoke and be depressed, and runs into Liam, now a member of the Garda.  He explains that he works for his uncle at the auto shop, and for their friend Greta's husband as a cop.  So, are you also the mayor and town veterinarian?  And the car is ready.

They gaze at each other for a long time.  I don't get it.  There were three women in the car.  How did he decide that he was only interested in Saoirse?  Is it recognizing your soul mate?  

He walks away, then returns to give her a slip of paper.  She thinks it's his phone number, but it's the bill for the car service, har har.

More after the break

Bryce Biederman: Stuntman for the X-Men, butt double for a time traveler, Jersey boy with a boyfriend and a cock

 

Sometimes misdirections are deliberate.  The witch jumping into the lake in the first scene of The Way Home is obviously meant to draw in viewers interested in the paranormal. The cover blurb of Samuel, with what looks like two boys kissing, is an obvious attempt to draw in gay viewers. 

But the photo below, which appeared on the nude celebrity website, is just a matter of misinterpretation.  It certainly looks like a teenager (Bryce Biederman) sexually assaulting another guy: notice the short hair, the masculine face, and the shirt and pants.  But I doubted that it was a boy right away.  They're not in the right position, and in movies, men are always sexually assaulted by women (and the act is treated as a joke: "Why are you complaining?  You were so lucky!")  

It's a flashback scene in The Housemaid (2025), where focus character Millie kills a fratboy who is assaulting her classmate -- the girl is actually wearing an androgynous school uniform, and her hair is lost in the shadows.  

But my belief -- however momentary -- that a gay assault was happening, plus the fratboy's very nice butt, prompted me to research actor Bryce Biederman.   

Bryce was born in 1990 in Weehawken, New Jersey., across from midtown Manhattan, and now he lives in Garrison, across the river from West Point.  He got a B.A. in Cinematography and Film Production, with a minor in psychology, from American University in 2013, then went to stunt school.

He's had a few acting gigs, such as Coleman Lawson, a coffee shop employee murdered on Gotham (2013),  but  his career is been mostly in stunting.  111 stunting credits listed on the IMDB, too many to investigate for gay content.  The most important are X-Men Apocalypse (2016),  Okja (2017), The Irishman (2018), and West Side Story (2021), where he stunt doubled for John Michael.

 

Gay fans might be more interested in his work on The Time Traveler's Wife (2022) as Theo James' stunt double.  Here he falls naked out of a window into heavy traffic.

Don't worry, Theo James shows us his real butt (and cock) in less dangerous scenes.

He has provided the action scenes (and occasionally the nude scenes) for may male actors, including Alan Cumming, Bobby Cannavale, Carter Jenkins, Frank Grillo, Hugh Dancy, Jack Huston, Josh Bowman, Peter Scanavino, Ryan Cooper, Ryan Mccartan, John Berenthal...I got tired of listing them all.

More after the break

Mr. Bigstuff: Short guy with big stuff isn't into ladies, has a gay boss and a psycho brother. With six big reveals and a lot of butts

 

I don't have a lot of  luck with Britcoms.  The references have me scurrying to the internet, the jokes a little too droll, and I can never tell if the actions are meant to be sitcom exaggerations or over-the-top bizarre.  But I'm checking out Mr. Bigstuff, which just dropped on Hulu, because it stars Ryan Sampson, gay in real life and 5'4". 

"Bigstuff" is one of those culturally specific references.  There's no definition online. Does it mean that the guy is important, a "big shot," or that he's a "big dog," gifted beneath the belt?

Episode 1, Scene 1: Glen (Ryan Sampson) and his girlfriend parking in the car outside a horribly decrepit office building.  She consoles him for being unable to perform.  It's been a long time.  Maybe he's not into you, lady.  Or not into ladies at all.  But they're still getting married in 100 days.  

Scene 2:  Glen at his horrible, soul-destroying job as a carpet salesman.  He's pointing out some boring heterosexual stuff to a boy-girl couple, when the Manager comes by.  He asks for a promotion.  In response, the Manager pretends to shoot him.  He falls to the ground, "dead."  I guess that's a no?  

Left: The Manager is played by Adrian Scarborough, who I thought was in The Thursday Murder Club.  He's not, and I deleted my review due to low pageviews.

Meanwhile, a hand smokes cigarettes and drinks beer.  Eventually it turns into a burly bloke, who bursts into the carpet store and asks the receptionist if she's seen "this geezer," displaying a photo of a schoolboy. In the U.S. a "geezer" is old. She calls the Manager.  The situation escalates to Burly Guy choking him and demanding to know where the "geezer" is.

