Rev. Jesse Gemstone: The Big Man
Jimmy was prepared for a mansion rivaling Bruce Wayne’s – after all, the Gemstone motto was “Do It Big!” But he still wasn’t prepared for the Gemstone Lake House, on Lake Murray, South Carolina’s biggest reservoir. Tudor-style, with three round towers, four decks, eight bedrooms, two swimming pools, two boat launches, and a gazebo decorated with statues of the Greek gods Aphrodite and Apollo.
Jesse Gemstone himself met him at the door, casually dressed in a checkered shirt and white pants. He shook Jimmy's hand and said “Praise be to He,” as if it was a standard greeting. Jimmy had interviewed presidents and superheroes, but he was still in awe. Rev. Gemstone was not only one of the three heads of the most successful Evangelical organization in the world, he was constantly in the news for everything from a mismanaged Prayer Pod debacle to numerous attempts on his life.
“Thank you for agreeing to the interviews,” Jimmy said.
“It’s a visit,” he corrected. “You’re our guest for the weekend. Think of yourself as family – a long lost cousin. You want anything, just ask.” Then he flashed The Look – everybody did, Jimmy should have expected it, but he was still taken aback. This was Jesse Gemstone!
Since he was about 15 years old, everybody who saw Jimmy Olsen, except for kids and the very old, fell in love with him. Man, woman, gay, straight, single, married – it made no difference. Usually they weren’t really aware of what was happening, they just knew that they liked Jimmy and wanted to do things for him – he got a free dessert almost every time he ate in a restaurant, he was bumped to first class almost every time he flew, and he had never been turned down for a date or a hookup, except by Clark Kent – but sometimes they knew exactly what they wanted, and got a little aggressive. God, he hoped that Jesse Gemstone wouldn’t get aggressive.
But all Rev. Gemstone did was get semi-aroused, caress Jimmy's arm a bit, and lead him into the foyer and…the library, where the Gemstone siblings crawled after they were shot by Corey Milsap, and prayed for him as he died -- they prayed for their murderer!
“I’m surprised that you want to spend time at this place, when you and your brother and sister were shot and almost died here.”
He chuckled. “So, if I stayed away from every place where someone tried to kill me, I’d never go anywhere.” Then he hesitated. “This isn’t going to be one of those smear pieces, is it? Frankly, I agreed to the visit because I like some of your articles in the Daily Planet. You’ve got heart -- not like that Lois Lane and her muckraking interviews with Superman”
“It's going to be about the Gemstone Miracle, how you survive and thrive after adversity. I get you – I grew up in the South. In an Evangelical family.”
“But you’re not Evangelical anymore?” Uh-oh, Jimmy felt soul-winning coming on.
“I’m a gay ally – my sister is trans. And I just couldn't stand the homophobia in my home church."
“Believe me, that’s not a problem here.” Next they moved into parlor where they held talent contests, and Corey Milsap did a Michael Jackson routine – before trying to murder his friends. “Is there going to be a talent show this weekend?”
“Why, do you have a piece in mind?”
As Rev. Gemstone showed him the dining room, kitchen, sun room, and game room, Jimmy wrote his introduction in his head:
A cross between Elvis Presley and Conway Twitty, with the Van Buren sideburns and rings on every finger, Jesse Gemstone lives the Gemstone motto of “Do it big!” He has been kidnapped by his uncle, assaulted by a close friend, and shot by another close friend, yet he doesn’t hesitate to open his home and his heart to a complete stranger.
“My brother and sister and their spouses will be coming up for dinner, and my oldest, Gideon, will be arriving tomorrow. Right now it’s just my wife and I, our other two kids, and their boyfriends.”
Wait – boyfriends? Didn’t Jesse and Amber Gemstone have three sons? Jimmy would have to check his notes.
Mrs. Amber Gemstone: The Preacher’s Wife
Mrs. Gemstone was in the kitchen, elegantly dressed, all in white as she brought a pastry – peach cobbler? – from the oven. She wiped her hands on a towel to shake Jimmy’s hand.
“You must think I’m an old fashioned Evangelical housewife, subservient to her husband,” she said, pausing as she gave him The Look.
“No, I don’t think that at….”
She caressed his arm. “But we don’t have full time staff at the lake house. The service goes home after making lunch, so we have to either eat out or cook dinner ourselves. But coming all the way from Metropolis, I thought you’d appreciate some real Southern cooking rather than the Root Cellar or Thai Thai.”
Jimmy pulled away. “I’d appreciate that, Ma’am.”
“Open!” She popped a spoonful of cobbler into his mouth – a big spoonful, and still steaming hot! He cried out in pain.
“Oh, I’m so sorry! Jesse, get a glass of milk for our guest!”
