Jake Connelly: Delightful Derek from "Stranger Things" hugs Steve, dates Young Will. With a nude footballer and some ginger chub dicks.

 

Luke Kokotec, who I profiled earlier, notes that his date at the Stranger Things premiere in December 2025 was Jake Connelly, who played Derek. I thought I'd check to see if it was an actual date, or just two buddies who attended on-set school together. 

Maybe it depends on who you ask.

Jake was born in Arlington Heights, Illinois, a suburb of Chicago, and appeared in commercials like "Two for one windows at Feldco!" and "Don't let your roof ruin your summer!", and a short, Between the Silence, about two elderly ladies becoming friends. Showrunner Matt Duffer saw him in a furniture commercial and cast him as one of the next generation of kids who fight the evil Vecna in Stranger Things, Season 5.

He starts out as Dipshit Derek, a bully who harasses Holly Wheeler (younger sister of the first generation's Mike, played by Finn Wolfhard).  He trips people, yells at his mother, and tells various kids and adults to "suck my fat one." 

Left: Artist's interpretation of Mike.

That was supposed to be the end of his character, but the Duffers were so impressed that they gave him a plot arc: he is being groomed by a mysterious being called Mr. Whatsit.

Mike and his friends discover that Mr. Whatsit is actually Vecna in disguise, and recruit him into the battle.  He becomes a hero and rescues Holly, earning the new name Delightful Derek.  Rescuing a girl is a hetero cliche.

When Vecna is finally defeated, Derek hugs Steve Harrington (Joe Keery) and waves excitedly at Mike, whom he calls his "best friend."  Two queer codes.

In the epilogue, he attends Will and Mike's high school graduation (sitting with Holly), then plays Dungeons and Dragons with the new generation (a boy and two girls). Two hetero codes.

A fan favorite, Delightful Derek  goes to a lot of conventions, and is interviewed on a lot of podcasts. He was a guest on The Tonight Show.  His home town decreed February 17th "Stranger Things Day."  In May 2026, he got to throw out the first pitch at a Cubs game.

 

 

With fitness trainer Chase Bandolik. I thought they were pretending to be a romantic couple, but apparently Chase does the "I got invited," "I didn't" stuff with many people.  I don't know what it means.

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Derek's next project, Holiday Touchdown: A Bears Story,  air in December 2026,  It's a Christmas romcom with Robert Buckley as a firefighter whose grandmother has attended 500 Chicago Bears football games (NFL teams generally play 17 games per season, so that's 30 years worth).  He falls for the female reporter assigned to the story.  Presumably Jake plays one of their sons.

More after the break. Caution: Explicit.

Which of the actors named Brandon Stewart is gifted beneath the belt? Gay, straight, Australian, Spanish? With many examples.

 Brandon Stewart appeared on AZ Men showing us his impressive beneath-the-belt gifts, but with no identifying information.  The name sounds familiar, but the only Brandons I've profiled are teen idol Righteous Gemstones guest star Brandon Johnston (below) and teen idol Brandon Spink (bottom photo).

Another photo for reference.

He looks a little like Brandon Johnston, but the entry said Stewart, and there are at least a dozen Brandon Stewart actors out there.

The three who pop up most often in internet searches:

1. Born May 24th in Louisville, Kentucky.  He has 27 acting credits and 36 production credits, but not in anything I have ever heard of: Guess Clue, Drylands, The Brass Rails, Claire Rock Smith. The Dolls, Little Hollywood.

I've gone through his social media posts. He's probably gay, but he looks nothing like our Brandon.

2. Born in Cooper, East Texas. He's got 11 acting credits on the IMDB, none that I've ever heard of: The Sand Dune, Eyewitness Bible Series, The Dead at Night, and Sovereign.  But he says that he got Director of the Year and Best Actor Awards from the Texas Indie Filmmakers.

Social media reveals that he's probably straight, but again, nothing like our Brandon.

More after the break. Caution: Explicit.

The mystery of Genoa leads me to collegiate brothers Gavin and Michael M. One is a swimmer, one has action photos.

 

Often I find a few beefcake photos of an actor online, and download them into a folder to research later.  But this time I have a lot of photos with no identifying information but "Genoa."  Is that his first name, last name, or city?

