Complete Savages: In 2004, a sitcom about a dad and his five macho sons fails dramatically. With Ryan Pinkston, Jake's junk, and two nude Carradines

In September 2004, ABC added Complete Savages, about a single dad raising five "savage" sons, to its Friday night TGIF schedule, expecting a hit.  Star Keith Carradine belonged to a famous showbiz dynasty (see bottom photo), Erik von Detten was a well-known teen idol, and there were many famous guest stars, including Betty White, Shelley Long, and even President George W. Bush.  Yet the ratings were awful, and it was yanked after 15 episodes, with the remaining four burned off during the summer.

Maybe Savages  didn't do well because its lead-in was the third season of Eight Simple Rules, a nuclear family sitcom left in a precarious position after the death of John Ritter, who played the Dad.  Episode 3.1 got some buzz when son Rory (Martin Spanjers) showered with guest star Sam Horrigan, but after that viewers abandoned Rules for Joan of Arcadia on CBS, and it  ended up with a dismal rank of #90

Or maybe it was because of its similarity to Quintuplets, over on Fox: Andy Richter starred as the father of five kids, including dreamy short guy Ryan Pinkston (left) and Jake McDorman (right, nude photo after the break).

Maybe it was because Savages was produced and directed by Mel Gibson, whose homophobic, racist, and anti-semitic mania was just starting to limit his box office appeal.  

Left: Mel Gibson in 1985, when he was presenting as a leatherman and the source of gay rumors.

In 2004, I was at the age where you sometimes wanted to stay home on Friday nights, but felt guilty about it, so I may have dropped in an episode or two while "not feeling well" or "having a lot of work to do."  I think that Savages failed due to its astonishingly retro premise, an assertion that hegemonic masculinity is a biological imperative, so "all" boys are naturally violent, aggressive and posturing, into sports, cars, mechanical stuff, and especially girls.  

The savages cannily personified each of the characteristics of hegemonic masculinity.

Dad Nick (Keith Carradine, left): Big Wheel, be powerful, in charge, a leader.  He worked a firefighter, along with his younger brother Jimmy (Vincent Ventrescu, top photo).

More after the break. Caution: Explicit