The Naked Thugs: Danny McBride thinks we "won't like these dicks." Is that even possible? With chubby guy bonus.

Commenting on the frequent male nudity in the first season of The Righteous Gemstones, Edie Patterson said "We're not gay baiting" (using the term wrong), and Danny McBride (Jesse) claimed that gay men "won't like these dicks." 

Nonsense.  All dicks are beautiful. Big, small, thick, thin, micro, they all draw us toward the power and promise of the male body.  

And the rest of these guys ain't bad, either.

They are a group of thugs hired in Episode 1.3 to take down megachurch pastor Eli by destroying his satellite church, set up in a shopping mall.  He gets the upper hand and humiliates them by forcing them to run naked through the mall. 

 

1. Casey Hendershott (top photo) has played a variety of mobsters, bouncers, rednecks, serial killers, and miscellaneous miscreants.  He didn't show us his junk, but his physique more than makes up for it.

2. Zach Osterman, a Savannah, Georgia-based actor, appeared on Danny McBride's previous show Vice Principals. He's an avid cosplayer, gamer, comic book fan, ghost-tour guide, and pizza expert.  Some people with his physique get fat-shamed and size-shamed, so it took a very positive self image for him to agree to bare it all for Gemstones viewers.  

It was worth it.  He's easily the cutest of the trio.

3. Justin Matthew Smith has 29 acting credits on the IMDB, plus a special thanks for the short The Runner.  Nothing wrong with his dick.

The Running of the Butts: The guys and some extras running through the mall, while the shoppers laugh at them.

Why is male nudity assumed humorous for the viewer and humiliating for the subject?  If I saw one of these guys running through the mall, I would not be laughing.

 

Bonus chubby guys after the break

Gabriel Avellar: Brazilian child actor plays two queer-coded boys, Loki, a puppy, and a fruit. And performs as Elton John. With two co-star cocks and a bj

 

Another guy I never heard of before: Gabriel Avellar, a Brazilian child actor who suddenly topped the Teen Idols List.  He seemed a little young for a profile, but out or curiosity, I checked his Instagram.  

A few queer-coded photos: hugging adult hunks, swishing it up as gay icon Elton John...wait, he posts a clip from one of his tv shows depicting a remarkable gay subtext scene.  Time to take a closer look.  

Gabriel's first acting role listed on the IMDB is in the  children's telenovela A Caverna Encantada (The Enchanted Cave, 2024), which seems to be about a boarding school with dark secrets (as dark as a show for preteens can go). 

 Felipe (Gabriel) is a garoto-problema, always getting into trouble, pretending that he doesn't care about anyone or anything, not even his queer-coded femme buddy Rui  (Théo Radicchi, right)-- until his façade falls.  

Gabriel (or his parent) tells us: "Felipe brings the reality of so many children who are not understood. Those who only saw the tantrums, did not see the suffering..of this character so rich and beloved"

  In later episodes Felipe joins a secret society, Os Luises, and helps uncover the secrets of the school.  

In the gay-subtext scene, quiet, shy Moises (Diego Laumar) is very angry with Felipe, yells at him, and starts crying (I completed the Duolinguo Portuguese course, but I still can't understand what he's saying).  Felipe tentatively approaches, and they hug. 

Gabriel comments: "In the end Felipe surrenders: Too exciting!"  Surrenders to what?  His romantic feelings?  Was Moises upset because Felipe rejected him?

He also posts a photo of Felipe heart-to-hearting with Professor Gabriel (Miguel Coelho), and comments: "Student and teacher, master and disciple, but primarily friends! He is the only one who believes in Felipe, and supports his transformation.  And scenes like these always provide strong emotions!"  Transformation to good guy, or recognizing that he is gay?

Miguel Coelho is a versatile actor.

Next Gabriel appeared in the animated movie Abá e Sua Banda (2024), about "a kingdom of fruits." (Okay...) Abá (Filipe Bragança, right), the young Pineapple Prince, wants to start a band and play at the Music Festival, but instead he is drawn into the fight against the evil Prime Minister Coconut,  In the end he establishes a democracy in the Tutti-Frutti Kingdom (Okay....), a place "where fruits of all colors and flavours will fit."  Maybe it's not as gay in Portuguese.

