Max Casella after dating Doogie: Christian Bale's buddy, Tony Soprano's driver, Timon, Bottom, bi. With a small d*ck bonus.

 

In the early 1990s, if your parents belong to a certain socioeconomic class, you were required to watch ABC's ultra-conservative programming block on Wednesday nights: 

The Wonder Years, with Fred Savage as a boy winning the Girl of His Dreams in the 1960s.

Home Improvement, with Tim Allen grunting with tools.

Coach, with Craig T. Nelson as a...football coach.

And Doogie Howser, MD, with Neil Patrick Harris as a 16-year old who somehow managed to finish medical school, become a doctor, and get girls.

I wasn't of a certain age, I was not living with parents of a certain socioeconomic class, so on Wednesday nights I was watching Seinfeld.   Not Doogie Howser, because of its ridiculous premise and "Girls are the meaning of life!" ideology.  

 But I did notice Max Casella, who played Doogie's buddy: 22-26 years, "cute as a bug's ear," as the oldsters would say, and a member of the Short Guy Brigade at 5'7".

As everyone knows, Neil Patrick Harris came out a few years after Doogie, and for some inscrutable reason agreed to play "himself' in the homophobic Harold & Kumar movies and heterosexual horndog Barney on How I Met Your Mother (2005-14).  More recently, in Uncoupled (2022), he played a gay man dealing with the death of his partner and suddenly becoming single at midlife. 

But what has Max Casella been doing?

I'm researching the three standard questions: 

1. Any gay roles?

2. Gay in real life?

3. Any n*ude photos?  

1. Any gay roles?

In Newsies (1992), a Disney movie about the newsboys' strike of 1899, Max plays Racetrack Higgins, who may be gay or bisexual.  When focus character Jack (Christian Bale) says that they can't beat up the newsboys who refuse to join the strike, he "jokingly" suggests kissing them.

In Ed Wood (1994), the biopic of the director known for crossdressing, Glen or Glenda? and Plan 9 from Outer Space, Max plays Paul Marco, the gay actor who often starred in Wood's films.  His sexual identity is not mentioned here.

Later Max moved into animation, voicing characters on Pepper Anne, Courage the Cowardly Dog, Kim Possible; and video games such as Jak and Daxter (a humanoid elf and his previously-human otter-weasel buddy) and Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony (he doesn't voice Gay Tony).

He appeared in 28 episodes of The Sopranos (2001-07) as Benny Fazio, who is partnered with Chris Moltisanti and sometimes works as Capo Tony's driver.  He's married with children.

Inside Llewelyn Davis (2013) depicts a day in the life of the folk singer (Oscar Davis) in the early 1960s Greenwich Village scene.  Max plays Club Manager Pappi Corsicato, who has sex with Llewelyn's girl.

Tulsa King (2024-): Sylvester Stallone plays a mob boss who tries to start a new cosa nostra among the Oklahoma cowboys.  Max plays Manny Truisi, formerly a soldier in the Invernizzi Family, who tried to assassinate Stallone's Dwight, then fled. and started a new life working on a horse ranch.  He's got a wife and kid.

More after the break.  

Jason Hervey: Did the "Wonder Years" big brother hook up with guys in West Hollywood? How big was he? With explicit photos

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Gemstones Episode 4.8, Continued: We finally see Big Dick Mitch, the boy named Stacy, a serial killer, and a lot of tied-up guys

Previous: Gemstones Episode 4.8: BJ's hookup, Corey's birthday blade, and Tyler's tree trunk

Earlier in the episode, we saw the homophobic Vance Simkins dragged offstage, BJ getting up out of his wheelchair and walking again, Teenjus in a dance competition, and Cobb Milsap gifting his son Corey with a very special knife.  

The Songs Aimee-Leigh and Lori Wrote:    The siblings are ending a very long board meeting.  They're anxious to go home, but Martin insists on bringing in one last visitor.  What is he, their receptionist?

It's Lori Milsap, Eli's ex-girlfriend!  She needs to talk to Eli, but he won't answer her calls or texts.  They growl and posture, and yell about how much they hate her, until she proves that she loves them.

 1. When Judy was a few months old, they had to drive to Nashville for a show, and Aimee-Leigh missed her so much that she couldn't stop crying.  So they wrote "Little Angels, Big Hearts." Why did you leave your three-month old baby at home? And by the way, that's an eight-hour drive.  You'd better fly.

2. When Kelvin was about 12, he was in a piano concert in Atlanta.  He forgot his lucky shoes, but Mama convinced him to play anyhow.  And they wrote "Barefoot and Praying."  Why does Kelvin's musical talent appear in flashbacks, but never in the present?  He doesn't even own a piano.

