"Getaway": Nick Frost and his gay son vs. a creepy Swedish ritual and a transphobic stereotype. With Kit Conner and a stunt d*ck

Getaway or Get away, either "a holiday" or "someone is chasing you!" is a 2024 vanity project, written by, directed by, and starring Nick Frost, who has played the sidekick in several Simon Pegg movies.  But it also stars Sebastian Croft of Heartstopper: he plays the closeted boyfriend that Charlie (Joe Locke) has before he starts dating Nick (Kit Connor, below).  

Sebastian is "not into labels," but he supports queer causes: his line of Queer Past clothing supports LGBT refugees.  So maybe his character will be gay.

Scene 1:  Dad Richard (Nick), Mom Susan, teenage son Sam (Sebastian), and teenage daughter Jessie are heading on a holiday (vacation) through Sweden, with Finland as a stand-in.  Their destination is the island of Svalta, where in 1824 the islanders quarantined themselves for fear of a deadly flu pandemic. Two and a half years later, when British soldiers checked, most of the islanders had died of starvation, or turned to cannibalism. The soldiers were murdered.  Why are the British checking on an island in Sweden? 

They mention that it's near Kristianstad in northern Sweden.

Every ten years the islanders commemorate the event with an eight-hour long play, Karantan.  Really? Not every year?  Jews have yahrzeits to remember their dead loved one every year.  

Scene 2: Two Days Until Karantan.  They arrive at a horrible cafe at the port.  The surly owner snarls and mocks their weird menu requests, like cheese on a hamburger  (well, the Ugly Americans didn't even try to speak Swedish.  Wait, they're Brits).

Like every horror movie ever, he warns them not to go to the island. There are no hotels -- "no worries, we have a B&B" -- and the islanders hate outsiders, especially during Karantan.  

Then why is there a ferry several times a day?  And why do they have a tourism brochure?  Oh, wait, I know why.  I've seen "Midsommer" and "The Ritual"

Son and Daughter find a decapitated bird, but that's not a sign or anything.  Off they go. Whoops, Dad left his wallet on the bar.

Scene 3: The ferry lady has never heard of outsiders going to Svalta before, and warns that they'll be stuck for three days.  Dad goes to fetch his wallet.  Why did they bother with the "leaving it" bit?

Left: Nick's dick, actually a stunt cock. Not from this movie.

Cut to the ferry, with islanders glaring like they want to attack.   When they dock, a crowd of islanders is staring at them and growling.  Finally Commune Leader Klara asks what they are doing there.

"We've come to see your play."

"Billy Elliot is a play.  Grease: the Musical is a play.  Karantan is our life."  The isolated islanders get around.

She orders them to go back to the mainland: "You are not welcome here."  I'd be outta there, but Mom insists on staying. Otherwise be lousy story.

Mom tells them that one of her ancestors died here: he was one of the British soldiers murdered by the islanders during the quarantine.  So that's why they are so adamant about staying?  She wants revenge or something?

Scary lady licks her face to force her to leave, but at that moment Matts (Eero Milanoff) appears and tells the islanders that it's ok, he rented them his mother's house. They growl, but what can you do?  

Scene 4: At the house, Matts tells a long story about his mother walking across the ice to get married in 1974, and dying 10 years ago at the age of 91, beheaded in her favorite chair. So she was 50 when she married?

Then he creepily sneaks up on Teenage Daughter.  I can't tell if she likes him or not. 

Scene 5: While Mom and Dad cook dinner, and Teenage Son complains about the lack of cell phone service, Teenage Daughter takes a bath (five minute long closeup of her boobs).  She hears a shuffling noise, and investigates, but finds nothing.

More after the break

Josh Fadem: From Tulsa to "Twin Peaks," with Groundlings, coffee, zombies, a glory hole, and his dick

 

We've been watching the 2017 sequel to Twin Peaks, the 1990s cult series about paranormal events in a quirky small town.  

The darn thing makes no f*king sense.  

The main plot, as far as I can figure out, involves the spirit of FBI Agent Dale Cooper (Kyle MacLaughlin), trapped in the Red Room 25 years ago with ghosts and demons who talk backwards and make cryptic statements.  Meanwhile, his body, named Dougie, took a job at an insurance agency in Las Vegas, had a wife and son, did something that got him targeted by the mob, and consorted with prostitutes.

