Skyler Paulley: A Bible-quoting gay-positive Regal HOV gets a boyfriend in a "Hocus Pocus" reboot. With Dean's dick and a GIsondo bj

 

Instagram recommended someone named Skyler Paulley, who has an alphabet soup of acronyms in his tagline: SPH, 2x AFKA, 5 Star Ambassador, Regal HOV, JV, Christian, CPR.

It doesn't include much more information, just a lot of shirtless, sports, and hugging-buddies shots.

His Dad, Ronnie Paulley Jr. (Proverbs 3:6: "In everything you do, put God first."), translates on his Facebook page:

SPH is a casting studio.

AFKA: American Freestyle Karate Association. Two wins.

5 Star Ambassador: for martial arts.

Regal HOV: Induction in the Martial Arts Hall of Fame.

Junior Varsity in soccer, basketball, football, baseball, wakeboarding, and track.  When does the dude find the time to act?

And he knows CPR.

Skyler is also a model.  Here he poses for Dillard's, and tells us: "I truly believe that God gives us these journeys, and we only succeed when we let Him lead the way."

The teen idol website doesn't add any information.  More shirtless and sports photos, sometimes with cute companions.  

He posts two photos with his girlfriend (not hugging or kissing).

In June 2026, Dad Ronnie takes Skyler and his buddy to The Mandalorian and Grogu.  But if Skyler has a girlfriend, wouldn't he take her?  

Maybe they broke up? 

So, quoting Bible verses and saying that "God gives us these journeys" usually means homophobic, and "girlfriend" usually means straight  .I 'd give him a miss except for his role in Hocus Pocus: The Mini-Series (2025). 

The Sanderson Sisters, three wacky witches from Hocus Pocus (1993), are zapped into the modern world, where they bedevil teenage Kevin (Skyler) and his family. Winifred, the character made famous by Bette Midler, is played by director Nathan Lampone in drag.

In Episodes 1 and 2, a zombie named Billy (Clayton Parks) comes to his rescue.  In Episode 3, he gets a makeover to become "more handsome" in Kevin's eyes, and they are living together, and dancing together at a school dance.  In later episodes, they fight the witches together.

The romance doesn't last -- by the second season, Kevin has a girlfriend, and Billy has moved on to a guy named Noah (Connor Roden), who reveals a "secret" in Episode 12.  

These may be texts rather than subtexts.  According to the official website, the production company, Studio Lampone, is queer-friendly, with several queer members.  They perform at Pride events and in gay bars. 

Wait -- how did Bible-quoting Skyler get involved with a queer-friendly  group?

He's got ten acting credits listed on the IMDB.  In 2023 he appeared in Kelly Clarkson's music video I Dare You (to Love), which features a gay couple getting married, another with their baby, and several rainbow hearts. Everything else is from 2025 or 2026.

Shorts:

I F*king Hate Oranges: Brothers Skyler and David Hernandez hate oranges. Written and directed by students at the University of North Carolina School of the Arts.

Left: David Hernandez.  Not the one who hates oranges.

Exterra: A young boy (Skyler) makes first contact with alien's (yes, they used an apostrophe as a plural). A local North Carolina production.

More after the break

"Everyone is Doing Great": Four actors face life after fame, with gay hints, kombucha, "Heated Rivalry," "Euphoria," and dicks

Back in 2021, a dark comedy called Everyone is Doing Great dropped on Hulu, featuring a gay guy who moves home because his dad is dying of a brain tumor, and needs someone to take care of his teenage daughters.  I turned it off after ten minutes -- not a fan of shows about dying people.  Five years later, a new season has dropped on Netflix.  The dying dad plotline must be long gone by now, and I'm running low on tv shows with gay characters to review, so here we go, Season 2, Episode 1.

Scene 1: Dude is moving his stuff from a U-Haul to a storage unit.   He posts a selfie to someone who praises him as "sweaty boy," then drinks in the empty truck bed.   Are you planning to live there?

Meanwhile, another dude is picking up trash by the road, probably as part of a community service program.  He must be on probation. He finds a t-shirt with a frog on it, and decides to keep it. 

Meanwhile, two actors playing cops are standing in front of a green screen, ready for a scene where they run from an explosion.   They run, jump onto a mat, and...the director doesn't like it.  Do it again, for the fifteenth time, but this time hold hands so we can see your chemistry, and run like Tom Cruise. They protest, but what the director says, goes.  Another take.

