Aleks Kurdzielewicz: Femme boy from Poland with some gay subtext roles and Pride merch. And grown-up co-star cocks, of course.

 

My "Profiles to Do" folder has guys that I added with minimal research, and now, for some of them, I don't remember why.  Have they played gay characters?  Are they gay in real life?  Are there n*de photos?

For instance,  Aleks Kurdzielewicz, a femme boy model and actor from Poland. 

1. Has he played gay characters?

Aleks has nine acting credits on the IMDB, all in Polish or German productions.  Let's hope that they're available to stream in the U.S.

2020: 

Berek, a music video by Plan Be (Bartosz Krupa). Bartosz is chased by men in black masks past a school classroom, a blond women, teenagers smoking, a man and a woman on a couch, and a depressed looking family on a park bench.  Eventually they join him.  Sounds like a critique of the heterosexist job, house, wife, kids trajectory.

2022:

How I Fell in Love with a Gangster, about the rise of infamous gangster Nikos Skotarczak (Tomasz Wlosok, left).  Aleks plays the young Nikos.

An episode of Professional Secrecy (2022), about a woman discovering dark secrets about her husband

2023:

An episode of Na sygnale, about paramedics.  Starring Dariusz Wieteska, left, who has been in 434 episodes to date.

An episde of Dzielnica strachu, about cops fighting crime.

2024:

Oderbruch: Lucas Gregorowicz plays a detective solving a murder in the Oderbruch region of Germany, near the Polish border.  Aleks plays his son. 

Two episodes of Ojciec Mateusz, about a priest (Artur Zmijewski) who solves murders in his spare time. Over 400 to date. 

 He posts a scene where he's getting dressed up and wears his dad's cologne, but he calls it "perfume."  He doesn't mention having a date with a girl.  Sounds like the kid is queer-coded.

 

This is from Artur's performance piece "The Whole One."  Or it might be another Artur.

More after the break

My 20 Coming Out Movies, from "Bomba the Jungle Boy" to "American Gigolo." With a surprising number of nude dudes.

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Brandon Spink: The young Batman, Jackass, and Baelfire takes a girl to the prom but comes out later. Maybe. With two dick shots and a Super butt

Recently I profiled Mason McKenzie, who played Gideon in Once Upon a Time, where all of the Disney fantasy characters you've ever heard of are connected in a huge genealogy.  I thought I would research some of the other actors that gave me a gay vibe.  First up, femme boy Brandon Spink, who played Baelfire, son of Rumpelstiltskin and his first wife (making him Gideon's half-brother).  He is briefly swayed by the homoerotic freedom offered by Peter Pan's Lost Boys, but in the end accepts his heterosexual destiny and marries Emma Swan.  Their son becomes the Chosen One. 

Let's see if the same thing happened the real-life Brandon (center).

Spink, by the way, comes from an Old English word for "finch."  It's not dirty. 

According to an article in Oz Magazine, Brandon was born in 1995 in Marietta, Georgia, and began acting on stage at age seven, playing Captain Hook's life partner Smee in Peter Pan.  After minor parts in Game of Your Life (2011), with Nathan Kress, and Devil's Knot (2013), with Colin Firth, he hit the big time in 2015, playing the young version of the Jackass star  a tv pilot called Untitled Johnny Knoxville Project. 

The young Johnny is a prankster and rebel growing up in the "outlaw culture" of 1980s Knoxville, Tennessee. 

That same year, Brandon was cast as the young Bruce Wayne in Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016).  Playing the iconic figure was "a dream come true" for the boy.  Plus he got to work with Ben Affleck (grown-up Bruce), Henry Cavill (Superman), and Jeremy Irons (Alfred the Butler).

Next came Game of Silence (2016), with childhood secrets threatening a successful lawyer; the teenage Baelfire in Once Upon a Time (2017); Berlin Station (2017), about CIA agents in Germany; and a few show that I've never heard of.