After 25 years, Dale's spirit returns to Dougie's body, but can't perform everyday tasks, speak more than parroted words, or understand anything -- yet no one notices!  

In Episode 1.5, his wife dresses him in a ridiculous lime-green suit and drops him off at his office, where of course he just stands there until gopher Philip Bisby (Josh Fadem) notices, gives him a cup of coffee, and escorts him to his staff meeting, where he just stands there.  

Coffee guy Philip appears again in Episodes 1.6 and 1.7, luring Dougie with coffee and escorting him to the boss's office.  I found something homoerotic in the exchange: Philip sort of likes Dougie. 

He is cute -- and short, 5'9" to Kyle's 6'0" -- so I started looking for the other work of actor Josh Fadem, and maybe some n*de photos.

I thought he was a recent college graduate, new to Hollywood, on his first acting gig, it turns out that Josh Fadem was in his mid-30s in 2017.  He now has 159 acting credits, 40 writing credits, a wikipedia article, and a number of n*de photos.

He was born in Tulsa, Oklahoma in 1980, and  graduated from Booker T. Washington High School.  Imagine being Jewish in Bible Belt, Oral Roberts University Tulsa. 

He moved to Los Angeles in 2000, trained with the Uptight Citizens Brigade and the Groundlings, and appeared in countless comedy shows, including It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, The Whitest Kids U Know, UCB Comedy Originals, The Bank Room, The Midnight Show, Key and Peele, Superstore, Minx, and American Dad.

And a lot of heterosexist shorts, like The Do It Up Date and I Think She Likes You.

On the other hand, The Gory Hole sounds provocative.

He is best known as Simon Barrons, assistant to Tina Fey's Liz Lemons on three episodes of 30 Rock (2009-2012).

And as Marshall Dixon, also called Joey, a University of New Mexico film student/teacher hired by unethical lawyer Saul in 14 episodes of Better Call Saul (2015-22).  Marshall doesn't seem to get any plot arcs of his own, but according to the Google AI, he has a gay subtext.

More after the break. Caution: explicit.

"Unstable: Rob Lowe and son are grieving, the Pilgrim Twins have small dongs, and there's a gay sycophant

 

 I haven't watched many of Rob Lowe's recent tv shows or movies; I had the impression that he wasn't entirely gay-friendly.  But he stars with his son, John Owen Lowe (below),in the 8-episode Netflix sitcom, Unstable.  I reviewed Episode 4, "Pilgrims and Sex Parties," since sex parties are a gay community thing.  

Premise: "Unstable genius" Ellis (Rob), who owns a biotech company, spirals out of control after the death of his wife (red flag!), so he brings his son Jackson (Johnny) aboard to smooth things out.  Except Jackson is a flautist.  How would that even work?

Scene 1: The biotech company.  A lady in a business suit complains that a photo of Ellis with a hawk on his head has gone viral, creating a meme where he's called the Wizard of Odd.  Ellis doesn't care: he's busy channeling his inner child and monkeys. 

Left: Lowe butt

Meanwhile, the obsessive Smithers to Ellis' Mr. Burns, Malcolm (Aaron Branch), has a meet-cute with the new HR Guy, but is too flustered about HR regulations to flirt.  A gay character in the first scene!  I stand corrected.

Scene 2: Ana, Ellis's main ally on the board of directors, asks how he's handling the grief over his Dead Wife.  Not well , he says: after losing the most wonderful person in the world, life is meaningless. After four episodes?  Usually Dead Wives are mentioned once to establish that the guy is heterosexual, then dropped.  Is this a show about grief?  

"So," Ana says, changing the subject, "About the hawk-on-your-head story, that reporter screwed you in the ass with a King Kong dick?"   Sounds like a fun date, but I think it's just a homophobic reference to the hawk-on-the-head story.

Scene 3:  Ana the Board Member runs into Ellis's son Jackson, the flautist-biotech scientist, and asks how he's handling the grief over his Dead Mother.  Not well;, he says; the grief comes in waves.   She notes that she's still playing the harp, so why doesn't he stop by with his flute for some "pluck and toots."   That sounds dirty.

Scene 4:  In the lab, scientists Luna and Ruby are looking through microscopes, trying to shame some cells into dividing.  They discuss Luna's never-seen "loser" boyfriend Brian and Ruby's ex-boyfriend - Jackson!  A heterosexual flautist?  How odd!