Amber Gemstone, resplendent in white, the picture of the elegant Southern woman, is expertly hiding some insecurity. She longs to be a traditional Evangelical housewife, following St. Paul’s admonition to “be submissive to your husband,” but the three-time sharpshooting champion of Charleston doesn’t take kindly to being submissive.
Abraham: The Loud Son
“Pontius and Stacy are out on a pontoon boat,” Jesse told him. “You can meet them later. Next up is my youngest, Abraham. He just turned eighteen.”
Stacy? Ok, Jimmy must have misheard. Jesse’s middle son had a girlfriend, not a boyfriend.
He led Jimmy out to the bigger of the pools – the one behind the lake house – where two teenage boys were playing a noisy sword fight game with pool tubes. They were high school aged, athletic. When they saw Jesse and Jimmy, they jumped out of the pool and ran forward.
“Boys, this is Jimmy Olsen, the reporter who will be staying with us this weekend. My son Abraham –” he gestured at the shorter boy, who had a muscular physique and a shock of unruly brown hair. “And this is his friend Ash” – tall and thin, with brown skin and curly black hair.
“Don’t be so retro, Dad,” Abraham said, flashing the Look as he took Jimmy’s hand. “Ash is my boyfriend. I’m gay.”
“Yeah, with a boyfriend, I figured.” He dislodged himself from Abraham and shook hands with Ash, who of course flashed the Look.
"I'll leave you alone to get acquainted." Rev. Gemstone vanished into the house.
“Go ahead and publish it in The Daily Planet,” Abraham continued.
“If there’s room in my article.”
“I figured it out when I was like six, but I was afraid to come out to Dad after what happened to my brother Gideon…”
What happened to Gideon? Jimmy smelled a Gemstone story that he hadn’t read in a bio or seen on CNN.
More after the break. Caution: Explicit
“Hey, want to go water-skiing before dinner?” Abraham asked. “If you brought your swimsuit.”
“You don’t need a swimsuit,” Ash added, glancing down at Jimmy’s crotch with a semi. “The Gemstone Lake House is clothing optional.”
Living in the shadow of three generations of famous Gemstones, 18-year old Abraham has found his own way to be noticed: by being loud, by talking about what everyone else is afraid to mention: secrets, bodily functions, identities. The first thing he says to you, after “Hello,” is “I’m gay.”
Pontius: The Prodigal Son
Later, Jimmy met Rev. Gemstone’s middle son, Pontius, a goofily effervescent 21-year old, and his partner Stacy – a boyfriend, not a girlfriend, who turned out to be the only survivor of the Gator Farm Massacre. Jimmy had read about it, of course, but somehow he didn’t make the connection between Stacy the employee of serial killer Cobb Milsap and Stacy the long-haired femme boy who never stopped touching Pontius’ hand or hanging from his shoulder. The two were so engrossed in each other that they gave Jimmy only brief Looks and didn’t try to caress him; although Pontius may have been flirting when he said “Our room is right next door to yours, so if you need anything during the night – anything at all – just knock.”
Pontius Gemstone spent his life getting high, getting tattoos, and making sarcastic comments, pretending to hold nothing but contempt for his family, his religion, and his world. Until he found salvation in a long-haired femme boy with a tragic past.
Judy Gemstone: Her Mama’s Voice
When Rev. Gemstone’s brother and sister and their partners arrived, Jimmy barely had time to deflect their Looks before Amber called them to dinner. And then, instead of trying to interview them at the dinner table, he talked about growing up in an evangelical household.
“But we were much stricter than the Gemstones – no movies, no dancing, no alcohol, no eating out on Sunday. And when my sister came out as trans, all hell broke loose!”
“Is that why you gave up on God and ran away to Metropolis?” Judy asked, pretending that her judgmental zinger was just casual conversation.
“There are churches in Metropolis…” Jimmy began, but she interrupted him: “We almost lost Kelvin because he had the crazy idea that you couldn’t be gay and Christian at the same time.”
“It didn’t seem crazy to me,” Kelvin told her. “I had no idea that y’all were gay friendly. Especially after what happened to Gideon.”
What happened to Gideon? “By the way, will we be seeing him this weekend?”
“He’ll be up tomorrow,” Rev. Gemstone said, dismissing him. Was there bad blood between him and the heir to the Gemstone Empire?
After dinner and clean-up – Kelvin’s husband Keefe wouldn’t stand for leaving the dishes for the staff to clean up tomorrow -- the family gathered in the Game Room to watch a movie. Jimmy was disappointed – he expected something more elegant from one of the richest families in the world, and besides, there would be no conversations. He couldn’t get to know the Gemstones that way.
