Jesse Bradford: The gay and gay-subtext roles of yesteryear have vanished, but he still has a physique. And a cock.
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"Ghosts," Episode 3.10: A gay wedding, a gay performer, a vengeful Puritan, a naked Viking, and a lot of plot complications
In the British version of Ghosts (2019-23), the gay ghost is closeted, with a "disgraceful secret" that he never reveals to his housemates. I heard that the American version (2021-25) was better at gay representation, so I watched Episode 3.10, "Isaac's Wedding"
The Premise: Sam (a woman) and Jay (Utkarsh Ambudkar) inherit a house filled with the ghosts of people who have died there or nearby, and for some reason can't move on to the afterlife. Since she was dead for a few minutes after an accident, Sam can see and hear them, but Jay can't.
Nigel (John Hartman, right), a British soldier who died during the Revolutionary War, has been in a relationship with Isaac (Brandon Scott Jones, left), the Continental soldier who he killed (by accident)). They are going to get married today, but Isaac is worried about his ongoing fantasy about Chris, the adult performer hired for his bachelor party (the humans told him that he was performing for an empty room).
Isaac asks Sassapis (Roman Zaragosa), a Native American who died in the 16th century, about his attraction to the stripper. Sassapis reassures him that it's just cold feet.
The DJ hired to play at the wedding arrives -- and to everyone's surprise, it's Chris (Deniz Akdeniz)! He's gay, he hates the show Hamilton, and he has no sense of smell -- all points in his favor. When he eats crab and has an allergic reaction, Isaac secretly wishes that he will die, so they can date -- but he survives.
Meanwhile Peter (Richie Moriarty), a 1980s scout leader who accidentally shot an arrow through his neck, has discovered that he can leave the house by poltergeisting family members, so he follows his descendants to a Caribbean vacation, and meets a female ghost from his time period. They have a passionate affair, but then he starts to evaporate.
Back at the house, the wedding begins, with Sassapis officiating. As Nigel and Issac exchange vows, Peter returns from the Caribbean, finds that he is whole again, and interrupts with his shout of jubiliation. He tells the story of his trip and the intensity of his love, and Isaac realizes that there's something missing in his relationship with Nigel. He backs out at the last minute.
Not noticing, lounge singer Alberta, who was poisoned during the Prohibition Era, starts singing "At Last" anyway. Nigel runs off crying.
Later, Isaac's housemates agree with his decision. He's 300 years old, and he's been out for only a few years, so he shouldn't rush into a relationship right away. He needs time to grow.
More after the break
Matt Smith: Who doesn't want to see the penis of Prince Philip, Charles Manson, Christopher Isherwood, Superworm, and Dr. Who?
We've been watching the 2011 series of Doctor Who, the seemingly endless British sci-fi series that sends the last remaining Time Lord through time and space to save Earth, an alien planet, or the entire universe. Again and again. Oddly, when his world-saving takes him to modern day Britain, there are plenty of exteriors, but when it is a distant planet or the far future, all we see are endless corridors.
Doctors regenerate every few years, getting new bodies and personalities. Right now it's Matt Smith, an effervescent, jokey type, with an inner trauma that sometimes comes out. After all, he saw the destruction of his people, and he's over 1,000 years old, so dozens of human companions have died, gotten lost, or left him to go on with their lives.
Matt Smith has appeared as the Doctor in dozens of projects outside the show itself: videos exploring odd corners of his universe, video games, a lot of four-episode miniseries, spin-offs starring former companions Sarah Jane and Amy Pond
The children's program Blue Peter.
Comic Relief: Red Nose Day, An Adventure in Time and Space...I got tired of counting. You have to be British to really understand his amazing popularity.
The Doctor would be enough for a career, but Matt has played a wide range of other characters, mostly based on real people:
Prince Philip, the consort of Queen Elizabeth, in The Crown, 2016-7.
Plus a variety of fictional characters. As far as I can tell, they're all heterosexual. I guess he only takes gay roles if they're of historical significance.
The case worker of a refugee family facing evil
The Doctor would be enough for a career, but Matt has played a wide range of other characters, mostly based on real people:
Christopher Isherwood, the gay author of A Passage to India and Maurice, in Christopher and His Kind, a 2011 adaption of his memoirs. Left, the one without the biceps.