Brandon's next big break was in Fear Street: Part Two (2021), the second in a trilogy about paranormal events in a small town in different historic periods.  In 1978, it's a summer camp with a serial killer.  Brandon's character, Will Goode, is the mayor of the town, with wife and kids, in Part 1 (1994).  As a teenager, he bullies the other teens and survives the slaughter.

There are lesbian characters in every Fear Street episode, but gay men do not exist.

In 2025 Brandon appeared in four episodes of the sports drama All American, as a random football player; and three episodes of NCIS: Origins, about the NCIS (Naval Criminal Investigation Service) in the 1990s, as the teenage version of agent Michael Franks (played by Michael Erik White, left).

Michael seems to be gay in real life, but the character is straight.  

In fact, all of Brandon's characters have been straight or straight-by-default. 

He'd better be gay in real life, or what am I doing this for?

More after the break

Survival of the Thickest: Mavis and her nemesis spar in Paris, Khalil and Luca "get closer," and who the heck is Lopez? With his dick and nude models.

I wasn't planning to review Survival of the Thickest, about a thick black woman finding body positivity as a fashion designer.  But Queerty said that it had gay representation, and one of the cast members, somebody with the last name Lopez (I didn't record the first name), appeared on the nude celebrity subreddit, so I figured I'd give it a shot. 

In Episode 3.4, "C'est la vie, Bitch," they visit Paris Fashion Week, while back in New York, Khalil and Luca "connect." They must be the gay couple, and there'll be shots of Paris. 

Khalil is played by Tone Bell, butt left.

Scene 1: Mavis and her friend on a tour bus, shouting "I'm a designer!"  They reach their destination, the Victoria Palace Hotel , but they're actually staying at the horrible hostel next door.

"It's got character," Mavis says, trying to look on the bright side. "It's got queef."  I think the word means a lady part fart.  It was used to insult Keefe on The Righteous Gemstones.  

"It smells like an 18th century pap smear."  A lot of lady part jokes.

She likes the doorknobs in the center, like a belly button, and asks the concierge if she can check his belly button.  He refuses.

Scene 2: Seven flights of stairs and a hallway bathroom, but there's a view of the Eiffel Tower from the window.  Of course -- on tv every Parisian hotel room looks out at the Eiffel Tower, even if  it's miles away and facing the wrong direction.   Mavis washes her breasts with a handi-wipe, while they discuss how far they've come in two years.

Whomp, someone farts.  Turns out that the ladies have a roommate sleeping under the covers in the top bunk.  

Scene 3: Luca (Marouane Zotti), the one who's going to connect with Khalil (hopefully by kissing), is counseling a refugee couple, assuring them that they'll get housing soon.  They also need a job.  "I promise that you'll..."

His coworker Donny Wang (Ronnie Chien) butts in to tell them that their chances are slim,  When they leave, he advises "Never promise anything.  Keep their expectations vague...."

In other news, a girl asked him to DJ at the strip club tonight.  

"Sorry. I have plans with friends," Luca tells him.

"Oh, I wasn't inviting you.  I was bragging about all the naked ladies I'm going to see."  Ugh, a character whose shtick is being hetero-horny.  

Scene 4: Mavis is giving a pep talk to her models, telling them to "eye fuck" everyone.  There are some androgynous and genderfuck types, and some plus-sized, like David Ventakapen (left).   They walk across a portico (with the Eiffel Tower in the background, of course) and get photographed.  Then Mavis is introduced to thunderous applause.   A journalist tells her that the genderfuck outfit has made her the Best New Renegade of Fashion Week, which comes with a Vogue cover.  And she's invited to the Vogue party tonight.  Wait -- she's the most renowned fashion designer in the world, but she's staying in a youth hostel?

Suddenly Mavis almost collapses in pain, but her friend tells her to dance it off.  Chekhov's Gun: This better be important.

And when are we getting to the Lopez guy?