The file contains several photos of swimming and football teams, all labeled "Genoa."  It looks like our guy is second from the right, in the back row.   

He's not in this photo at all, but the second from the left looks like Christian from New Orleans, whose n*de photo I may have used in an illustration before.

Don't worry, he's over 18.  The cape is because it was Halloween. 

I guess they don't look much alike after all.

The Genoa football team.  Our guy may be second from the left. 

This obviously isn't the city in Italy, and there are 17 cities named Genoa in the U.S.

Left: An Italian guy for reference.

I checked some Genoa football and swimming rosters, did a Google image search, and looked at some of my back files, and...

More after the break

OMG, some jaw-dropping queer codes on "Chad Powers." Russ and Danny are in love! With Zahn butt, Clayne cock, and random Tennessee dudes

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Bridger Buckley: Titan, pizza guy, kidnapped footballer, with a practically perfect physique and a donkey d...or is it a camel?

 

I've been watching The Neighborhood (2018-2025) about two nuclear families who are...um...neighbors, because someone on Reddit said that the femme, long-haired Grover (Hank Greenspan) was gay.  So far he hasn't expressed any interest in men or women, or really interacted with anyone outside the two families.

He doesn't appear in Episode 4.10, "Welcome to Jury Duty," (2022), but in the B-plot, Malcolm and Mary rent out their house for a movie, without realizing that it's going to be a porno.  They watch as the Hot Pizza Guy comes to the door -- and are shocked when he starts stripping off-camera.

Hot Pizza Guy is Bridger Buckley -- great name, attractive face, beautiful physique (pectoral perfection except for a dumb tattoo).  He's got one movie and two tv appearances listed on the IMDB, and I'm going to try to watch all of them.

An article in the Washington State Pullman student magazine provides some biographical details: Bridger Buckley grew up in Snohomish, Washington, a suburb of Seattle.  He was an "angry fat kid" who changed his diet, bulked up, and went out for football. -- Snohomish Panthers, class of 2014.  

He went to Washington State Pullman on a football scholarship, but was hit by a car during his sophomore year, resulting in a concussion and two fractured vertebrae.  It took a long time to recover, but eventually he returned to WSU and the football team.  Another injury, this time a badly sprained ankle, put an end to his football career, but not to his fitness goals.

By 2018, he was ranked #44 in West Coast Men in the Crossfit Games.

In 2019, he competed in The Titan Games, a sports reality show hosted by Dwayne Johnson: Fitness trainers, paramedics, accountants, soccer coaches, and other amateurs with amazing physiques faced Greek mythology-type challenges. 

Bridger won the Hammering Ram and Mount Olympus, permitting him to go on to the Battle of the Titans and win Herculean Pull,  In the season finale, The Titan Championship, he lost the Uprising (pulling an anvil through a series of concrete barriers).

 James-Jean Louis, a truck driver from Miami Beach, was named top male Titan.

After graduating from WSU Pullman in 2019, Bridger pursued a career as a fitness trainer and model.  He won #3 in the Male Commercial Actor of the Year Awards at the IMTA (International Modeling and Talent Association).

And he began auditioning:

1. The Neighborhood (2022)

2. NCIS, Episode 13.10 (2022), "Where Loyalties Lie": A scientist working with the marines is murdered, and her advanced technology stolen, so the NCIS team has to "race against the clock" to catch the baddie.   Bridger has a walk-on.

More after the break

'Chad Powers": A-hole footballer disguised as a college student, with a gay roommate and lots of bare chests. And other bare stuff.

I have no interest in -- or knowledge of -- football, but when the new Hulu series Chad Powers is advertised by two hunks gazing at each other, ready to fight or kiss, what choice do I have?  

Wait -- the two hunks are both Glen Powell, who you recall from Scream Queens and Top Gun: Maverick.  He's playing Russ Holliday, a famous college football player who was cancelled after an altercation with a kid in a wheelchair (and various other a-hole acts).  He schemes to get back into the game by creating a new identity, Chad Powers, and playing for the  struggling Catfish football team at South Georgia College (like, he's catfishing them, har har).  Presumably he'll take classes, too.   

Left: Glenn's butt.

