Hector Garcia: The um...androgynous kid from "Everybody Hates Chris" has a husband...I mean good buddy....and a cock

 

Everybody Hates Chris (2005-09), with comedian Chris Rock narrating his childhood experiences in the 1980s.  Sure, it had a lot of beefcake, with Dad Terry Crews and brother Tequan Richmond (left).  At least in the first two seasons, there was a strong gay-subtext romance between Young Chris (Tyler James Williams, who as an adult strongly defends himself against gay "accusations") and Greg (Vincent Martella, who is gay but was not out at the time).    But there were frequent homophobic digs, for no apparent reason than to invite the audience to share the grown-up Chris's homophobia.

At a party, two long-haired people kissing, and the grown-up Chris exclaims "I sure hope that's a girl!"  If it makes you uncomfortable, why include it in the scene?

When the grown-up Chris thinks that Young Chris and Greg are getting too close, he exclaims exclaims "Hey, this ain't Brokeback!"  So you're expressing homophobia at yourself as a boy? You got issues, dude.

No gay people appear or are mentioned; the closest they dared come was Angel (Hector A. Garcia).

In Episode 4.2, "Everybody Hates Cake," Chris signs up for a home economics class as a way to get close to the Girl of His Dreams Remember, heteronormativity dictates that the teenage boy has only one motive for every action: to get girls.  He is partnered with femme boy Angel, who is besties with the Girl but can't cook.  That's why you take the class, nimrod.  Maybe they could help each other, an introduction in exchange for cooking lessons?   

The femme mannerisms make Chris extremely uncomfortable, but --winning the Girl!  Dad advises him that some men are...um...er...androgynous.  But they can't help it.  You shouldn't shun someone for something that's not their fault.  So he agrees, but when he starts to like Angel and asks to hang out, the snobbish jerk rejects him.  They can't help it, so you shouldn't shun them.  That's as gay positive as Chris gets.

I wanted to know about the actor playing the um...er...androgynous Angel,  Hector A. Garcia.  Is he...um...er... androgynous in real life?

First, any...um...er...androgynous roles?

Hector grew up in Pacoima, California, just north of Burbank.  He is a "Proud Valley Boy" and "professional couch potato."  His acting career begins in 2003 with the shorts Carter's Wish (everybody's wishes start coming true, literally) and La Cerca (the 17-year old Niño discovers "a world beyond the barbed-wire fence" of his grandfather's ranch).

Next came some guest spots on tv series -- In Justice, The Cleaner, The Shield, NCIS -- where he apparently played Hispanic teens in graffiti-strewn neighborhoods.

After Chris, Hector starred in five episodes of Brothers (2009) -- not to be confused with the psychological thriller Brothers (2009), or Brothers and Sisters (2006-2011), which has a gay sibling.  This one had Michael Strahan and Daryl Mitchell as estranged brothers running a restaurant.  Hector plays a cook. 

Coincidentally, Tichina Arnold, the Mom on Everybody Hates Chris, plays Cynthia.  

Then came some guest spots on Till Death, Bad Therapy, Booze Lightyear, and Good Samaritans.  

And The Undershepherd (2012): Two best friend ministers rise in the ranks of the Baptist Church, but one is being led by God, and the other by Satan.  

Hector plays TD, presumably a church member.  The Baptist Church doesn't look kindly on um...er...androgynous men, so appearing in this movie suggests that our boy is straight.

In 2016, Hector became the producer/ writer/ star of The Office Chronicles, a short about "true feelings revealed" at the office: Jerry (Hector) is in love with Becky, but she's in love with Sean (Marlon Begue), who absolutely cannot act, and admits an infidelity, whereupon she dumps him.  Sounds heteronormative. Dude is definitely a straight Baptist.

.

Wait -- in 2021, Hector starred in the podcast No Such Thing, not to be confused with the supernatural thriller No Such Thing (2021).  Hector plays Jesus, a gay guy who is working in a bookstore and dating Don (Jimmy Clabots, butt left).  He comes out to Mom and Dad in the last episode.