Gabriel plays his friend Coquinho, named after the fruit of the jelly palm.

More after the break

Kampan Soni: Czech-Indian boy plays a ghost-chaser and a bartender, jokes about cats, doesn't mention girls. With potential nude photos

Ride or Die on Amazon Prime, features a professional assassin named Judith, being pushed out of the business due to her age, who discovers that baddies are targeting an MP (that's Member of Parliament, to Yanks) and his wife, Debbie.  Who happens to be her "ride or die" (best friend) 

  

I reviewed the first episode.  Not a fan. 

Not much beefcake. We see Judith's hookup (Taylor Napier, left) shirtless, and her mark (Ed Skrein) coming out of the shower. 

No gay characters,  Calum Lynch as Judith's handler gives off a gay vibe, but he flirts with a girl.

Even crowd scenes display endless arrays of male-female couples. 

And there's a nasty bit of queerbaiting.  In an antique warehouse, the PM's wife Debbie gets to a prized apothecary cabinet before celebrity antique dealer Drew Pritchard and his boyfriend.  They fume with envy.  Except the real-life guy is straight.  They just pretended he was gay to fool viewers. 

The only bright spot was Kampan Soni as the cute bartender who Debbie complains to as she downs tequila after tequila.

Kampan grew up in Ahmendabad, in Gujarat State in western India, and graduated from St. Xavier High School in 2018.

He then moved to Prague to attend the Czech University of Life Sciences, where he received a B.Sci. in Agriculture and Food Sciences in 2022.  He is currently a Global Mobility Specialist at  Amazon Prague, which seems to involve Human Resources.

Plus he does comedy povs: "Making you question things you never noticed: Facts, Psychology, Hidden History"

"Why does the ATM pin have only four digits?"

"What do cats really think about?" 

"Why do we like horror movies?"

"Why are popcorns so expensive?"

More after the break.  Caution: Explicit.

Nicolas Bechtel: Soap opera prince and Stuck twin femmes up, hot tubs with hunks, still believes. With two Prince prongs and a Cole cock

 

The next person in my "Profiles to Do" folder that I've never heard of: Nicolas Bechtel.  I get a positive vibe from his name due to the lesbian cartoonist Allison Bechdel, whose Bechdel Test measures women's representation in movies.

But I'm sure he has no connection to that.

According to Wikipedia, Nicolas was born in 2005 in Fontana, California, and is best known as Spencer Cassidine on General Hospital and Lewis Diaz on Stuck in the Middle.

Prince Spencer Cassidine was born in 2006, son of Greek prince Nicholas Cassidine (Tyler Christopher, left).  He began his life fighting, born  premature and infected with the deadly virus that was rampant in Port Charles. As a baby he goes through a paternity test, kidnapping, attempted murder, and his dad's near-fatal illness (it's General Hospital, after all).  

Nicolas plays Spencer from 2013 to 2020: he is  trapped in a fire and severely burned, kidnapped twice more, and sent to juvenile hall after stalking his mother.  

A 2020-24 Spencer, played by Nicholas Chavez, is attacked by the Hook Killer, beaten into unconsciousness, and kidnapped again.  Finally he drowns in the River Seine (or maybe not).  

He is heterosexual, with four girlfriends at various times. 

The Disney Channel's Stuck in the Middle (2016-18) stars Jenna Ortega as Harley Diaz, an engineering prodigy who is "stuck in the middle," third of seven children. She has three brothers, aspiring singer Ethan (Isaak Presley) and the twins Lewie (Nicolas) and Beast (Malachi Barton).  Neither of the twins seem to have any heterosexual crushes, according to the episode synopses and fan wiki.

Left: Malachi Barton has muscled up.

Nicholas has 14 other acting credits on the IMDB, including episodes of Good Luck Charlie, Baby Daddy, Girl Meets World, and American Crime Story.

He's got a 7-episode run in Rake (2014), with Greg Kinnear as a defense attorney who gets beat up a lot. 

Two movies:

The List (2013), not to be confused with The List (2013): Michael Peña stars as an FBI agent tracking down a killer who is targeting everyone on a list of people in the Witness Protection Program.  Gary Cole (left) plays his boss. Nicolas plays a kid. 

More after the break