Nope, do it again.

Someone calls out "Michael."  I didn't know if they meant the actor or the director, until I checked the cast list.  It's actor Michael, played by Sean Carrigan.

The lady cop protests: "Grr.  That's enough takes.  There are 45 more scenes in this episode.  I'm going to lunch!"

"What's her problem?" the director asks.  Actor Michael goes to talk to her. 

The director is not named, but the only men not otherwise accounted for in the cast list are Bryan Greenberg (Miles) and Connor Dante (Carlos).   Neither of them look much like our director, but I'm going to go with Bryan Greenberg because he has some butt shots.

Scene 2: U-Haul Guy is finally named: Seth (Stephen Colletti, top photo and left, at least according to LPSG).  After he finishes brushing his teeth from a grooming kit, he sneakily puts his toothbrush into the holder, next to the other one.  I got it -- he's staying with his boyfriend, and hinting that he wants to move in permanently.

Wait -- he's living with a girl?  Must be a gay man-straight woman friendship.

She announces that he can only stay for two weeks.  "Or maybe a month? I'm having trouble finding an apartment."   

"Ok, but stay out of my closet!"  You been trying on your bff's clothes, buddy?

"Sorry, I just like your sweater."

"It was my Dad's, who just died tragically, and we're all in mourning, remember?"  Wait -- didn't U-Haul Guy's Dad die tragically in the first season?  They're getting redundant.

"Ok, so I'll take it off."  Is he trying to entice her with his bare chest?

In other news, U-Haul Guy is excited about his Big Day coming up: a guest star role that could turn into a recurring!  Every actor's dream!

Scene 3: In a room full of 12-step pamphlets, positive affirmations, and a humidifier, Probation Guy is calling to tell someone that Tyler loves them and is sorry that he cheated.  "Just remember, Love is Eternal."

Back story: He's Jeremy (James Lafferty), who starred in the teen vampire-werewolf drama The Eternals (like the Twilight Saga).Now he's making money recording personal greetings for fans, for birthdays and so on.

Boyfriend Raul  (Elliott Bush) comes in.  He works as a tour guide.  The last busload made a mess that he had to clean up, and now he's got kitchen duty.  He collapses onto the bed.  So it's a halfway house.

Cut to Actor Michael asking the lady cop actor if she's ok.  "Don't let the director get to you.  He's a hack.  The nephew of a network executive." 

Back story: the lady cop actor is Andrea (Alexandra Park), who starred with Probation Guy on The Eternals.  I'll bet U-Haul Guy was in it, too.  Maybe the two were vampire/werewolf rivals for The Girl.

Scene 4: U-Haul Guy visits Probation Guy at his halfway house.   

"Oh, you're Seth!" Boyfriend Raul exclaims.  "Probation Guy says your name in his sleep!" 

"Still?"  So they were rivals on camera, boyfriends off.  Juicy!  

"Um...so, you're watching Euphoria?  I watched that last night with my girlfriend."  Heterosexual identity established at Minute 12.  But why bring that up at this moment?  Is he trying to tell Boyfriend Raul that there's nothing to worry about, he's not interested in Probation Guy anymore?

"So, Probation Guy, the court said you had to spend one month in the halfway house, but you've been here two months.  Why?"

"I like it here.  The rent is cheap, and I can make money doing celebrity greeting videos."  

U-Haul Guy brought gifts: beets, watermelon, and some kombucha.  "That's got alcohol. It's not allowed in the house." "No, that's a misconception.  It can't get you drunk." 

More after the break

The Season: Rich straight guys have problems, too. Even in Hong Kong. With some dicks, bulges, yachts, and the dad from "Lost in Space"

I've been fooled by two tv series and a movie today.

Voice mails for Isabelle: A guy sits by Golden Gate Bridge, complaining to his dead sister he can't find his people in San Francisco. Where are all the drag queens. It took me 20 minutes to figure out that it's actually a girl, not a gay guy.  She was wearing a hoodie and pants to trick you into watching.  

Booth Bangla: A guy plans his sister's wedding.  He doesn't express any heterosexual interest -- until halfway through the movie, when he meets the Girl of His Dreams.

Oasis: A family checks into an exclusive resort.  Two boys immediately meet the Girls of Their Dreams, and an established couple smooch.  I was holding out for the teenage daughter to be a lesbian because she keeps cruising girls.  Nope,  she meets the Boy of Her Dreams at Minute 12.  