In Episode 1.1, he steals a lot of supplies from his Oscar-winning makeup artist Dad to create the character, goes to the campus, and has a meet-cute with team mascot Danny (Frankie Rodriguez), a fashion-and-pop culture junkie who offers to help him with the deception.  "Your new identity needs to be a modest, likeable guy.  Just play the opposite of yourself."  Danny is also a makeup artist. Dude is obviously gay.  

I'm reviewing Episode 1.2, where Russ tries to maintain his new identity at a party at the coach's lake house -- shirtless hunks are promised.

Scene 1:  Russ and Danny are behind the building, near the dumpsters.  Russ roils at his prosthetic cheeks, but Danny insists: "You have to become Chad Powers. But don't talk much."  Dylan (Jordan Mendoza) arrives with his new identification materials and transcripts, "but I couldn't find him a home address."  No problem, he can stay with Danny.  Tell me more. 

Gross -- there's a bug burrowing into his prosthetic cheek!

Frankie Rodriguez is gay in real life, and has played gay characters in High School Musical: the Series, Modern Family, and Will and Grace.  I'm sure that Danny is gay, too, but they may not give us more than a few hints.

Scene 2:  Football practice.  Subplot involves the fussy Coach (Steve Zahn) and his assistant, secretly his daughter (doubtless also Russ's Love Interest). 

Coach summons Russ/Chad to note a problem with his transcripts: he was homeschooled in West Virginia, in a wilderness surrounded by wolves (nope, no wolves east of Minnesota).  So how did he manage to play high school football?

"Oh, I played...um...with the wolves."

Um...ok.  The Coach needs a winning season, or he'll be fired, so he's willing to suspend his disbelief.

Next Gerry (Colton Ryan), from the scout team and backup, introduces himself.  So far, we have five named male characters.  I'm getting a testosterone high. Who cares what a "scout team" and "backup" are?

80% of the photos Colton Ryan's Instagram show him hugging, kissing, and frolicking with a lady, and the other 20% show her alone, dressed as a man, showing her legs, smooching at the camera.  I'm guessing that he's straight. 

Wait, here's one where he's by himself.

Back to Chad Powers: Gerry teaches Russ/Chad his secret handshake, "a p*ssy symbol, because I get a lot of it."  I know -- I've seen the first 300 pictures on your Instagram. 

Gerry may want to be friends, but the other players ridicule Russ/Chad, especially Bully Nishan (Xavier Mills).

They start the practice.  Russ/Chad screws up and is demoted to backup: "Hey, Flowers for Algernon, this is where you grab this clipboard." Literary reference, har har.

Football research: There are two quarterbacks on each team. The Starting Quarterback is chosen for his ability to draw photo-ops, fawning articles, and hefty donations from boosters.  The Backup does the grunt work while the other players call him names.  But if the Starting Quarterback is injured or traded to another team, won't the Backup take over, and the players who thought he was worthless will have to do what he says? 

On the sidelines, Russ/Chad asks his Love Interest why Coach demoted him to Backup.  "The Starting QB hasn't been decided yet," she assures him.  "Coach wants you and Gerry to compete for the role."  

More after the break.  Caution: Explicit.

Rocky High: My job as an athletic trainer

When I was a kid, I hated sports -- who would willingly submit to having hard round projectiles hurled at them? -- but my parents wouldn't believe me.  "You're a boy!  Boys like sports!" they kept insisting as I unwrapped Christmas presents of basketballs and baseball bats.

Denkmann Elementary School didn't offer gym classes, so they insisted that I choose something from the Parks & Recreations Department "Kids' Sports" program.  So I took judo for three years, stopping only when the dojo moved across the river to Davenport.

Washington Junior High offered a full range of team sports, so they began pushing me toward baseball, basketball, or...shudder...football. I compromised with wrestling, but dropped out after an unfortunate penis incident during a match. 

When I was about to start tenth grade at Rocky High, home of the Rocks, the litany began again: play a sport, play a sport, play a sport.  With even more urgency, since a boy with an aversion to athletics might be a "swish."  My Dad even forced me to try out for junior varsity football!

Noticing my dismay, my gym teacher, who was also the football coach, came up with another idea.  He asked if I had my Red Cross First Aid certificate.  I did. Then he suggested that I might like a job as an athletic trainer.

What do they do?

Duties after the break