Previous: Gemstones Episode 4.6: Kelvin cruises teen idols, Jesse hangs dong, and Cobb gets his cobb bit off. With Ricky Martin and the Italian Stallion
Gator Farm: Close-up of alligaators and scary snakes, then the gift shop (Cobb sells "gemstone necklaces," har har).
Corey (Sean Ryan Fox, in bed with his Henry Danger co-star Jace Norman) is helping close up for the evening. Daddy Cobb asks if he wants to stay for dinner -- he could cook some hot dogs -- but Corey has to go to the mansion and hang out with the Gemstone kids while the parents are out.
"That rich bitch Aimee-Leigh done poisoned your mama's brain!" Cobb sneers.
"It's ok -- I won't even be with her, just with the kids." He begs his Sad Dad to not force him to choose between his parents.
Cut to the Eli, Aimee-Leigh, and Lori getting ready to leave, while the kids are playing Monopoly. Presumably they've already had dinner. Jesse is in charge. "Just promise that you won't burn the house down."
Time Moves Slowly: The adults at dinner at Oakwood. Aimee-Leigh suggests that they sing some of their songs in front of an audience, to see their reaction. Shouldn't you do this before recording?
Later, while Lori is talking to the band, Eli tells Aimee-Leigh that he visited Cobb: the marriage is unsalvageable. They discuss how solid their own marriage is.
Hold My Hand: At home, the kids are singing karaoke. Kelvin's turn: "Kryptonite," by 3 Doors Down (2000). Corey hugs him for:
Meanwhile, Cobb is drinking and feeding his gators.
The Bible Thief: Cut to Corey, Jesse, and Judy at a Mexican restaurant. Cobb calls to see if his son is still at the mansion. "No, we all left to get Mexican food." When they're done, could he drive to Norton Bridge? His truck broke down.
Cobb is actually at the back gate of the Gemstones compound. He puts on a ski mask, climbs over the gate, and tromps through a thunderstorm. He breaks through a window to enter the house. Kelvin, in Judy's room tearing pictures of hot guys from Tiger Beat, hears the noise, thinks that the kids have returned, and runs downstairs.
The Mongolian throat singing in the background is "Wolf Totem," by the metal/folk group The Hu. The lyrics in English translation are heard during the closing credits:
If lions come, we will fight until the end
If you come as snakes, we'll become Garuda birds
If you come as tigers, we'll face you as lions with blue manes
Cobb pees into a booze bottle, steals the Golden Bible and other stuff, and goes through the house, smashing everything he can find. Kelvin watches from the kitchen, then runs to hide in his bedroom. But Cobb smashes the stuff there, too and, hearing a noise, raises the bed. Kelvin screams. Cobb runs out.
Cut to Corey and company at Norton Bridge, waiting to help Cobb with his "stalled truck," wondering why he's not around.
The adults arrive. The house is ransacked, and the kids are gone! They rush through the house calling for them. Aimee-Leigh pulls Kelvin out from under the bed and hugs him. The poor boy is traumatized for life.
Corey Protects His Dad: The police arrive. Judy complains that the intruder tore up her "Teen Hunk" magazines, but Jesse points out that he destroyed all their stuff, and angry-kicks.
Aimee-Leigh says that they have no idea who did it, but "a lot of people don't like us." Ok, now I see the point of the parking-lot debacle: to make the Gemstones think that someone besides Cobb trashed their house.
Corey is sitting at the dining room table by himself, staring into space. Lori asks if he's ok. He lies and says that Cobb had car trouble, so they gave him a jump. Won't that story fall apart if they ask Jesse and Amber?
The Devil's Piss: In the study, Jesse helps himself to a cigar and talks to his Dad about the loss of the Gold-Plated Bible.
About the baby's name: Instead of Stallone, Eli suggests Gideon. His story is in the Book of Judges: he had doubts about following God's commands, but eventually he raised an army, and defeated the Midianites. The people wanted him to become king, but he refused: "There is no king but God." Jesse likes the name.
Aimee-Leigh and Lori inspect the trashed recording studio, and suggest that the intruder "had the Devil in him."
Back in the study, Jesse helps himself to some bourbon. Eli strangely waits until he takes a sip to note that the intruder pissed in it. Call back to Keefe's Episode 4.2 monologue about people drinking the Devil's piss. Now we know who the Devil is -- unless it's a misdirection.
More after the break. Caution: Explicit.