Glen hides behind some display cases, then runs out and drives home.  

Left: Burly Guy is played by Danny Dyer, who is straight but played a gay character in Borstal Boy (2000) and the father of a gay teen on East Enders.

Scene 3: At home, the Girlfriend from Scene 1 is lying in bed.  She explains that there was a gas leak at work, so everyone had to leave, and he explains that he just popped in to get his sandwiches.  I expect that there's a man hiding in the closet. Nope: "Get in here, you c*nt."  In the U.S., that term is extremely offensive, and it refers only to ladies, but I think here it's just a mild expletive, like "dope." 

Left: Glenn's butt, from Plebes.

They discuss boring heterosexual stuff as Glen undresses (no beefcake).  She tries to get him to do sexy stuff, but he refuses.  You're in bed with your lady at 10:00 on a workday.  Why would you not, unless you're not into ladies?

Next Glen drinks something from a water glass by the bedside, then starts to gag.  Girlfriend apologizes -- she didn't expect him to drink it (then why was it on his side of the bed?).  They're both very upset.  

We never learn what it was. Maybe Metamucil, or a lady supplement?

She rushes downstairs to fetch him some tea -- and finds the Burly Guy sitting on the couch!

Scene 4:  Glen throws the disgusting liquid at him, and Girlfriend runs for the pepper spray.  "You can't be here!  Get out of my house!"

"I just want to talk, Glen!" he exclaims.  

Girlfriend; "You know each other?"  Big Reveal #1

"No.  Not really...I mean, I used to."  This upsets Burly Guy, and he leaves.

Left: Burly Guy's butt, from Plebes.

Scene 5: Back at work, everyone is gossiping about what happened earlier "with that geezer and the Manager."  Is that a common phrase in Britain for someone under age 80?   A woman is upset that she wasn't around to see him "get shanked."  In the U.S., "shanked" means being stabbed.  

The Manager calls Glen, crying: "You need to get here immediately! I'm sorry -- I didn't know!  I can't do this!"  Burly Guy comes onto the phone and tells him: "Dagenham, by the water, where he died.  You know the spot."  Darn, I thought they were old boyfriends.

More after the break

Cyrus and TJ: Are the "Andi Mack" boyfriends gay in real life? What about Jonah? Or Bowie? With some bulges and d*cks

 

Andi Mack (2017-19) was the first Disney teencom with an identified gay character: Cyrus (Joshua Rush), originally dating Iris, comes out in Episode 3.11 (2019).  He befriends TJ Kippen (Luke Mullen), a sarcastic, mean-spirited basketball star, teaches him to be nicer, and admits him to the friend group.  Everyone assumes that TJ is straight, so they are just good buddies.

Then, in the last scene of the series finale, Episode 3.20 (2019),  they hold hands.  In close up, partially obscured by the slats of a bench. Can you even tell what they're doing?  It seems rather tepid, but caused widespread celebration in LGBTQ communities as a milestone, the first canonical gay couple in a Disney tv series.

Wait -- Kelvin and Keefe held hands in Righteous Gemstones Episode 2.7, and fans were saying "So what?  Straight guys can hold hands.  It doesn't mean that they're gay."

And if that's all it takes, Craig and Eric of Drake and Josh held hands in 2008.  

But we'll go with "the first," and conduct some research to see if either Cyrus or TJ is gay in real life.  (And look for other gay characters and nude photos, of course).

Joshua Rush (Cyrus) went on to voice the titular character in Where's Waldo (2019-21), based on the book series where you have to find the red-striped guy in a crowd, then got his degree from Penn State and moved into politics.  As of this writing, he is the Communications Director of the Texas House Democratic Campaign Committee. In my day you would never dream of limping your wrist like that.

He announced that he was bisexual on social media a few weeks after the hand-holding episode aired.

I found a potential bulge pic.  Notice that the watch tracks.

Luke Mullen: After Andi Mack, Luke played a straight guy in four episodes of the teencom Side Hustle, a fratboy playing volleyball on the beach in the Barbie movie, and other straight or not-identified characters.

Here he prepares to be splattered in an episode of the anthology series American Horror Stories.

