"Everyone is Doing Great": Four actors face life after fame, with gay hints, kombucha, "Heated Rivalry," "Euphoria," and dicks


Back in 2021, a dark comedy called Everyone is Doing Great dropped on Hulu, featuring a gay guy who moves home because his dad is dying of a brain tumor, and needs someone to take care of his teenage daughters.  I turned it off after ten minutes -- not a fan of shows about dying people.  Five years later, a new season has dropped on Netflix.  The dying dad plotline must be long gone by now, and I'm running low on tv shows with gay characters to review, so here we go, Season 2, Episode 1.

Scene 1: Dude is moving his stuff from a U-Haul to a storage unit.   He posts a selfie to someone who praises him as "sweaty boy," then drinks in the empty truck bed.   Are you planning to live there?

Meanwhile, another dude is picking up trash by the road, probably as part of a community service program.  He must be on probation. He finds a t-shirt with a frog on it, and decides to keep it. 

Meanwhile, two actors playing cops are standing in front of a green screen, ready for a scene where they run from an explosion.   They run, jump onto a mat, and...the director doesn't like it.  Do it again, for the fifteenth time, but this time hold hands so we can see your chemistry, and run like Tom Cruise. They protest, but what the director says, goes.  Another take.


Nope, do it again.

Someone calls out "Michael."  I didn't know if they meant the actor or the director, until I checked the cast list.  It's actor Michael, played by Sean Carrigan.

The lady cop protests: "Grr.  That's enough takes.  There are 45 more scenes in this episode.  I'm going to lunch!"

"What's her problem?" the director asks.  Actor Michael goes to talk to her. 


The director is not named, but the only men not otherwise accounted for in the cast list are Bryan Greenberg (Miles) and Connor Dante (Carlos).   Neither of them look much like our director, but I'm going to go with Bryan Greenberg because he has some butt shots.


Scene 2:
U-Haul Guy is finally named: Seth (Stephen Colletti, top photo and left, at least according to LPSG).  After he finishes brushing his teeth from a grooming kit, he sneakily puts his toothbrush into the holder, next to the other one.  I got it -- he's staying with his boyfriend, and hinting that he wants to move in permanently.

Wait -- he's living with a girl?  Must be a gay man-straight woman friendship.

She announces that he can only stay for two weeks.  "Or maybe a month? I'm having trouble finding an apartment."   

"Ok, but stay out of my closet!"  You been trying on your bff's clothes, buddy?

"Sorry, I just like your sweater."

"It was my Dad's, who just died tragically, and we're all in mourning, remember?"  Wait -- didn't U-Haul Guy's Dad die tragically in the first season?  They're getting redundant.

"Ok, so I'll take it off."  Is he trying to entice her with his bare chest?

In other news, U-Haul Guy is excited about his Big Day coming up: a guest star role that could turn into a recurring!  Every actor's dream!


Scene 3:
In a room full of 12-step pamphlets, positive affirmations, and a humidifier, Probation Guy is calling to tell someone that Tyler loves them and is sorry that he cheated.  "Just remember, Love is Eternal."

Back story: He's Jeremy (James Lafferty), who starred in the teen vampire-werewolf drama The Eternals (like the Twilight Saga).Now he's making money recording personal greetings for fans, for birthdays and so on.

Boyfriend Raul  (Elliott Bush) comes in.  He works as a tour guide.  The last busload made a mess that he had to clean up, and now he's got kitchen duty.  He collapses onto the bed.  So it's a halfway house.

Cut to Actor Michael asking the lady cop actor if she's ok.  "Don't let the director get to you.  He's a hack.  The nephew of a network executive." 

Back story: the lady cop actor is Andrea (Alexandra Park), who starred with Probation Guy on The Eternals.  I'll bet U-Haul Guy was in it, too.  Maybe the two were vampire/werewolf rivals for The Girl.

Scene 4: U-Haul Guy visits Probation Guy at his halfway house.   

"Oh, you're Seth!" Boyfriend Raul exclaims.  "Probation Guy says your name in his sleep!" 

"Still?"  So they were rivals on camera, boyfriends off.  Juicy!  

"Um...so, you're watching Euphoria?  I watched that last night with my girlfriend."  Heterosexual identity established at Minute 12.  But why bring that up at this moment?  Is he trying to tell Boyfriend Raul that there's nothing to worry about, he's not interested in Probation Guy anymore?

"So, Probation Guy, the court said you had to spend one month in the halfway house, but you've been here two months.  Why?"

"I like it here.  The rent is cheap, and I can make money doing celebrity greeting videos."  

U-Haul Guy brought gifts: beets, watermelon, and some kombucha.  "That's got alcohol. It's not allowed in the house." "No, that's a misconception.  It can't get you drunk." 

More after the break

My 24 favorite autobiographical stories: gay hints, sausage sightings, a wiener, a goblin, the Pentecostal Porn Star, and Kevin the Vampire


 I've posted dozens of more-or-less accurate autobiographical stories here and on Tales of West Hollywood, moving from my fundamentalist Nazarene childhood through high school, figuring it out, college, grad school at Indiana University, a horrible year in...ugh...Texas, and on to the heart of the Gay World.  Some of the stories are minimal -- I was trying to cover every gay hint, boyfriend, hookup, and sausage sighting  -- but some are well-written, insightful, humorous, and occasionally erotic.  Here are my 24 favorites.

Childhood


I Fall Asleep in a Sailor's ArmsOn the train on the way back from visiting South Carolina.  He warns me about making friends with "sissies."

The Face of Pure Evil.  The Old Lady Schoolteachers' grandson, who may not have looked like this, rescues me from the Maniac who stalks the hallways of Denkmann Elementary School.

The Answer to the Naked Man's Question. A psychedelic Alice in Wonderland on tv on a golden afternoon, and a naked man who asks a question that I still can't answer. 






Comic Books and Cocks at the Furniture Store. Cousin Buster pranks me by claiming that you can get comic books at the furniture store -- and the delivery guys take off their shirts.  And sometimes their pants.

Grandpa Prater's Banjo  On the day after Christmas, Cousin Buster and I sneak into Grandpa Prater's room to borrow his banjo.

My Wild Night: Pancakes, Massage, and a Wiener.  I broke like six of my parents' rules that night, and was grounded for two weeks.  But at least I got to feel a...







High School

On My Knees in a Cute Guy's Bedroom.  When we went on vacation, we had to go to a local church, where they mistook us for sinners and tried inept soul-winning lines.  But once it worked to my advantage: A cute boy invited me to his bedroom "to pray."

The Preacher Pops a Boner.  Our Bible College invited prospective students to a weekend of campus tours, ball games, nature hikes, classroom visits -- and the boys' dorm lounge, where the only couch invisible to the monitor got quite busy.






Augustana College

The First Gay Rights March in Iowa. Passersby pull their friends out of stores to gawk.  The police watch closely, eager to arrest us if we happen to touch another marcher's hand

I Cheat on My Boyfriend with a Goblin.  The Goblin's name is Dale Schafer-Shit.  But Fred was cheating with him first.  Every friggin' day.

Sharing a Bed with Mary's Brother.  My friend Mary invites me to her horrible house in the suburbs for spring break.  But at least I get to share a bed with a cute bo.

More after the break

"Big Mistakes," Episode 1.1: Dan Levy as a gay Christian pastor with a secret boyfriend and a crazy sister. With Patrick and Pacheco nude.

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