Rowing star Bert Bushnell in Bert & Dickie, 2012. Neither was gay.
Prince Philip, the consort of Queen Elizabeth, in The Crown, 2016-7.
Robert Maplethorpe, the controversial gay artist, in Mapplethorpe: The Director's Cut , 2018
Left, the one with the ring
Hippie cult leader Charles Manson in Charlie Say, 2018
Plus a variety of fictional characters. As far as I can tell, they're all heterosexual. I guess he only takes gay roles if they're of historical significance.
A detective fighting witchcraft.
An evil clone with a nice bulge.
A zombie-fighting parson in the Regency era.
The case worker of a refugee family facing evil
An evil spirit in the psychedelic 60s
A tourist in Morocco for whom things go terribly wrong
More Matt after the break
The Jonas Brothers: I wanna be like you
But after that the group was a Disney Channel juggernaut, recording new versions of movie classics like "I Want to Be Like You" (from The Jungle Book), appearing on Hannah Montana and Camp Rock, and finally getting two tv series of their own, The Jonas Brothers: Living the Dream (2008-2010) and Jonas (2009-2010).
Like most boy bands, their lyrics were heterosexist, with lots of "girl! girl! girl!" But some dropped pronouns. And their version of "I Wanna Be Like You" sounds decidedly homoerotic:
What I desire is man's red fire
To make my dream come true
Give me the secret, mancub
Clue me what to do
Give me the power of man's red flower
So I can be like you
I wouldn't mind getting a little of that power of man's red flower myself.
The brothers are gay allies. In an interview with The Advocate in 2012, Nick (left) noted that they loved their gay fans: "They’ve been incredible over the years. My brothers and I totally look forward to meeting them, because they really respond to our style."
In 2013 they appeared on the cover of Out magazine.
Their boy band days are long past, but Jonas Brothers are stil performing together. Joe has also embarked on a solo career, and appeared as himself in tv shows like Dash and Lily and The Righteous Gemstones.
Joe nude, sort of, after the break
Gemstones Episode 2.7: Holding hands among the yurts and eating pizza for desserts. With a nude Jonathan Bennett bonus
Previous: Episode 2.6, Continued: Torsten gets it up, Keefe holds Kelvin's dick, and Sky is skyclad
In the last episode, Kelvin and Keefe were ejected from the God Squad and kicked out of their house, and Eli was shot several tis and crashed his car. Gulp, he's dead!
Title: "And Infants Shall Rule Over Them." Isaiah 3.4: "I will make boys their princes, and infants shall rule over them." Isaiah is describing the upcoming collapse of Jerusalem after social roles are overturned. We're going to see Jesse and Kelvin as princes here, with their Daddy gone.
When you get tired of discussing erections: Whew, Eli's not dead after all, but he's in a coma. Jesse/Amber and Judy/BJ hug and cry at his bedside. Kelvin is noticeably absent. Then the siblings go out into the parking lot and throw up multiple times. followed by the partners. Is this a common response to grief, or did they all have bad sushi for dinner?
Sky didn't really want a blow job, or he would have waited for Keefe to move his mouth into position. He wanted to tease Keefe, demonstrating what he couldn't have. The God Squad guys laugh and high-five each other. In gay communities, and actually among heterosexuals also, the person who performs fellatio is often denigrated, considered physically and socially inferior. Keefe's activity with Kelvin apparently brands him as "a bottom."
"We are ejecting," Kelvin answers. "We'll move in with the rest of the family in the safe house." They run from the Tiger Cage hand in hand, then through the yard to freedom.
This is a significant scene: Kelvin admits that Keefe is a member of the family, and invites a public display of affection that establishes them as a romantic couple. A scene ago he yelled at Keefe for trying to hold his hand. Now he initiates it.
Pizza and Cycle Ninjas: At the safe house, Keefe goes to work on embedding himself into the family. First he advises Kelvin to visit his father (and calls him Brother instead of the formal Brother Kelvin). Then he tries to distract Jesse's kids from the crisis with what he thinks are funny stories. While they are eating pizza, he notes that as a young boy, he often had pizza for every meal, even for dessert. That's not funny, it's sad. Where were your parents?
