Showing posts with label gay resort. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gay resort. Show all posts

Gemstones Future Memes: a gay resort, dog cousin's night, a nude wedding, a demon in the sack, and "Who dreamed it?"


This is a series of memes -- jokes -- featuring Kelvin and Keefe of The Righteous Gemstones and a few random hunks.  Most don't require you to have any background knowledge of the show.

1. Random nude dude


2.  The Nude Dude Review


Kelvin: Coming to this gay resort was a good idea.  Keefe's going to be sorry that he missed the Nude Dude Review.  I wonder where he went.

Keefe: Threw my back out in the sauna....I knew it didn't bend that way.  Must get to Kelvin...missing the Nude Dude Review...must see dicks.



3. In French class we called them "false friends"

At a conference in Montreal, Kelvin discovers too late that Le Spectacle des Trainées does not feature hot male interns.




4. Best dog friend of a cousin

Keefe: We have to bring him to Cousin Night, Kelvin.  He's the best dog friend of a cousin.

For this one, you need to know that Kelvin started to call Keefe his boyfriend, then chickened out and said "best...dude.. .friend of a cousin"






5.  Doubtful, but you never know.

Kelvin: Keefe is a good teacher.  He's done everything: oral, anal top, anal bottom...

BJ: Anything with...

Kelvin: 69, frottage, split roasting, intefemoral...

BJ: Anything with...

Keefe: Bondage, S&M, CBT, WS, Princeton Rub...

BJ: Anything with women?

Kelvin: Gross!  No, of course not!


6. Intermission

More after the break

The Nude Dude Review

 


Kelvin and Keefe at a gay resort sometime after Season 3, watching the Nude Dude Review.

Tropic Thunder



Nine inches and counting



Big Daddy

















First time on stage
More nude dudes after the break

Fire Island (2023): Myles Clohessy takes off his clothes, erases the LGBT people from a movie set in a gay resort.

  


I'm doing another trailer review, not because I want to see the movie -- the reviews were deplorably bad -- but because I want to demonstrate how deviously they erased the LGBT content.

Context: A 2022 movie, Fire Island, is a romantic comedy about guys looking for love (and sex) at the world-famous gay resort.   In 2023, a horror movie with the same title appeared, for audiences  that have no idea that the 2022 movie exists, or that Fire Island is a gay resort.

The blurb: "The perfect summer vacation quickly spirals out of control for a group of friends on the infamous, picturesque party getaway of Fire Island as they find themselves caught in a web of sex, lies and cold blooded murder."  Any idea that gay people exist here?

First, let's look at the Official Trailer:


Scene 1
: A man and a woman in bed together when they get a phone call.  They climb into the car with another man and woman.  Two heterosexual couples, right?  They shriek loudly with excitement.

Scene 2: Establishing shot of the Fire Island ferry, while sinister music plays.  We see an American flag and a Pride flag. What kinda flag is that, Mabel?  I never seen such a thing.  

Scene 3: They move into their house.  More sinister music.  Late at night, Man #2 says "I have to take care of myself.  This is the best way I can breathe.  This weekend is the last fucking thing I wanted to do, but..."  

Meanwhile, Woman #1 and #2 are kissing.  The wives are having a lesbian affair!

Cut to morning, with everyone dancing around the kitchen, overjoyed to be cooking breakfast.  Man #2 and Woman #2 hug and start to kiss.  Man #1 sits on the porch, talking to Woman #1.  I guess the lesbian affair is over.  They're all back to being heterosexual couples again.


Scene 4
: Uh-oh, the police find a dead guy (nice bulge in his underwear). Detective (Kresh Novakovic) thinks that it has something to do with the murders "out in the Pines."  That's where the two straight couples are staying!

Scene 5: Night.  Woman #2 awakens to an empty bed and calls for Man #2 (I assume, although the name she calls, Dan, is not in the cast list). Lights flash on and off.  

Cut to daytime. Man #2  and Woman #2 go into a house, yelling "Hello?  Hi?"

Now it's night again. Man #1 looks out the window at something scary.  I'll bet he's responsible for the murders.  

Scene 6: Old guy dressed as a hunter, in the woods, saying "Look at all this fucking b.s." or "these fucking deer." (I can't tell which: the dialogue is very soft, and the sinister music very, very loud.)  

Night again.  Man #2 and Woman #2 are in town. They see a figure in a deer mask.  They run on the beach, then into a house.  The detective, who is there for some reason, pulls a gun. Then it's morning, and they're running upstairs.

Scene 7: A split-second shot of a man and a woman dancing (wait...on pause, it's a butch/femme gay couple).  Cut to the femme one in the bathroom, with his throat slashed. 

Woman #1 wakes up in bed, wondering where Man #1 is.  He's on the beach, looking sinister.  Because he just killed a femme gay guy?  She gets up in her underwear and loads a gun.  The end.

Quick, how many of these people are gay?  Man #1 (played by Conor Paolo, top photo) is married to Woman #1.  Man #2 (played by Jonathan Bennett, second photo) is gay, and overcoming a recent tragedy.  Woman #2 is a lesbian, and in a relationship with someone who isn't on the car trip, so you'd think it was two heterosexual couples driving to Fire Island.  Plus her girlfriend looks like Woman #1, so you can't tell from the trailer that she exists.  You think the wives are having a lesbian affair. 




The Official Trailer tries very hard to make you believe that this movie is about two heterosexual couples at a resort that might have one or two gay people being eviscerated.  

But the Showtime Trailer goes even farther,  It cuts the Pride flag, the "I have to take care of myself," and the dancing/eviscerated gay guys, but adds three shots of men and women kissing.  

Left: Jared P-Smith, who plays the Bartender in a scene that doesn't appear in the trailer.

There are also three shots of a drag queen (played by writer/director Myles Clohessy's father) entertaining an audience of heterosexual couples. Each cuts directly to the deer mask person, implying that the drag queen, not Man #1, is the killer.  

The question is, why?  Why make a movie where 3 out of 5 protagonists are gay, then try very hard to hide it?  

Let's check Myles Clohessy.  He has 16 writing and 20 directing credits listed on the IMDB, but most are "upcoming."  Also 41 acting credits,  but only one gay role, in The Last Ferry.  He plays an ex-Marine who murders his boyfriend during a weekend in Fire Island.

 Interestingly, an interview in The Spirit, a local NYC newspaper, asks how he, a heterosexual, played a gay character.  He explains "I approached (the role) in the same way that I would approach any other character."   Actors used to be asked that all the time, but not in 2020.

But it may explain a lot about this movie.     

Nude photos of Myles Clohessy after the break