Scene 5: They have time to kill before the Vogue party tonight, so we get a montage of the usual.  They want to take a boat tour, but the tour guide won' sell them tickets, even though the boat is only half full. And when they try to go to a restaurant, the waiter (Theo Pham) tellsl them that it's closed.  Racism plotline? About 10% of the French population has African ancestry, more in big cities.

They try a Senegalese restaurant in the Black neighborhood, Château Rouge in the 18th Arrondissement,  and are served immediately.   "I like Black Paris a little better than the rest of Paris," the Friend muses.

Khalil and Luca getting close after the break

Kelton Dumont's Hot/Hung Photos, Part 3: Birthday biceps, bare bums, bondage, rugger dicks, and Jacob Tremblay

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Joey Beni: Bodybuilder appears in five gay tv shows with multiple nude scenes, so he's obviously gay, right?

 

I don't usually have good luck with the guys depicted on the celebrity cock subreddit.  It seems like they either appeared in one movie 15 years ago and have no social media presence, or they are very famous in Lithuania but have no movies or tv shows available to stream in the U.S.  But I'll give Joey Beni a try because he has an Instagram page, 22 acting credits, and a 2025 interview in VoyageLA, which features "LA's most inspiring stories."

His bio comes from the interview: Joey was born in San Diego in 1994.  His first acting gig was playing Aladdin in the San Diego Children's Theater. Later he moved to Florida and then to Virginia Beach, where he attended Tidewater Community College.  In 2006 he decided to become an actor, which means moving to L.A., so he saved up his  money for two years and drove out: "I had no friends, no family, and no job in LA. I was able to lock in an apartment over the phone so all I had was an address, my life savings, and a dream."  

He studied comedy with the Groundlings and acting at the Archibald Studio, and started auditioninng. 

 Joey wonders why his friends are getting acting roles so easily, and he is so often left behind.  Maybe you need more nude photos?   He got one job because the guy they cast had to drop out, so they asked him to substitute at the last minute. He complains that acting is 90% luck, 10% talent.

Not too inspiring, buddy.  Actually, you sound a little bitter.  

After 18 years in the business, Joey has some industrial videos (The Benefits of Sunscreen, Sexual Harassment in the Workplace), some tv commercials, a drug prevention PSA, and a dating show, The Hook-Up.

That last show sounds promising, but it was actually heterosexual only.  Joey's episode features contestant Ray using social media to choose from between "four lovely ladies."  

Those 22 acting credits listed on the IMDB are mostly small roles, often unnamed characters:

Contestant #1 in Youthful Days (2014), starring Bryan James as a guy with two personalities.

Hot Guy #1 in an episode of Go-Go Boy Interrupted (2016): Jimmy Fowlie stars as a "go-go boy" who is approaching 30 and aging out of the business, with no other marketable skills. Being hung won't get you a job staring at a computer screen in a cubicle.  Gay actor Brian Jordan Alvarez, Scott Evans, and Nick Adams appear, and Lynne Marie Stewart of Pee-Wee's Playhouse, who I thought was a drag queen until recently, played Go-Go's Mom.

The Other Cowboy in Country Thunder (2017).

In M.F.A. (2017), an art student turned vigilante, targeting rapists got away with it, like former teen idol Michael Welch, Kyle Pettis (left), and Joey.

Wedding Photographer in a 2022 episode of Days of Our Lives.

Sexy Man in a 2022 episode of DemonHuntr, featuring two gay guys whose side hustle is paranormal investigation.  Apparently they don't investigate many nude ghosts; only Joey (top photo)  and Jason Caceres (left) give us frontals.

Man in Bondage #1 in Babylon (2023), which I found too disgusting to get through.

More after the break

Ibrahim Eloouhabi: The "I Killed a Kid" kid tells us his pronouns, models some Liberace outfits. With nude Moroccan dudes

 

I felt like I should profile one of the actors from In the Hand of Dante, to get something of value from it (other than picking up my bilingual edition of The Inferno again).  So  I checked the actors who played teenage Dante, the murdered Bartender, the guy who killed his father,  the boy with a big knife (who was killed), and Mephistopheles, but none of them were suitable.  How about the boy who tells his uncle, "I just killed a kid"?  It's not clear in the movie (nothing is), but he grows up to be focus character Nick (Oscar Isaacs, right).