Ok, we're not tired of discussing erections yet: We cut to Keefe trapped in the God Squad's tiger cage. There are several openings to look through, but he prefers the glory hole, as if awaiting his next cock. This time, Sky (Joel Rush, top photo) pushes through, hitting him in the eye!
Sky didn't really want a blow job, or he would have waited for Keefe to move his mouth into position. He wanted to tease Keefe, demonstrating what he couldn't have. The God Squad guys laugh and high-five each other. In gay communities, and actually among heterosexuals also, the person who performs fellatio is often denigrated, considered physically and socially inferior. Keefe's activity with Kelvin apparently brands him as "a bottom."
Keefe collapses, screaming in pain, and starts to cry. He has died and gone to hell, being punished for Kelvin's sins -- a veritable Christ figure. Note that Keefe undergoes a symbolic death and resurrection in every season.
When the God Squad guys leave, Kelvin appears with food and toiletries. Interestingly, Keefe calls him by the formal "Brother Kelvin." He isn't sure that he wants a romantic relationship with this guy who lets him suffer in a tiger cage instead of saying "Game's over! Let Keefe out!" and calling security if the God Squad resists. But Christ-Keefe doesn't even suggest release; instead, he advises Kelvin that he's as powerful as Eli, just as Jesus was as powerful as his Father.
Beauty and the Beast: In church, Jesse announces that Eli was gunned down while driving on Long Point Road.
Geography note: This is a real road in a suburb of Charleston. It leads past the Seacoast Church, a megachurch that closely resembles the Salvation Center.
Afterwards, the family is at their post-church dinner at Jason's Steakhouse, when Kelvin arrives, wearing a dark purple robe, carefully holding his glass of orange drink.
They yell at him for not being around late;y, but he isn't ready to show himself in public yet. "I am a beast!" Jesse quips that the robe makes him look like the beauty from Beauty and the Beast.
Next they argue over who will fill the power vacuum left by Eli's absence, until Martin has had enough: "Can't you just be kind to each other? Self-absorbed, loud, arrogant fucking assholes." That's about the size of it.
Kelvin agrees:"Y'all are a bunch of a-holes." Jesse points out that he was talking about "you, too, dick-lips." The term refers to lips that would be especially nice to receive fellatio from: a call-back to the glory hole scene earlier, and yet another reference to Kelvin being gay.
The Return of Baby Billy: After scenes where Judy promises to become a better person and Gideon announces that he's leaving to take a stunt job, BJ and Tiffany track Baby Billy's movements from his credit card statement. He's in Winston-Salem, spending money at Sbarro, Bojangles, Tommy Hilfinger, Aeropostale, and the Fossil Watch Store.
Timeline alert: the dates were all in mid October, 2022. This episode aired on February 13, 2022.
Tiffany can sound out most of the words; apparently BJ has been teaching her to read. He has become a father figure.
In Winston-Salem, Baby Billy is recording a commercial for his new scam, a coconut-flavored health elixir that will cure every disease, even COVID. Dude, that's false advertising, a criminal offense. On his way out of the studio, BJ, Judy, and Tiffany accost him. First he tries to hide; then he claims that he was trying to make money to support Tiffany and their son; then he assaults BJ and runs away.
Jesse's Plan: After discussing the possibility of blowing up Junior's house and having a heart-to-heart with Martin, Jesse reveals to the siblings his new plan: he'll tell the congregation and the news media that Eli is recovering, and give them his hospital and room number, so the listening Cycle Ninjas will know to where to strike again. Except Eli won't be there: Jesse will clear the hospital and lay in wait, ready to gun them down. Can you really clear an entire hospital? The siblings think that it's a crazy idea, but he talks them into it: "Let's lie to the church like a fucking family."
Cut to the ambulances and army jeeps moving Eli to the safe house. Which happens to be his own mansion; is that wise? Judy, Amber, and the kids join him.
On the third day he rose from the dead: Meanwhile, Keefe sneaks back to the God Squad compound and tells Keefe: "I'm busting you out of here."
Wait. When Eli visited, Keefe was already in the tiger cage. Then he was shot, and they announced that he was in a coma in the Sunday service. IT'S SUNDAY AGAIN! Has Keefe been in that cage for over a week? That would be inconceivably brutal. Besides it wouldn't fit with the Christ motif: Keefe has to descend "into hell" on Friday, and get resurrected on Sunday. I think there is a problem with the show's continuity.