I'm confused.  Are you um...er...androgynous or not, buddy boy?

More after the break

Jason Maybaum: Is the gay-vague son on "Raven's Home" gay in real life? With some Disney Descendants and Jake Green's goods

 

In 2021, I reviewed an episode of Raven's Home (2017-2023), the Disney channel update of That's So Raven, in which the girl with psychic powers grows up and moves in with her frenemy Chelsea, and they raise their kids together.  I didn't realize at the time that Raven Simone, an out lesbian in a same-sex marriage, refused to make Raven gay!  Disney offered, she refused!  Friggin' Uncle Tom, complicit in the heteronormative erasure of LGBT people -- including lesbians, darn it!

Chelsea's son Levi (Jason Maybaum, left, with costar Isaac Ryan Brown) is a femme boy, an aspiring actor, cast as the gay-subtext Mercutio in Romeo and Juliet.  Mom says "I'm proud of you, no matter what," which is usually what parents say to avoid saying "even if you're gay." And he never expresses any interest in girls in any episode -- I checked.  Due to Raven's insistence on heteronormative erasure, he couldn't be canonically gay, but -- and the writers -- certainly piled on the gay subtexts.  Could Jason be gay in real life?   

Jason was born on August 31, 2007, and began his acting career in commercials in 2014, when he was seven years old.

He played the son in The Perfect Stanleys (2015), about a stay-at-home mom whose life is "perfect."

A bratty kid who criticizes Ders' museum purchases in an episode of Workaholics (2016)

A commercial kid who terrorizes sports great Frank Cushman (Jerry O'Connell) in an episode of the mockumentary series The Fifth Quarter (2016).

Left: Jake Green, who plays the moderator of the mockumentary, if he's the right one.  If not, just realax and look at his abs.  

And now back to Jason:

The son in Bitch (2017), about a woman who snaps and thinks she's a dog (say what?).

The bratty son of Superstore manager Glen (2017).

A student in Teachers (2017), with Ryan Caltagirone (left) as Hot Dad.

The son in Desperate Waters (2019), with Matthew Lawrence taking a male-female couple on a "three hour tour" (not really; reference to Gilligan's Island).

The son in...well, you get the idea.  A lot of sons.  Let's try some of Jason's when he was a teenager, after Raven's Home.

 

Since Raven, Jason has mostly done voiceover work: Wolfboy and the Everything Factory (2021-22), Spidey and his Amazing Friends (2022-23), Ridley Jones (2023).

Plus a lot of singing and dancing.

His only recent live-action role seems to be Cameron in Descendants 3 (2021), which the IMDB says is about competitive dancers in Los Angeles, but Wikipedia says is an animated film featuring the children and grandchildren of Disney villains: Booboo Stewart (descended from Jafar), Mitchell Hope (left, Beauty and the Beast), Dylan Playfair (Gaston --wait, wasn't he gay?)....

More after the break

Shayne Topp: Nickelodeon teen, Barry's buddy, bodybuilder, sketch comedian who pretends to be gay and have a massive d*ck. We'll see.

 

The Goldbergs (2017-23) was a nostalgic look at showrunner Adam F. Goldberg's childhood experiences in the 1980s, with Sean Giambrone (here being murdered in the shower) as a stand-in for Adam.  I wasn't a fan: most of the experiences involved attempts to meet, impress, or win The Girl of His Dreams.  But it aired in the same block with Speechless and Modern Family, in the days before we went to all-streaming services, so we had no choice but to watch.  

I liked Adam's older brother Barry (Troy Gentile), a muscular wrestler, and in Season 2, the gay-vague hippie-chill Matt (Shayne Topp), who struggles become his friend and join the Jenkintown Posse.  As far as I remember, he never displayed any heterosexual interest, and he had a queer-coded attraction to Barry.