More after the break

Joe Davidson: The gladiator, surfer, soap stud, and gator poacher doesn't mind if you check out his d*ck. With bonus Thomas Jane and Takaya butt

In Spartacus: House of Ashur Episode 1.1, Gladiator Logus (Joe Davidson) insults the dwarf trio Brothers Ferox: "My cock stands larger threats!" They promptly eviscerate him.

During the filming, Joe hooked up with (or buddied up with) the probably gay Mikey Thompson (Musicus).  Plus a brief internet search revealed this photo from the soap Neighbours: Joe's character apparently has a boyfriend.

Plus there are no girls and a lot of guys on his social media posts.  That's enough for more extensive research to determine if Joe is gay in real life, has played gay characters, or both.  Hopefully both.  

Born around 1992 or 1993, Joe grew up on Australia's ritzy Gold Coast, around Brisbane, and began on-screen acting in some teen series:

A diver in an episode of H2O: Just Add Water (2010), about three teenager girls who turn into mermaids (with Luke Mitchell as their human ally).

A swimmer in SLIDE (2011): A Melbourne girl moves to Brisbane and finds the requisite allies, crushes, and enemies, including a gay-ish boyfriend.

A surfer boy in Mako Mermaids (2013), with those three teenage mermaids up to new antics.  A merman (Chai Hanson) is added to the cast.

Joe also meets a mermaid while grieving over his dead father in Glass Tunnel (2013).  

Plus he worked at Warner Brothers Movie World, a theme park in Queensland, playing characters like Edward Scissorhands and Fred from Scooby Doo.

After graduating from the "prestigious three-year program" at Actors Central Australia in Sydney, Joe was cast in his first major role, playing Cassius Grady in the soap opera Neighbours (2017-2018).   He appears as a muscular mystery man at a Guy Fawkes Day party on the same night that the evil Hamish Roche is murdered.  Hamish's son Tyler is the chief suspect.

Left: the OMG Blog thinks that this is a photo of Cassius, but Neighbours never had frontal nudity.

Cassius goes on to save Tyler's girlfriend from a capsized boat, start dating her, rescue a kidnapped baby, get a job as a gardener, and finally admit that he was the one who murdered Hamish (gasp) because he is the evil guy's long-estranged son (double gasp). 

Um...Cassius was straight, buddy. 

Maybe there are some gay roles in his later work?

Stranded (2018): A British soldier is stranded with a lady.  They smooch in the water. 

Abandoned (2018).  What do you think?

Sons of Summer (2023):  A surfer brings his buds on a trip to the Gold Coast town where his dad was murdered, and runs afoul of murderous drug dealers.  He's got a girlfriend.

Anyone But You (2023); Ben (Glen Powell) and Bea don't like each other, but Bea's sister is marrying Ben's friend Pete's sister, and for some reason they have to pretend to be a couple at the wedding.  Joe plays the current boyfriend of Ben's ex girlfriend, who dumps him for Bea's ex-boyfriend. It's based on Shakespeare's Much Ado About Nothing, so you've got to expect some partner switching. 

In this scene, Joe shows his butt to demonstrate that he's much hotter than Ben.

He shows his dick, too (after the break).

Finn Kaifur: Icelandic college student studies ballet, takes a polar plunge, shows his stuff. With bonus Pete White and nude model Shaun Ross.

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"28 Days Later: The Bone Temple": A cured zombie, the Devil's son, a Jimmy cult, musclemen, dongs, and 8 gay actors.

 

We just saw 28 Years Later: The Bone Temple (2026), the sequel to 28 Years Later, with 14-year old Spike (Alfie Williams) swept away from his island haven into a mainland Scotland ravaged by a zombie apocalypse.  He unwillingly joins a cult run by Sir Lord Jimmy Crystal (Josh O'Connor), who fancies himself the son of Old Nick.  His Satanic Majesty has given Sir Jimmy the task of roaming his countryside and eliminating the remaining humans.  After torturing them, of course.

Very graphic torture. He begins by forcing Spike into a fight-to-the-death with Jimmy Shite (all of the followers wear blond wigs and are named Jimmy, after early 2000s tv personality Jimmy Saville).  Spike wins by stabbing him in the thigh; the others laugh and jeer as blood spurts out like a fountain.

Then the Jimmies invade a farmhouse, string up the occupants in a barn, and skin them alive.  But a woman who escaped returns, sets the barn on fire, and we see people burning to death.

Meanwhile Dr. Kelson (Ralph Fiennes), who is building the Bone Temple as a monument to the dead, pacifies the gigantic zombie Samson (Chi Parry-Lewis) with morphine and befriends him.  They even dance together.  The gay subtext is so overt that one suspects that it's intentional.  Finally Kelson figures a way to restore Samson to sentience with anti-psychotic drugs.