Sycophant Malcolm comes in all flustered over his meet-cute, so the scientists offer to create a litmus test to determine if HR Guy is actually interested. 

Ellis enters the lab, announcing that he's ready to go back to work: "If we can get some reductive oxidant on the anode..."   Uh-oh, he peers into a microscope and starts crying.  Too soon.  Strange -- usually working helps you deal with the grief.  Maybe the Dead Wife was a scientist.  

Scene 5:  Business-Suit Lady approaches the mansion of JT and Chas (JT Parr, Tom Allen, left), who are trying to destroy Ellis.  Boyfriends? No, brothers: they mention their father.  She orders them to back off, or she will post an embarrassing video. 

 "The sex parties?  We don't care -- everybody in tech goes to sex parties."  

No, actually she has a film of the two pretending to be Pilgrims.  If it gets out, no girls will come to their sex parties, so they'll have to have sex with guys.  "Ugh!  Gross!  Ok, we'll back off."  So these are heterosexual sex parties?  I've never heard of such a thing.

More grief after the break

Gemstones Episode 4.6: Kelvin cruises Anakin Skywalker, Jesse hangs dong, and Cobb gets his cobb bit off. With a nude Ricky and Smiley Creature

 

Previous: Gemstone Episode 4.5, Continued: Kelvin crashes, the Monkey fumes, and we find out who is bigger, adult video star Joey Stefano or Adam Devine

Title: "Interlude IV."  The Interlude is usually Episode 5, but this season started with a stand-alone, so it's Episode 6.  We're halfway through the action in the present day, with Kelvin's meltdown, Judy's jealousy over the monkey, and Eli and Lori dealing with violence.

The New Parking Lot: 2002.  Eli is standing before the County Zoning Board, discussing his plan to build a 10-acre parking lot at the Salvation Center, which would involve buying and demolishing neighboring houses.   He claims that it will  bring thousands of people to town, who will spend money, so it's a "win-win" situation.  Aimee-Leigh points out that they're also bringing in jobs.  The townsfolk growl and complain.  So am I.  Zoning restrictions?  How boring can you get? 

Cute council member Terry Cook is eating a donut.  A unnnamed background player, he notes that they did several takes.  Sometimes he had to be angry. Once he ate an egg.  

He sort of looks like Jamie McGuire, the Smiley-Face Creature from From

 The council president yells: "You may be able to buy out desperate people, Dr. Gemstone, but that doesn't make it right!"   She notes that the county board usually rubber-stamps their crazy plans, but not this time: "The crowd of people behind you is voiceless, and someone has to be their voice!"  

The plan is rejected, and the couple leaves in defeat. Aimee-Leigh wonders why they're even doing this ministry stuff.

Eli: "For the lake house."  That is, for the money. Um...serving God?  Spreading the Gospel? Helping people?

They walk out into a huge demonstration.  Someone shoves pies in their faces.

Writers: This sequence has no connection to the plot.  In Season 3, the Y2K scandal caused Peter's meltdown and enmity toward the Gemstones, but Cobb's enmity has nothing to do with the new parking lot.

Corey Defends Daddy: At the lake house, Lori's husband Cobb (Michael Rooker) is trying to water-ski, but Eli drives too fast, and he capsizes. His manhood challenged, he splutters and swears. 

Meanwhile, on a raft-slide, Young Judy and Jesse laugh at Cobb, which upsets his son, Young Corey.

Young Kelvin defends him, pointing out that at least Cobb is trying, whereas Jesse spends all his time "being bad, having sex."  This has resulted in Amber getting pregnant.  The enraged Jesse tries to attack, but Corey stops him.

A New Album: While Lori and Aimee-Leigh watch their husband in the water, posturing to see who will become the Silverback, they advise the very pregnant Amber that she should go inside and take a nap.  She refuses, so they discuss how much they dislike their kids until Amber gets tired of it and leaves.

Then they discuss recording a new album; they haven't recorded together in years, so it will be nostalgic.

Cut to the studio, where they are making up song lyrics while Judy listens.  Kelvin eavesdrops from outside the door.  Notice that his t-shirt says The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron, Boy Genius,  reflecting his belief that he is a "boy genius."  The tv show premiered on July 20, 2002, so this must be a few months later, maybe in September 2002.

More after the break