The Top 12 Hunks of "School Spirits," living or not. A surprising number have posted dick pics.

 

School Spirits (2023-) stars Peyton List as Maddie Near, a high school student who suddenly finds herself wandering among the ghosts of other students (and one faculty member) who died at Split River High.  They have more lax rules than the ghosts of Ghosts: they can eat, change clothes, read books, and manipulate objects (although everything resets); but they cannot leave school property, and they cannot communicate with the living.  Except Maddie can.  Her ghost and living friends work together to solve the mystery of her disappearance.  Spoiler alert: She's not really dead.

There's some gay representation, and the beefcake quotient is very high.  Here are the top twelve hunks (with their dicks after the break):

1. Kristian Ventura as Simon, who had an unrequited crush on Maddie, and now can see and talk to her.  He's one of the main suspects in her disappearance.

2. Josh Zuckerman as Mr. Martin, a chemistry teacher who died in a lab explosion in 1968.  He runs an Afterlife Support Group, and gives the students assignments that supposedly will help them move on to the afterlife.  But he has a lot of secrets.

3. Nick Pugliese, top photo and left, as Charley, who died of a peanut allergy in the 1990s, just after a fight with his boyfriend (who is now a teacher at the school, so Maddie asks Simon to arrange an apology). 

4. Miles Elliot as Yuri, who died in the 1970s.  In order to avoid Mr. Martin's activities, he pretended to be cycling (only semi conscious, repeating the same action over and over); but in Season 2 he joins the gang, and starts dating Charley.

5. Zack Calderon (left) as Diego Herrera, the older brother of Maddie's living friend Nicole.

6. Milo Mannheim as Wally Clark, who died at a football game in the 1980s (the stadium is named after him).  He insists that the gang watch only sports movies, and continues to work out, leading one to conclude that ghosts have functioning cardiovascular systems.  In Season 2, Maddie and Wally start dating.

Dick pic after the break.  Caution: Explicit.

"Strip Law": Animated comedy about an inept lawyer, male strippers, and Las Vegas. With nude Adam Scott and Drew Tarver

 I have a bad feeling about Strip Law (2026), a new animated series on Netflix.  Its animated comedies tend to be dark and nihilistic, like Bojack Horseman, or mistake disgust for humor, like F is For Family.  But Strip stars Adam Scott, who has played gay characters a few times.  And gotten naked, although this is obviously not his real cock (not Jason Schwartzman's, either).

Janelle James, last seen on the gay-friendly Abbott Elementary; 

And Drew Tarver, who played gay characters in The Other Two and Running Point (and gotten naked; this is definitely his backside).

Plus the first episode promises a male stripper. 

Episode 1.1: "Finally, a Show about Lawyers."

Scene 1: Lincoln (Adam Scott) is in the courtroom, interrogating an Austin Powers impersonator.  His story is complex, involving an erotic buffet, performers dressed as Elmo, and something about bodily fluids too disgusting to record here.   The jury isn't paying attention anyway; they're all watching the Big Game. A female stripper comes in to announce closing arguments.  Lincoln wants to be a real lawyer, and doesn't approve of this circus atmosphere.

Scene 2: A tv commercial  A lawyer wants to move forward with the case but when he hears that their opponents are Nichols and Gumb, he tries to shoot himself. 

Nichols (Keith David) tells us that his partner Gumb has died, so he's going to fire her inept son, Lincoln.   His new slogan: "He fired Lincoln Gumb!"

Cut to Lincoln watching the commercial, upset because it's still playing after six months.  We meet his inept team:

Glem Blorchman (Stephen Root), dressed in a 1970s leisure suit, has been disbarred in most states due to his ongoing scandals. 

And Lincoln's niece Irene, a butch teenager doing bicep curls, who hasn't actually been to school in three years. 

They have no clients, they're out of money, so Lincoln plans to kill himself.  Glem can go live on the S.S. Pain Palace, where a "weird millionaire" makes men fight to the death.  Irene will fall in with a bad crowd and turn delinquent. Turn delinquent?  

Glem: "Hey, we have a client.  That big wet hunk of beef in your office."

Scene 3: Turns out that Mom Gumb took on the Hunk's case pro bono, and Lincoln has inherited it.  

Commercial: "Ladies, gay and bi dudes, come on down to the Brushfire Club, where we have the studliest hunks this side of the studinental divide!"  They do show men and women both cheering for the gyrating musclemen with bouncing bulges.

The problem: On "Freaky Friday," the strippers eat the customers' keys.

Lincoln: And that's popular?

Hunk: The customers love it!  But it's making us sick." 

So they're suing for medical bills. Problem: The club is being represented by the super-competent Steve Nichols (the one who fired Lincoln when his mom died).

Scene 4: Cut to Steve Nichols and the sleazy club owner eating spaghetti off a naked lady and discussing how they're going to win the case.  It's personal to Steve, because he hates Lincoln Gum and wants to destroy him. 

In his office, Lincoln complains that he'll never win the stripper case now.  He's disgraced his Mom's legacy. She jumps out of her photo to complain that because of his incompetence, she's in hell, where they have a disgusting process for going to the bathroom (I'm not describing it).

 He leaves to go get drunk, past Dennis the snake eater, the 666 Club, and Friendigan's.  Suddenly he comes across a street magician whose trick involves shooting a deck of cards: the bullet stops at the card you selected. 

Scene 5: Lincoln's assistants, Glem and Irene, visit client Bob Henderson, the used car king: "If you can find a better deal on a Toyota, you can kill me."  Seems that a guy found a better deal, and wanted to kill him, but the lawyers got him to settle for a maiming.  Now they want to be paid.  This is getting a little too cringe for my tastes. Why so many people inviting their own deaths?

Meanwhile, Lincoln talks to the Magician, Sheila Flambé , "magician and three-year all-county sex champion." Does he want to hire her or date her?

Turns out that she was Juror #5 on his last case.  Where he went wrong: "it was like a funeral for Saltine Crackers. This is Vegas!  You got to do it big!"

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