Spoiler Alert: The Jimmies stumble upon Dr. Kelson, and seeing him surrounded by bones, red in color, and dancing with a demon, assume that he is Old Nick.  Sir Jimmy soon discovers that he is not, but insists that he pretend to be, so he won't lose face with his followers.  So Kelson puts on a sound-and-fire show to Iron Maiden's "Number of the Beast."  He's about to let them leave, but he sees Spike as a Jimmy hostage, and changes his mind: in the old order, God sacrificed his son, so Old Nick wants the same.  Sir Jimmy is crucified upside down.

Bone Temple was definitely made with an eye for masculine beauty.  There are several shirtless musclemen.  Chi-Lewis Parry's prosthetic penis is much more visible, and in some scenes his incredibly muscular body is not covered with muck.

We see some other penises, including Dr. Kelson's (but to be fair, name one of Ralph Fiennes's movies where he doesn't show his dick).

I was worried that Spike would get a girlfriend.  He bonds with a girl, but she is much older, and treats him as a little brother or son rather than a potential boyfriend.

In fact, there is no hetero-romance anywhere, among anyone, except when we get a close-up of a photo of Dr. Kelson's long-dead wife, to heterosexualize him.

And so many of the Jimmies are played by gay actors that one suspects a deliberate casting decision

The Jimmies:

Jack O'Connell as Sir Jimmy Crystal.  Straight, but has played gay men several times.

More after the break

Sam Sherpa-Moore: Sherpa actor fights a watermelon, flirts with Doctor Who, shows his d*ck. With Joel Fry's butt and Callum's cock.

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Oliver Atherton: Mennonite, Wannabe, and Boy Next Door, then nothing. With Mennonite and some co-star in law cocks

 

This guy appears in Episode 1.1 of The Way Home,  singing the ridiculously old-fashioned song "Crazy," by Patsy Cline, at a high school talent show.

I'm crazy for feeling so lonely

Crazy for feeling so blue

I knew

You'd love me as long as you wanted

And then some day

You'd leave me for somebody new

When he's finished, he smugly pushes past focus character Alice, who is waiting to go on next.  

She gets stage fright and rushes off,  and he gives her a final zinger: "I knew you were just a one-hit wonder."

Who doesn't feel like punching this guy in the nose?  Or kissing him?

There was considerable fan discussion about the character's name.  The cast list for the episode lists several actors with no photos, playing Jasper, Student 1, Student 2, Teen 1, and so on.  

Turns out he is Wannabe, played by Oliver Atherton.

Researching Oliver presents some problems: An Oliver Atherton has worked as a visual effects supervisor on many movies, and actress Natalie Oliver-Atherton (no relation), crowned Miss Senior America in 2024, has a much stronger internet presence But I found our Oliver's Linkedin.

 He grew up in Etobioke, which sounds very exotic but is actually just a suburb of Toronto, and attended the School of the Arts, a specialized high school where you can concentrate in art, dance, music, or film.  

He has a brother named Vid V__, from Serbia, so maybe he has a Serbian heritage. 

After graduating with a concentration in film in 2018, Oliver enrolled at the University of Toronto.  There he competed in the North American Debating Championship, interned with an English professor (researching 18th century English law, literature, and politics), wrote for the student newspaper, and worked as a bartender at Stackt ("an artsy industrial-chic complex" that offers queer events).

I'm surprised that he had time for auditions.

Maybe he didn't: there are only three acting roles listed on the IMDB.

#1: Murdoch Mysteries Episode 16.6 (2022): A man is brought to the hospital badly injured, and dies before the doctors can find out who he is.  Murdoch and Ogden track him down: Enoch Snider (Oliver), from a Mennonite community.  Turns out that he was murdered because he didn't want to marry the girl he was assigned.  The transcript says that "he didn't fit in with the other boys," and he had a buddy named Mervin (Liam Green), but I couldn't determine if he was gay.

Left: A nude Mennonite man.  

#2: The short Most of the Time We Are Just Waiting (2022), written and directed by Molly Sheers:  Her town is evacuating, so 13-year old Nora and the Boy Next Door go out looking for her older sister, last seen with a boy "with questionable intentions."  There are only two male actors, Oliver and Piers Bijvoet, so which plays which is up for grabs.  

More after the break