Jimmy chose a chair near the back of the room, but Judy Gemstone called him to the couch in the front row: “Plenty of room here!” She scooted over so he could squeeze between her and her husband BJ – tightly: their legs were pressed together, and BJ had to put his arm across Jimmy’s shoulders.
“Isn’t that better?” she asked, flashing the Look. “Right up in the action.”
BJ didn’t speak, but when Jimmy glanced down at his crotch, some stirring was obvious. Uh-oh, they were going to suggest a three way! It happened all the time, of course, but never when he would actually be spending the night with the couple.
As Rev. Gemstone scanned through the Netflix selections, getting votes from the family, BJ whispered “What are you going to do for the Talent Show tomorrow?”
“Um…I didn’t think…do you expect me to perform?”
Judy grabbed his knee. “I’m performing one of Mama’s hits, “Toodles Until Tomorrow." “It’s a sad song, so maybe you should do something upbeat, like “Sassy on Sunday.”
Wait – follow Judy with a song by Aimee-Leigh Gemstone, the most famous Gospel singer of the 20th century? With a song that had gone Platinum and was covered by everyone from Dolly Parton to Sting? No way!
“How about something easier, like "I Got You, Babe"?” BJ suggested. “I was going to do a magic act, but I’ll be happy to be your partner. We could practice in the Music Room later.”
“No, Beej, Tim Drake and Bernie did "I Got You, Babe" at the Christmas party, remember? "
Tim Drake – Batman’s partner, the Red Robin -- and his boyfriend? Jimmy was shocked – of course rich people would have famous friends, but he never expected a family of Southern Evangelicals to be buddies with a superhero from Gotham City.
"And Garth Brooks and I did "Misbehavin'" two years ago. Jimmy needs something fresh.”
Judy Gemstone inherited her mother’s voice and big personality, but not her fame. Constantly comparing herself to her more famous brothers, worried that she is not good enough, she overcompensates by coming on too strong as she tries to befriend everyone, especially celebrities of all sorts, from superstars to superheroes.
Lois Lane
When Jimmy was alone in his room, he grabbed his cell phone and called Lois Lane, the star reporter at the Daily Planet.
She was not happy to hear from him. “Jimmy, it’s 11:00 pm on a Friday night! Did you ever think that I might be busy?”
“Is Clark Kent with you?”
“No…well, he’s in the bathroom, but that’s not the point.”
“Listen, I have a lead on a big story….”
“Bigger than your gush piece on the Gemstone family?”
There was a knock on the door – Mrs. Gemstone, bringing him some more towels and flashing The Look. Ten to one if he asked her to stay, she would – after running to fetch Rev. Gemstone.
“Two of Jesse Gemstone’s three sons are gay, and probably the third, Gideon.”
“You call that a big story, you homophobe? Stop the presses, queer people exist!”
“That’s not what I mean. Something happened to Gideon that traumatized his uncle and brothers, but they won’t talk about it. And he refuses to spend the night in the Lake House. I suspect that Rev. Gemstone was…”
“Abusing him? That’s quite an accusation.”
“I never said abuse. But maybe there’s something else going on. Something unethical or illegal that Rev. Gemstone doesn’t want the press to know about.”
There was a knock on the door – Pontius: “Hey, Bro. Stacy and I stayed in this room last time, and I think I left a pack of condoms in here. Do you mind if I check?”
Jimmy shrugged.
“Thanks. I can’t use regular condoms -- I need extra-extra-extra large.” He glanced at Jimmy to see his reaction. Ten to one, if Jimmy asked, he’d drop his pants in an instant – or maybe he’d fetch Stacy first.
After a desultory check of the nightstand and bathroom cabinet, he said “Nope, not here. I’ll see if I can borrow some from Uncle Keefe. He uses extra-extra-extra large, too.”
When Jimmy went back to the line, Lois had hung up.
After awhile he could sense very noisy and effusive activity from the other rooms.
Pontius was topping Stacy -- hey, he wasn't using a condom
Abraham and Ash were doing 69
Kelvin was going down on Keefe
Judy was pegging BJ
Jesse and Amber fell asleep right away.
It was not a welcome superpower – Jimmy loathed staying in hotels, and visiting his parents at Christmastime was quite uncomfortable – but tonight it was downright depressing. He could have sex with anyone he wanted, at any time – he could knock on any door at the Lake House and be invited in -- but he had never had a boyfriend or girlfriend, not really.
Things heat up in Gideon Gemstone's Secret Life, Part 2: Keefe singing, Jimmy twerking, and Gideon in his underwear
See also: Pontius Gemstone and the Boy Named Stacy
"Superman" (2025): You'll believe a man can queerbait
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