I have no interest in -- or knowledge of -- football, but when the new Hulu series
Chad Powers is advertised by two hunks gazing at each other, ready to fight or kiss, what choice do I have?
Wait -- the two hunks are both Glen Powell, who you recall from Scream Queens and Top Gun: Maverick. He's playing Russ Holliday, a famous college football player who was cancelled after an altercation with a kid in a wheelchair (and various other a-hole acts). He schemes to get back into the game by creating a new identity, Chad Powers, and playing for the struggling Catfish football team at South Georgia College (like, he's catfishing them, har har). Presumably he'll take classes, too.
Left: Glenn's butt.
In Episode 1.1, he steals a lot of supplies from his Oscar-winning makeup artist Dad to create the character, goes to the campus, and has a meet-cute with team mascot Danny (Frankie Rodriguez), a fashion-and-pop culture junkie who offers to help him with the deception. "Your new identity needs to be a modest, likeable guy. Just play the opposite of yourself." Danny is also a makeup artist. Dude is obviously gay.
I'm reviewing Episode 1.2, where Russ tries to maintain his new identity at a party at the coach's lake house -- shirtless hunks are promised.
Scene 1: Russ and Danny are behind the building, near the dumpsters. Russ roils at his prosthetic cheeks, but Danny insists: "You have to become Chad Powers. But don't talk much." Dylan (Jordan Mendoza) arrives with his new identification materials and transcripts, "but I couldn't find him a home address." No problem, he can stay with Danny. Tell me more.
Gross -- there's a bug burrowing into his prosthetic cheek!
Frankie Rodriguez is gay in real life, and has played gay characters in
High School Musical: the Series,
Modern Family, and
Will and Grace. I'm sure that Danny is gay, too, but they may not give us more than a few hints.
Scene 2: Football practice. Subplot involves the fussy Coach (Steve Zahn) and his assistant, secretly his daughter (doubtless also Russ's Love Interest).
Coach summons Russ/Chad to note a problem with his transcripts: he was homeschooled in West Virginia, in a wilderness surrounded by wolves (
nope, no wolves east of Minnesota). So how did he manage to play high school football?
"Oh, I played...um...with the wolves."
Um...ok. The Coach needs a winning season, or he'll be fired, so he's willing to suspend his disbelief.
Next Gerry (Colton Ryan), from the scout team and backup, introduces himself. So far, we have five named male characters. I'm getting a testosterone high. Who cares what a "scout team" and "backup" are?
80% of the photos Colton Ryan's Instagram show him hugging, kissing, and frolicking with a lady, and the other 20% show her alone, dressed as a man, showing her legs, smooching at the camera. I'm guessing that he's straight.
Wait, here's one where he's by himself.
Back to Chad Powers: Gerry teaches Russ/Chad his secret handshake, "a p*ssy symbol, because I get a lot of it." I know -- I've seen the first 300 pictures on your Instagram.
Gerry may want to be friends, but the other players ridicule Russ/Chad, especially Bully Nishan (Xavier Mills).
They start the practice. Russ/Chad screws up and is demoted to backup: "Hey, Flowers for Algernon, this is where you grab this clipboard." Literary reference, har har.
Football research: There are two quarterbacks on each team. The Starting Quarterback is chosen for his ability to draw photo-ops, fawning articles, and hefty donations from boosters. The Backup does the grunt work while the other players call him names. But if the Starting Quarterback is injured or traded to another team, won't the Backup take over, and the players who thought he was worthless will have to do what he says?
On the sidelines, Russ/Chad asks his Love Interest why Coach demoted him to Backup. "The Starting QB hasn't been decided yet," she assures him. "Coach wants you and Gerry to compete for the role."
More after the break. Caution: Explicit.