Heck with it.  I'm watching The Season on Hulu, about "the glittering world of super-yachts, sun, and scandal" in Hong Kong.  At least there will be some nice exterior shots.

Episode 1 Prologue.  A woman tells us: "Hong Kong is a city of bloodlines.  It will destroy you."   An elegantly dressed middle-aged woman floats in the water outside a burning yacht.  She sinks.

Scene 1: Six weeks earlier.  A young woman jogs through Hong Kong.  Nice exterior shots.  Someone named Carrie calls, and tells her that her job today is impress the Hexts.  Impress them, and you've got it made in Hong Kong.

A taxi takes her through the forest to her destination, a mansion or institution.   Carrie ends her cardio work out to greet her.  Back story: Her name is Cola (I love your parents' products, girl!), she has graduated with a degree in economics and maths, and her classmate Carrie, a wealth mover, has invited her to come out to Hong Kong as an intern.  "I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get a full-time job offer," Cola says.  Lie?  Steal?  Blow up yachts? 

The summer is Boating Season, where Hong Kong A-Listers decide who they will admit to their social network.  You have one chance to make a good impression; a single misstep, and you're out. 

Scene 2:  A lady, maybe Carrie, tells the staff that everything must be spotless, and asks Jon if he is ready for the maiden voyage.  "Bring on the Bacchanalia," he says in a bored/aesthete tone. He'll be telling the guests to "Diversity at your own risk."  He must be gay.

His teenage daughter sneers: "Great small talk, dad."  Nope. 

On the way upstairs to change, Jon asks a Male Staffer, "Is everything ready?"  Maybe they are having an affair. Wife, now calling him Christopher, says "I really need this to work."

Why the changed name?  It turns out that Bored Aesthete is Christopher (Toby Stephens, the Dad on Lost in Space).  Jon (Lee-Jai Yoon, top photo) is the Male Staffer.  Wife asked him a question while she was walking away from him, toward Christopher, who answered for him.

Scene 3: Cola and Carrie enter the yacht.  They're joined by a guy named Andrew Fung (Chris Pang of Crazy Rich Asians), who was in St. Tropez, but it's too hot in Europe. "Global warming is so inconvenient."

When Carrie introduces Cola, Andrew teases "A younger, hotter version of you?" Heterosexual identity established in his second sentence.  His "lovely wife" Niki arrives and is introduced.  Her family owns the Harbor Club, and are the bitter rivals of the Hexts, whom they are there to impress.  

Next Jay and Sara Byford, from Melbourne, arrive and kiss up to Andrew and his Lovely Wife, but he doesn't like them.  

He does like Hong Kong's most eligible bachelor, David Ho (Justin Chien, left). Maybe he's.....

Confused by the plethora of names?  Don't worry; all you really need to know is that everyone is very rich, very bored, and heterosexual.  

Back story: the family from Scene 2 are Christopher and Fiona Hext.  This is their yacht.  Wait -- everyone is here to impress them.  Why are they concerned about the day going well?  Spoiler alert: they're having financial problems.

Sceme 4: Cola is introduced to the Hext Family.  "How nice to see some new faces!" Fiona Hext exclaims.

Cola is turned on by a semi-shirtlessC hunk with his lady, but Carrie warns her: "God, no, that's Matthias! Just a personal trainer, not rich.  Ignore." Heterosexual identity established at Minute 11.

Left: Lincoln Younes plays Matthias the Personal Trainer, Gigolo, Drug Dealer, and Actor.

Dirt on the Hexts: "Christopher's family practically invented colonialism, and Fiona's Old Hong Kong money fueled it."  

Scene 5: Eligible Bachelor is helping the Captain pilot the ship.  Christopher Hext takes over and asks how things are going since the divorce.  It must be rough.  After all, he and Lian were together for 13 years. Don't get your hopes up -- Lian can be used for any gender, but 2/3rds of the time, it's a girl.  And gay marriage is not permitted in Hong Kong, so he would have to establish residence somewhere else if Lian was a guy.

"You're right, I'm miserable.  How are you doing?"

"Miserable, too."  

More after the break

The 18 biggest, hottest, or most surprising cocks of the musclemen and bodybuilders from Arnold to Slab, with bonus Brian

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