3. When Gideon was a baby, he got a fever, and they didn't know if he would make it.  Jesse stayed up all night, holding his hand, and they wrote "Heaven's Thunder," about finding the strength to never give up.  Hey, I'm tearing up. My dad stayed up all night with me once when I was sick.   

This actually proves that Aimee-Leigh loved them, not Lori, but the siblings are moved, and agree to help her contact Eli. 

Big Dick Mitch:  After their lunch,  Eli and Baby Billy get into their car.  Suddenly they get darted, and go unconscious!   Cobb grabbed them in the middle of the afternoon , in the parking lot of a busy restaurant?  

They awaken several hours later, tied up in a concrete room, with a naked, collared man who says he was kidnapped.

Eli: "Are you Big Dick Mitch?"

Baby Billy: "That's an odd thing to comment on."  Dude can't help it if he likes dicks, Baby Billy. Remember, he dated Junior.

Notice that Big Dick Mitch is actually quite small. Lori would know this.  I think Cobb gave him the nickname to embarrass him, and told his son -- uh-oh, Corey is in on it, or at least aware of it and protecting Cobb.

Mitch is played by Regan Burns, an actor and comedian best known as the Dad on Dog with a Blog  He has 83 credits on the IMDB.

Cobb enters and introduces Mitch as "a good boy," using a taser to keep him cowering.  He explains that  "I keep Mitch alive because he entertains me," implying that he usually kills Lori's boyfriends.

He's not sure if he will kill Eli and Baby Billy, or break them down, "see how long it takes you to crack, make y'all my womans."  

"You ain't gonna make me a woman!" Baby Billy exclaims.

"I'll make you whatever I want."  He unzips and pulls it out (unseen).  Mitch whimpers as he starts to lower into position for sucking his dick.  Then suddenly Stacy pages him: "the police are here.  They'd like a word."

Stacy is actually a guy, played by Michael Berthold.  Cobb seems to be promoting traditional hegemonic masculinity with the contention that someone who plays a passive role in same-sex activity is a "woman," yet he doesn't seem bothered by a long-haired, androgynous boy with a girl's name?

Michael Berthold grew up in Apopka, north of Orlando, Florida, and as of this writing is a student at the University of Florida, Gainsville.  He has 28 acting credits on the IMDB, including Billy the Fetus (2016), for which he won a Young Actors Award, and  The Peanut Butter Falcon (2019), where he worked with Shia LaBeouf.

And he owns a Great Dane.

I like him so much that I have been writing fan fiction where he dates Pontius.

More after the break

"Unstable: Rob Lowe and son are grieving, the Pilgrim Twins have small dongs, and there's a gay sycophant

 

 I haven't watched many of Rob Lowe's recent tv shows or movies; I had the impression that he wasn't entirely gay-friendly.  But he stars with his son, John Owen Lowe (below),in the 8-episode Netflix sitcom, Unstable.  I reviewed Episode 4, "Pilgrims and Sex Parties," since sex parties are a gay community thing.  

Premise: "Unstable genius" Ellis (Rob), who owns a biotech company, spirals out of control after the death of his wife (red flag!), so he brings his son Jackson (Johnny) aboard to smooth things out.  Except Jackson is a flautist.  How would that even work?

Scene 1: The biotech company.  A lady in a business suit complains that a photo of Ellis with a hawk on his head has gone viral, creating a meme where he's called the Wizard of Odd.  Ellis doesn't care: he's busy channeling his inner child and monkeys. 

Left: Lowe butt

Meanwhile, the obsessive Smithers to Ellis' Mr. Burns, Malcolm (Aaron Branch), has a meet-cute with the new HR Guy, but is too flustered about HR regulations to flirt.  A gay character in the first scene!  I stand corrected.

Scene 2: Ana, Ellis's main ally on the board of directors, asks how he's handling the grief over his Dead Wife.  Not well , he says: after losing the most wonderful person in the world, life is meaningless. After four episodes?  Usually Dead Wives are mentioned once to establish that the guy is heterosexual, then dropped.  Is this a show about grief?  

"So," Ana says, changing the subject, "About the hawk-on-your-head story, that reporter screwed you in the ass with a King Kong dick?"   Sounds like a fun date, but I think it's just a homophobic reference to the hawk-on-the-head story.

Scene 3:  Ana the Board Member runs into Ellis's son Jackson, the flautist-biotech scientist, and asks how he's handling the grief over his Dead Mother.  Not well;, he says; the grief comes in waves.   She notes that she's still playing the harp, so why doesn't he stop by with his flute for some "pluck and toots."   That sounds dirty.

Scene 4:  In the lab, scientists Luna and Ruby are looking through microscopes, trying to shame some cells into dividing.  They discuss Luna's never-seen "loser" boyfriend Brian and Ruby's ex-boyfriend - Jackson!  A heterosexual flautist?  How odd!