Plus he was exceptionally cute,  and at 5'7", he was a member of the Short Guy Brigade.  Who could ask for anything more of actor Shayne Topp?

How about a muscular physique?

And other parts of interest.

Into tie-up games.

And a reader.

Born in 1991 in Florida, Shayne played the unrequited crush of a Yu'pik girl in Dear Lemon Lima (2009).  He was a regular in the teen variety show So Random (2011-12), and appeared in episodes of ICarly, Henry Danger, Sam & Cat, and Fred: The Show.  He also did some fashion and n*de modeling. But he is best known as a sketch comedian.

More after the break. Caution: Explicit.

"Thundermans Undercover": Gay-vague superhero Jack Griffo flexes, tries to pick up men. With a lot of beefcake and Griffo junk

 

Nickelodeon's Thundermans (2013-18) featured a nuclear family with superpowers trying to live incognito in the normal-powered world. Teenage Phoebe has chosen superhero as her career goal, while her twin brother Max  (Jack Griffo) wants to become a supervillain.  He trains under Doctor Colossus, a supervillain transformed into a rabbit, and later the sensei of evil, Dark Mayhem.  Eventually Max decides that being a supervillain would be too destructive for his family, so he switches career paths and teams up with Phoebe.  They become the Thunder Twins.

Max was heavily gay-coded, with minimal interest in girls.  When he does ask a girl out, it is often because he wants to use her to acquire something of value, or to continue to hide his secret identity.  Or he'll date a girl once and find an excuse to drop her.  I did that quite often in high school, too.  Anything to get out of that darn good-night kiss.

The spin-off Thundemans Undercover (2025) has the grown-up and bulked-up Thunder Twins going undercoer in Secret Shores, Florida, to investigate a new supervillain threat.  Superheroes work pro bono, so to pay the rent, Phoebe gets a job as an art teacher at Secret Shores High School, and Max becomes the assistant principal.  Don't you need years of teaching experience to qualify to be principal? They are also living together and parenting their little sister Chloe, who happens to be a student. 

The familial relationship between Max and Phoebe, and the fact that the Chloe is the real focus character, eliminates the need for hetero-romance. Phoebe dates once in the first season, but Max continues to be gay-vague.  

I'm reviewing Episode 1.9, "No Friend in Sight."

Scene 1: After a long day of school and superhero training, teenage Chloe is trying to have "Me-Time with No Max."  She settles down with a giant bowl of popcorn (essential for watching tv on tv, but never in real life) and turns on Glove Island.  Whoops, Max appears, and wants to hang out.  

Nope, Chloe zaps herself into the kitchen to watch alone.  Now Phoebe appears and wants to hang out!

She tries zapping into the superhero lair, but both Max and Chloe follow.

Frustrated, she announces "I'm going to Splats."  But they grab her hands as she zaps -- she's stuck with them. 

Scene 2: Splats, the standard teencom hangout.  Chloe criticized her guardians for wanting to spend every moment with her. They should make some friends of their own.  

It can't be hard to make friends, right?  Phoebe rushes up to a girl and exclaims "My future maid-of-honor!  We both wear pants!", scaring her away.

Scene 3: Apprised of how not to come on too strong, Max heads to the gym. Personal trainer Jim asks if he wants to sign up for a chance to win tickets to a party hosted by A-List Elixers, where they will introduce their $100 milkshake.  Max pushes: "My new best friend!"  Turned off, he walks away.

Jim is played by gay actor/model Austin Trapp, who you have seen in Yellowjackets, Tracker, and So Help Me Todd.

Max tries to attract the next guy by flexing. It's a gym, babe -- everybody is  muscular.  Try winning him over with your wit and charm...oh, right.  Better flex.

Buffed Dude agrees to spot him, but when Max requests "a lifetime of friendship," he gets spooked and rushes away.

More after the break.

Hank Greenspan: Femme boy plays only straight characters, but is he gay in real life? With bonus Brandon butt and Carlos cock

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