"Are we taking back the house?" Keefe asks. I'd be asking a lot more than that, just before I called the police and my lawyer.
"We are ejecting," Kelvin answers. "We'll move in with the rest of the family in the safe house." They run from the Tiger Cage hand in hand, then through the yard to freedom.
Notice that Kelvin does not have an instrumental reason for offering his hand: Keefe is already standing. It is purely a gesture of affection..
This is a significant scene: Kelvin admits that Keefe is a member of the family, and invites a public display of affection that establishes them as a romantic couple. A scene ago he yelled at Keefe for trying to hold his hand. Now he initiates it.
Question: Keefe is wearing only a jockstrap. Where do they intend to find clothes? Kelvin had to move their stuff out of the master bedroom suite, but it would still be in the house, right?
Pizza and Cycle Ninjas: At the safe house, Keefe goes to work on embedding himself into the family. First he advises Kelvin to visit his father (and calls him Brother instead of the formal Brother Kelvin). Then he tries to distract Jesse's kids from the crisis with what he thinks are funny stories. While they are eating pizza, he notes that as a young boy, he often had pizza for every meal, even for dessert. That's not funny, it's sad. Where were your parents?
Personal note: My aunt is only ten years older than me, so I remember her in high school, bringing boyfriends around. They would invariably try to score points by telling inane "funny" stories.
We cut to Kelvin visiting the comatose Eli. He admits that the God Squad was kind of dumb, but he just started it to make Eli proud. And invite a lot of musclemen to the steam showers. He prays, promising to "never succumb to hubris again" if God heals Eli. And Eli speaks! A miracle! The end.
Oh, right, we still have 15 minutes to go. Jesse, the men in the family, and the mercenaries waiting in the cleared hospital. Four Cycle Ninjas appear, armed with rifles. One is shot, and the others flee. Jesse follows, knocks a second off his motorcycle, and shoves a taser up his butt, enacting an anal rape. Gideon chases and subdues the others. The end.
Shaun Lynch and Jonathan Bennett after the break
Theo James: Why is he naked all the time, and has he done anything gay-positive?
In White Lotus Season 2, Cameron and Ethan (Theo James, Will Sharpe) and their wives visit the Italian resort, and start flirting with every woman in sight, plus each other. In Episode 4, Cameron even says "I want to be inside you. I want to do stuff to you." But it is just queerbaiting; the two never lock lips. In fact, they hate each other.
You could probably figure that White Lotus, well known for its shocking homophobia, would never portray an actual gay romance. After all, it was created and written by Mike White, aka The Devil.
But Theo James is not personally homophobic; he has been interviewed an a dozen gay magazines, he wants to play a gay action-adventure hero, and he was in the running to play gay pop star George Michael. Let's check his previous work for gay roles.
The Time Traveler's Wife (2022) features (straight) lovers stymied by the guy's frequent involuntary time slips. Heterosexuals all the way down, although it does give us some nice rear and frontal nudity.
Sanditon (2019-22) is an adaption of a novel that Jane Austen left unfinished at her death in 1817. There is actually a gay character, outed in the second season. Theo plays Sidney Parker, whom focus character Charlotte love/hates with the "He's arrogant!" trope.
In the animated Castlevania (2018-21), Theo plays Hector, whose plot is propelled by that horribly cliched Dead Wife Trope.
Archive (2020)? Another guy with a Dead Wife, who he tries to recreate with an android. Yawn. I'm beginning to think that it will be tired cliches as well as heterosexuals all the way down. Are the butts and dicks worth the trouble?
Lying and Stealing (2019)? Caper romance between two thieves.
How it Ends (2018)? "In the midst of an Apocalypse, a man struggles to reach his pregnant fiance, who is a thousand miles away." That's actually the motive behind about half of the characters on The Walking Dead: "I'm looking for my wife!"
Before The White Lotus, Theo was most famous for the Divergent series, four movies set in a teen dystopia where people are classified according to their primary virtue: Candor, Dauntless, Erudite, Abnegation, and Amity. He plays Four, a Dauntless instructor who romances focus character Beatrice.
Ok, let's try Theo's future projects. In the upcoming The Gentleman (2024), he plays Eddie Halsted, who inherits his father's estate without realizing that it is the front for a drug empire. And he...falls in love...with...