Sycophant Malcolm comes in all flustered over his meet-cute, so the scientists offer to create a litmus test to determine if HR Guy is actually interested. 

Ellis enters the lab, announcing that he's ready to go back to work: "If we can get some reductive oxidant on the anode..."   Uh-oh, he peers into a microscope and starts crying.  Too soon.  Strange -- usually working helps you deal with the grief.  Maybe the Dead Wife was a scientist.  

Scene 5:  Business-Suit Lady approaches the mansion of JT and Chas (JT Parr, Tom Allen, left), who are trying to destroy Ellis.  Boyfriends? No, brothers: they mention their father.  She orders them to back off, or she will post an embarrassing video. 

 "The sex parties?  We don't care -- everybody in tech goes to sex parties."  

No, actually she has a film of the two pretending to be Pilgrims.  If it gets out, no girls will come to their sex parties, so they'll have to have sex with guys.  "Ugh!  Gross!  Ok, we'll back off."  So these are heterosexual sex parties?  I've never heard of such a thing.

More grief after the break

Ryan Masson: Gay actor with one gay role and then "girls! girls! girls!" all the way down. With his d*ck and a bonus Zack Robidas

 

In The Last of Us, Episode 2.4 (2025), some 20 years into the zombie Apocalypse, the Washington Liberation Front ("Wolves') and a death cult called the Seraphites are battling for control of zombie-ravaged Seattle.  Wolf Isaac (Jeffrey Wright) captures  Seraphite Malcolm (Ryan Masson) and tortures him into revealing the location of cult's headquarters.  

It's a brutal scene.  Malcolm is all bloody, so I'm not going to show his face.  But I was interested in his cute little cock.  Maybe we could take a look at Ryan Masson in more aesthetically pleasing roles.

Ryan grew up in Memphis.  He became interested in acting through watching old movies with his grandfather, novelist John Fergus Ryan.

 He played Puck in his middle-school production of A Midsummer Night's Dream and a dandy in A Christmas Carol. although he didn't know what a dandy was.  By high school, he knew, and shied away from the theater, thinking it too "feminine."

At the College of Charleston, Ryan majored in biology and minored in French, planning to go to some isolated locale to researched endangered species.  But the acting bug won out over his fear of being "called gay": he starred in Romeo and Juliet (as Romeo) and Child's Play (about a Catholic school where some of the boys are demon-possessed).  

During his senior year, Ryan starred in the weekly webseries Dank Shadows (2011), a parody of the 1960s Gothic soap opera.  His Marolyn Foddard was a reflection of the vampire, werewolf, and Frankenstein-bedevilled heiress Carolyn Stoddard. 

After graduation, Ryan moved to Los Angeles and enrolled at the California Institute of the Arts, where he received a MFA in acting in 2015.  

He went home for four episodes of  Feral (2016), which is not about werewolves: it's an angst-drama about LGBTQ friends, like Looking but set in Memphis.   He plays the boyfriend of focus character Billy (Jordan Nichols), who suffers from depression.  I guess he wasn't worried about being "called gay" anymore.

His next starring role was Involution (2018), a Russian movie where "the Earth has been sent out of control, affected by a cruel and inhuman mechanism that turns back Darwin's Theory of Evolution."  I don't know what that means, but Ryan's character gets a girlfriend.

A comedic role, sort of, in the "Thelma and Louise" episode of Good Girls (2019), about three suburban housewives who commit crimes.  One of their husbands is interested in killing crime boss Rio (Manny Montana, top photo), so he hires professional assassins PJ and Tobin (Ryan, Travis Mills).  They turn out to be "not what he expected."  

I'll have to check the episode to see if they are a gay couple.

Nope, they talk about "getting all freaky" with chicks.

Left: When I went through the cast list of Good Girls to see if any of the male actors had n*de photos, this popped up.  It's Zack Robidas, who does not appear on the show.

More after the break

Moises Arias: Rico on "Hannah Montana," grows up to play gay characters and show his bum, but is he actually gay? With a hung O'Hearn

 

In 2006, the Disney channel premiered Hannah Montana, about a teenage girl who is secretly a pop star (just go with it).  Hannah was surrounded by a coterie of hunks and hunkoids, including her father Robby (Billy Ray Cyrus), her brother Jackson (Jason Earle), her buddy Oliver (Mitchell Musso), her crush Jake (Cody Linley) -- and Rico Suave (Moises Arias), the billionaire's son, schemer, and prankster who ran Rico's Surf Shop and various other business enterprises.  