Ibrahim Elouahabi gives his pronouns (he/his), and speaks Arabic.  That's enough for a profile. 

Not just Arabic.  He also speaks Turkish and Darija (Moroccan Arabic) and he is studying French. 

Left: Moroccan guy.

Darija is not intelligible with Modern Standard Arabic: it has reduced the number of vowels, adapted its grammar to Tamazight (Berber), and borrowed much of its vocabulary from French: forshita (fork), tabla (table), boulis (police).

Ibrahim's family is from Morocco, but he was born "on the vibrant streets of Brooklyn," according to his hyperbolic IMDB bio.  He began his career in 2019, as a fashion model for Zara, Nike, and Macy's.  Soon he was performing in commercials for Brawny paper towels, Magic Spoon (upscale cereal), and Marriot Vacation Club.

His on-screen performances begin with two shorts, The Prescription (2020), no description available, and Roque (2022), about Salvadorean poet Roque Dalton.  Ibrahim plays Roque as a boy, and Jaden McKnew (left) as an adult.

Next came a small role in Audrey's Children (2024), a biopic of Dr. Audrey Evans, who developed "revolutionary treatments" for sick children.

In Ebenezer the Traveler (2024), the ghosts of Scrooge, his sister, Jacob Marley, and a grown-up Tiny Tim are assigned to help an aspiring singer in modern-day Oklahoma.  I think Ibrahim plays her son.

More after the break

Five things I like and five that I don't like about "My Brother, the Minotaur." #5 involves butts and Ely d*ck

 

My Brother the Minotaur (2026) is an Irish animated series about a minotaur boy named Lorcan (voiced by Ely Solan, left) being raised by humans.

In Greek mythology, the Minotaur is a monster, the offspring of Pasiphaë and a bull, hidden away in the Labyrinth and fed human youth, but here minotaurs are humanoid beings with massive torsos and bull-horns.

Lorcan's questions about his heritage become urgent as he enters his teen years, and begins experiencing rage, sudden horn hardening (symbolic of something or other), and disturbing nightmares.  Meanwhile, strange things are happening in the village.

After watching several episodes, here is my evaluation:

Things I dislike:

1. Lorcan's main ally is his younger brother Charlie.  Making him a brother rather than a friend removes any possibility of gay subtext, even after they rescue each other, say "I'm not leaving without you," and so on.  

2. The boys have two female friends, Dana and Harper.  They don't express any romantic interest in the episodes I watched, but they may in the future.

3. The background players are entirely heteronormative. The boys have male-female parents and grandparents.  In crowd scenes, it's always male-female couples, never same-sex pairs.  Even in the school cafeteria, every table is occupied by boy-girl couples.

4. Leisure pursuits are entirely gender-polarized.  The boys' room is filled with stereotypic boys' toys.  In a later episode, we see a doll that Lorcan played with as a baby.

5. Antagonist Craignelder is an old-fashioned moustache-twirling melodrama villain, who wants Lorcan locked up because he's a bigot, and wants to buy the dad's coffee shop just to be mean, mwah-ha-ha. Wait -- isn't that doing the guy a favor?  He's also a femme stereotype, with ascot and ostantatious ring.

Left: Antagonist Craignelder is played by Michael Sheen.

Five things I liked after the break

Rooster Episode 1.1: Trashy novelist at an elite college, hetero romance problems, a gay sidekick, Dunster dick, and the guy from "Scrubs"

 

Robert Heinlein once complained that science fiction was about exploring the vastness of time and space, while mainstream fiction -- the Rabbit Runs, Appointments in Samarra, and  Complaining Portnoys of our college lit classes -- was about men who hate their jobs and their wives.  "For Heaven's sake, get new jobs, get new wives, and shut the f*k up."