I give up.
Bonus: Theo dick after the break
Alex Saxon: From fundamentalist Missouri to ace and trans roles to androgynous teen angst hunk. With his n*de older brother
A new Righteous Gemstones character has appeared in the Episode 4.1 cast list, Alex Saxon as "Thaddeus," no doubt a Civil War guy.
According to Alex Saxon's biography on the IMDB, he was born in 1987 in Liberty, Missouri, 15 miles north of Kansas City, began acting in the theater at age 8.
A femme appearance, in the theater, and living in Liberty, Missouri. I can't imagine how terrible the bullying was.
He sang, danced, and sometimes acted in Bye Bye Birdie, Jekyll& Hyde: The Musical, Grease, A Charlie Brown Christmas, and The Breakfast Club Live
After high school, he enrolled at William Jewell College as a pre-med major, but then changed to Psychology and Applied Critical Thought, with a minor in Chemistry. He graduated magna cum laude in 2009.
He hit Los Angeles in 2011, and began acting for the screen:
The William Jewell College in Liberty is affiliated with the Baptist Church, so I imagine that it's not at all gay friendly.
He hit Los Angeles in 2011, and began acting for the screen:
A vampire guy at the Big Dance in an episode of Awkward (2011).
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Coin Heist (2017), about four teens -- "the hacker, the slacker, the athlete, and the perfect student," who scheme to steal from the U.S. Mint. Alex, with relatively short hair, plays the Slacker, who is the ex-boyfriend of the Perfect Student (a girl, of course) and falls in love with the Hacker (a girl, of course). Not to worry, the Perfect Student hooks up with the Athlete (a boy, of course), so everything is all tied up into a nice little heteronormative package.
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36 episodes of the teen angst series Finding Carter (2014-15) as the on-off boyfriend of Carter's sister.
The Olivia Experiment (2012): A woman suspects that she is asexual, so she accepts a friend's offer of sex with her own boyfriend to find out. That is wrong on so many levels. You know whether you're into sex or not without actually having it. That's like the people who ask "How do you know you don't like sex with women unless you've tried it?" Easy...look at a woman, and ask yourself "Do you want to have sex with her?"
Alex plays a member of the Asexual Support Group, where Olivia is informed that she's not really asexual, she's just afraid to open up to intimacy.
Young Paul Holt in Chapman (2013), which seems to be a Western.
Young Henry Bird in The Advocates (2013), which seems to be about lawyers
Chloe in two episodes of Ray Donovan (2013-2015): a "transvestite" hooker who is blackmailing movie star Tommy (Austin Nichols) to get money for "a sex change." What is this, 1975? The vocabulary is all wrong. Transgender people don't get "sex changes," they transition.
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Coin Heist (2017), about four teens -- "the hacker, the slacker, the athlete, and the perfect student," who scheme to steal from the U.S. Mint. Alex, with relatively short hair, plays the Slacker, who is the ex-boyfriend of the Perfect Student (a girl, of course) and falls in love with the Hacker (a girl, of course). Not to worry, the Perfect Student hooks up with the Athlete (a boy, of course), so everything is all tied up into a nice little heteronormative package.
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Then it's back to long hair for 28 episodes of the teen angst series The Fosters (2013-18), as Callie's on-off boyfriend
36 episodes of the teen angst series Finding Carter (2014-15) as the on-off boyfriend of Carter's sister.
10 episodes of The Fix (2019) as the stepson of Sevvy Johnson (Adewale Akinnouye-Agbaje), an actor accused of murdering two of his girlfriends. He assaults his father, gets into fights, and does other deviant stuff while dating girls.
62 episodes of Nancy Drew(2019-23), as a drug-addled outsider who becomes one of the teen sleuth's scoobies and dates girls.
An episode of Criminal Minds as Pete Bailey, younger brother of the murdered Deputy Director Doug Bailey (Nicholas D'Agosto, left).
Noticing a pattern in Alex's screen presence? Long hair, soft, feminine, gay-coded in spite of his characters' endless series of girlfriends.
He doesn't have Instagram, and his X just promotes his tv series, so his personal life is up for speculation. LezWatch calls him cisgender heterosexual, but that may just be default.
Could he be gay in real life?
More after the break
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