Rico's love/hate relationship with Jackson, his employee and classmate, eventually turned to love: they became best friends.  Maybe they were dating in real life, too.  Or maybe Moises was dating Ryan Ochoa, or Jaiden Smith, Will Smith's nonbinary and probably pansexual child.

By the time the series ended in 2011, Moises had become the best and brightest of the Short Guy Brigade: 5'1", muscular, cute, and "obviously" gay.

After Hannah, Moises concentrated on movies and tv shows with gay subtext buddy-bonds or even LGBTQ characters:

In The Kings of Summer (2013), two teenage boys, including Gabriel Basso (left), and their nonbinary, agendered friend Biaggio (Moises) decide to spend the summer together in the wilderness. 

I didn't see Ender's Game (2013), since it was based on a book by homophobic Orson Scott Card, but the plot synopsis suggests a love-hate relationship between far-future space captain Bonzo Madrid (Moises) and Ender (Asa Butterfield).

The Land (2016) features four teenage boys who want to be skateboard champs.

In Ben-Hur (2016), Moises plays Dismas, a Jewish zealot who tries to kill Pontius Pilate from Ben-Hur's balcony.  The guards arrest Ben-Hur, of course, but he loves Dismas too much to betray him.

In Five Feet Apart (2019), he plays a gay disabled guy who lives in a cystic fibrosis ward and facilitates his buddy's heterosexual romance.

He lives in a post-Apocalyptic vault-community and buddy-bonds with a boy in Fallout (2024).

More Moises after the break

Does Kit Harington really have a tiny pecker? And what's wrong with that? With examples of tiny peckers.

 

I never heard of Kit Harington before yesterday, when a reader mentioned that he appears in Season 3 of  Industry.  I was going to do a profile, but got sidetracked by Kit's penis.

I don't like the beard.  He looks better clean-shaven.

Apparently Kit is or was the resident hunk on Game of Thrones.  I only watched ten minutes before being turned by the constant naked ladies, but here he's kissing a guy, so he's played a gay character.

But not in Thrones.  Costar Nicolaj Koster-Waldau notes  “a change in the level of female lust in the room when Kit is there, which all the males find annoying and disrespectful."

First, how can he help it if all the women in the world lust after him?  It's not his fault. 

Second, why do all the males in the world find it annoying.  Surely there's at least one or two gay men on Earth, Nicolaj?

You're from Denmark, which has gay marriage,  and you starred in Bent, about gay men in Nazi Germany.  You played a gay character!  You should know that gay men exist, friggin' homophobe!

I'm already angry with Kit, and he didn't even make the homophobic statement.    

Everyone on the internet thinks that he's got a small dick, due to an article that states that Kit Harington is the reason Jon Snow, presumably his character, has a tiny penis.

But actually the writers "got even" with him for being so attractive -- only to women, of course -- and had someone reference his  character's lack of penile hugeness: "What kind of God would have a pecker that small?

In real life, all we have is this heavily censored j/o session. 

And this photo, from Fleshbot, advertising a "gay make out session" between Kit and Chris Zylka.  Except it's Chris Zylka, whom Kit kisses in The Death and Life of John F. Donovan.

More cocks after the break

The Naked Thugs: Danny McBride thinks we "won't like these dicks." Is that even possible? With chubby guy bonus.

Commenting on the frequent male nudity in the first season of The Righteous Gemstones, Edie Patterson said "We're not gay baiting" (using the term wrong), and Danny McBride (Jesse) claimed that gay men "won't like these dicks." 

Nonsense.  All dicks are beautiful. Big, small, thick, thin, micro, they all draw us toward the power and promise of the male body.  

And the rest of these guys ain't bad, either.

They are a group of thugs hired in Episode 1.3 to take down Eli by destroying his satellite church.  He gets the upper hand and humiliates them by forcing them to run naked through the shopping mall.  

1. Casey Hendershott (top photo), who has played a variety of mobsters, bouncers, rednecks, serial killers, and miscellaneous miscreants.  He didn't show us his junk, but his physique more than makes up for it.

2. Zach Osterman, a Savannah, Georgia-based actor who appeared on Danny McBride's previous show Vice Principals. He's an avid cosplayer, gamer, comic book fan, ghost-tour guide, and pizza expert.  Some people with his physique get fat-shamed and size-shamed, so it took a very positive self image for him to agree to bare it all for Gemstones viewers.  

It was worth it.  He's easily the cutest of the trio.

3. Justin Matthew Smith, who has 29 acting credits on the IMDB, plus a special thanks for the short The Runner.  Nothing wrong with his dick.

The Running of the Butts.  The guys and some extras are forced to run through the mall nude, as the shoppers all laugh at them.

Why is male nudity assumed humorous for the viewer and humiliating for the subject?  If I saw one of these guys running through the mall, I would not be laughing.

 

Bonus chubby guys after the break