Brian Cage and Lance Hoyt, the "Disclosure Day" demi-gods: Which has nude photos? Which is gay? WIth Riddle rising and Oberst pretending

Disclosure Day (2026), about aliens finally announcing their presence to the world (after hanging around since the Roswell Crash of 1947), offers beefcake only in the first scene.  Danny (Josh O'Connor) stole tapes demonstrating the aliens' presence, and Boss Hogg of the Evil Corporation kidnapped his girlfriend to get them back.  They want to make the trade at a wrestling match.  

I haven't posted a profile of a muscleman for a long time, so I thought I would research the wrestlers, Brian Cage (blue) and Lance Hoyt (red).

Brian Cage, civilian name Brian Button, works for Lucha Underground and Impact Wrestling. Sometimes he performs as Mortis as an homage to his friend Chris Kanyon, who created the character.  As a bodybuilder, he won the 2026 Mr. Nevada competition.

 Other than wrestling shows, he has appeared in:

A fan film, The Fall of Greyskull  (2015), playing He-Man.

The Bloody Man (2020), about a boy who accidentally summons a monster.  Brian plays "Barbarian Man."

And Kill City Cup (2023): A sort of cage-fighting Hunger Games.  He plays a wrestler. 

Brian's Instagram consists almost entirely of selfies, photos from his wrestling and bodybuilding performances, and ladies with big breasts. I got the distinct impression that he is straight.   

Yep, the pro wrestling website tells us that he is married to Melissa Santos, a ring announcer and television personality who works with him in the Lucha Underground.

But at least we have a nude photo.

Or two.

More after the break

Lance Hoyt, known professionally as Lance Archer and Vance Archer, works for the WWE.  He also performs as Murderhawk Monster in the AEW (All Elite Wrestling).  Other than wrestling shows, he has appeared in:

Time to Fight (2017): A young man takes his brother's place in an underground fight club.  Lance plays Percy. 

The Suplex Duplex Company (2017): Four tag-team wrestlers struggle to live as roommates.

Minos Records (2018): An abusive husband is brought to justice, presumably by the Beast (Lance).

Lance's Instagram contains no photos of women, or kids other than his nephews.  Instead, he posts photos of men, sometimes in blatantly erotic poses.

"Wait until the match is over, buddy." 

And a lot of same-sex social activities.  This looks like a double date, Lance and his boyfriend with a hetero couple.

Lance and another dude having dinner with his trainer and "Japanese nephews."  

Wait -- according to the pro wrestling website, Lance has been married to Tessa since 1995, with three kids and two grandkids.  He just keeps them out of his social media so he can pretend that he gets down with dudes.  I guess it makes him seem more macho.

Robert Oberst does the same thing.

Lance hasn't posted any nude photos, so here's WWE wrestler Matt Riddle.

See also: Disclosure Day: Incessant heterosexism as the aliens announce their existence, 26 years too late. With Tommy dick and Boss Hogg butt

Robert's Hot/Hung Photos, Part 2: Beefy boyfriend, helicopter penis, and strongman sex

Peter Kaasa: The hottest man in professional wrestling. With bonus nude wrestlers

Blue Ridge Episode 1.3: A wrestling promoter is murdered at a high school in the Hills. With lots of beefy suspects and Michael O'Hearn's dick