I wasn't planning to review Survival of the Thickest, about a thick black woman finding body positivity as a fashion designer. But Queerty said that it had gay representation, and one of the cast members, somebody with the last name Lopez (I didn't record the first name), appeared on the nude celebrity subreddit, so I figured I'd give it a shot.
In Episode 3.4, "C'est la vie, Bitch," they visit Paris Fashion Week, while back in New York, Khalil and Luca "connect." They must be the gay couple, and there'll be shots of Paris.
Khalil is played by Tone Bell, butt left.
Scene 1: Mavis and her friend on a tour bus, shouting "I'm a designer!" They reach their destination, the Victoria Palace Hotel , but they're actually staying at the horrible hostel next door.
"It's got character," Mavis says, trying to look on the bright side. "It's got queef." I think the word means a lady part fart. It was used to insult Keefe on The Righteous Gemstones.
"It smells like an 18th century pap smear." A lot of lady part jokes.
She likes the doorknobs in the center, like a belly button, and asks the concierge if she can check his belly button. He refuses.Scene 2: Seven flights of stairs and a hallway bathroom, but there's a view of the Eiffel Tower from the window. Of course -- on tv every Parisian hotel room looks out at the Eiffel Tower, even if it's miles away and facing the wrong direction. Mavis washes her breasts with a handi-wipe, while they discuss how far they've come in two years.
Whomp, someone farts. Turns out that the ladies have a roommate sleeping under the covers in the top bunk.
Scene 3: Luca (Marouane Zotti), the one who's going to connect with Khalil (hopefully by kissing), is counseling a refugee couple, assuring them that they'll get housing soon. They also need a job. "I promise that you'll..."
His coworker Donny Wang (Ronnie Chien) butts in to tell them that their chances are slim, When they leave, he advises "Never promise anything. Keep their expectations vague...."
In other news, a girl asked him to DJ at the strip club tonight.
"Sorry. I have plans with friends," Luca tells him.
"Oh, I wasn't inviting you. I was bragging about all the naked ladies I'm going to see." Ugh, a character whose shtick is being hetero-horny.
Scene 4: Mavis is giving a pep talk to her models, telling them to "eye fuck" everyone. There are some androgynous and genderfuck types, and some plus-sized, like David Ventakapen (left). They walk across a portico (with the Eiffel Tower in the background, of course) and get photographed. Then Mavis is introduced to thunderous applause. A journalist tells her that the genderfuck outfit has made her the Best New Renegade of Fashion Week, which will get her a Vogue cover. And she's invited to the Vogue party tonight. Wait -- she's the most renowned fashion designer in the world, but she's staying in a youth hostel?
Suddenly Mavis almost collapses in pain, but her friend tells her to dance it off. Chekhov's Gun: This better be important.
Scene 5: They have time to kill before the Vogue party tonight, so we get a montage of the usual. They want to take a boat tour, but the tour guide won' sell them tickets, even though the boat is only half full. And when they try to go to a restaurant, the waiter (Theo Pham) tellsl them that it's closed. Racism plotline? About 10% of the French population has African ancestry, more in big cities.
They try a Senegalese restaurant in the Black neighborhood, Château Rouge in the 18th Arrondissement, and are served immediately. "I like Black Paris a little better than the rest of Paris," the Friend muses.
Khalil and Luca getting close after the break
Scene 6: In Harlem, Khalil is playing basketball with his bros, when Luca the Refugee Settlement Counselor arrives with a soccer ball. They look suspicious, but Khalil reassures them: "He Mavis' dude, he cool."
Clive (center) shocks everyone by speaking Italian.
"Wait -- were you Italian before today?" Khalil asks.
"I've never played basketball before," Luca tells them. "But I'm sure I'll pick it up."
They play 3-2, figuring that they'll trounce the stupid "soccer player," but he turns out to be good at the game, making basket after basket. Turns out that he deceived them: "I've never played basketball before -- in the U.S."
I don't see anybody falling in love.
Scene 7: In Paris, Mavis and her Friend are on their phones, watching the models of her enemy walking. She loves his clothes, and fumes: "How can I hate someone so much, and love something so much?" Then she realizes that the guy stole her catchphrase!
"He'll be at the Vogue party," the Friend says. "We're gonna fondue his ass."
After another Eiffel Tower shot, we cut to the party: Uh-oh, the concierge (Harry Trueheart) tells them that they're not on the guest list. But the journalist invited them. Her Arch-Enemy (Ronreaco Lee, bottom photo) twirls his moustache and rants "You're not getting into this party, or any party, ever. Plus my evil scheme worked: you're not the New Renegade of Fashion Week, I am. I get the Vogue cover, mwah-ha-ha." So tell us how you arranged it. Did you bribe the journalist?
Cut to Mavis and Friend walking along the Seine in the rain, being depressed. Mavis also notes that her titties hurt...and she's late for her period...uh-oh, she pregnant!
Maybe the Lopez guy (cock left) is her boyfriend, so we'll see him when she calls with the news.
Scene 8: Mavis in the bathroom of the youth hostel, calling Lopez: "Hey, Babe, I know it's late, but..."
Nope, she got his voice mail.
"Now I got something to fight for," Mavis muses.
Cut to her invading her Arch-Enemy's hotel room. She is trying to make the world a more inclusive place, but he isn't, so she is dissolving the partnership immediately! I don't get it: he stole your stuff and got you kicked out of the party, and you were partners? That's what a rival would do.
Suddenly he gets a text. "Oh, Mavis called from Paris. I got to call her back."
She gives him the news -- it's nighttime in both New York and Paris, for some reason -- and they celebrate. The end.
Beefcake: None.
Paris: Some nice street scenes. But we never see any of Paris Fashion Week.
Gay Characters: Big reveal: Khalil is straight! He has three girlfriends through the course of the series.
The only Lopez in the cast list is Anthony Michael Lopez, who plays the assistant of supermodel Natasha in ten episodes. He doesn't express any romantic interest in anyone, but being the assistant of a supermodel is queer-coded.
According to Google AI, one of Mavis' friends, Marley, was bisexual, and started dating a woman before she was written out of the show. Let me guess: she comes out as bi in her last episode?
And the trans drag queen Peppermint plays herself in 15 episodes, just not this one.
So trans and bi women, but gay men don't exist, or are relegated to subtext. Got it.
My Grade: I can't call it a tease, since regular viewers would know that "getting closer" just means two straight guys becoming friends. But I still don't like it. And the absence of gay men. And the fact that you can see the Eiffel Tower from every window in Paris. C
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