I am reminded of that quote when I think of the works of Steve Carrell:  Anchorman, Dan in Real Life,  The 40 Year Old Virgin, Cafe Society,  Date Night, Dinner for Schmucks, The Morning Show, The Four Seasons, all about little men trying desperately to find meaning in jobs and wives that they hate. Coincidentally, this is precisely the "job, house, wife, kids" trajectory that I rebelled against growing up.

So I wasn't planning to watch the HBO MAX series Rooster (2026).  Then the promo showed a young man telling Steve, "nice washboard (abs)," referring to the hunk on the cover of his book.  Later he seems to become Steve's sidekick.  So Steve probably writes gay novels, and probably has a gay sidekick.  Enough potential to review Episode 1.

Scene 1:  Famous novelist Greg Russo (Steve) looks morose as he is escorted through the elegant Spanish Colonial campus of Ludlow College (actually the University of the Pacific, Stockton).  He sees a naked old guy, who waves -- but his escort, Eric (Myles Perez, left), doesn't see anyone.  A hallucination?

Eric tells him to wait here, then zones him out and refuses to speak anymore.  Fortunately, Professor Shepherd, who arranged his campus visit,  is just walking up. 

He's nervous -- he writes trashy beach novels, not literature: "Characters you like have sex, characters you don't like get shot in the face."  Why would elite college students want to see him?  

Scene 2: The reading, in a giant lecture hall.  The students criticize his protagonist, Rooster, for describing the Girl in food terms during their 17 sexual acts (18, if you count the blow job). Isn't that sexist?  

Russo counters that she is strong and powerful -- she rescues Rooster, remember? "But she takes off her bikini top to do it."   A jock praises that scene: "The Girl is smokin'!"  Hey, isn't he the gay sidekick?  I'm starting to suspect that I've been tricked.

Scene 3: Next Russo meets the College President (John C. McGinley, the homophobic, sexist jerk on Scrubs).  He strips to his underwear to show off his physique: "You're thinking, most college presidents are bookish shut-ins, but this guy is jacked!" He looks like the naked guy from earlier.  So it wasn't a hallucination, just a crazy act that would never happen on any real college campus.

They allude to a "sex scandal" involving Katie and Archie (not mentioned before), and the President offers Russo a job as Writer-in-Residence.  "But I didn't even go to college."  "Who cares?  It's over-rated."  Academic malaise at its snarkiest. 

Left: McGinley's butt

Scene 4:  Next stop: Another giant lecture hall, a lecture on French impressionism, Monet at Giverny.  It's Russo's daughter Katie, a professor of art history (and the sex scandal lady).  As the students leave, she notes that her Dad doesn't like interacting with other humans, so they can get extra credit for looking him in the eye and saying "I love you very much."  A student does it!

Next Katie points out that the college has asked Russo to do a reading a billion times; why agree now?  "Admit it -- you're checking up on me, to see if I'm ok after the sex scandal."  We finally find out what it is: her husband Archie dumped her for a grad student.  Hetero Romance Problem #1.  

She has no idea why. Everything was normal, and then she was moving into the dead hockey coach's house.   Everybody on campus knows, and keeps staring at her and asking questions.  And it's difficult to avoid running into him or his new girlfriend on a small campus.  She's about to crack.

She points them out, sitting on a park bench.  "The girlfriend isn't even hot.  She's like a regular person.  Why did he dump me for her?"  Maybe he liked her personality?

As Russo peeks through the bushes, husband Archie and the girlfriend leave, and a lesbian couple notice him.  They think he's a perv, har har.   He runs away as they film him.  

Spoiler alert: This is set up to have consequences, like Russo being arrested, or the job offer rescinded, but it is never mentioned again.

Scene 5: Russo stops at a convenience store for some water.  Tommy (Maximo Salas), the jock from earlier, praises the Rooster books. Uh-oh, he forgot his id, so Russo buys his beer for him.  If he's under 21, you're in big trouble, buddy.

More after the break