Arian Cantaya appeared on my Instagram recommendations at a June 2026 powerlifting competition. He doesn't say, but it looks like a 110 pound clean and jerk.
The guy is really proud of his physique. What parent-managed account posts pictures in the bathtub?
He's got 800,000 followers on Instagram and 1.6 million on Tiktok, so he must be famous for something besides flexing.
Turns out that it's a Stella McCartney rainbow zip-up jacket. Stella celebrates LGBT designers, and has a line with trans models for Pride month, but she doesn't sell any clothes with Pride Flag motifs.
False alarm.
And taking dance lessons.
Especially dudes who dance with dudes.
Another false alarm -- Arian is dancing with a lady.
When Arian isn't flexing in his social media posts, he's hugging, holding hands with, and hanging out with girls. Either he's intensely girl-crazy, or his parents want us to think he is.
He has six acting credits, beginning with the short Un Pequeño Corte (2021): A girl faces "culturally imposed standards of beauty" and a Mean Boy (Arian, already evaluating the feminine).
Three episodes of The Gordita Chronicles (2022), featuring Emilia, a sassy immigrant gordita in 1980s Miami. She babysits Alvaro (Arian), an aspiring rap artist whose songs are about being hetero-horny:
Come and shake those bumpies
Juan Cardenas (left) plays her dad.
More after the break
The short Birdhouse (2023). A family arrives at an AirBNB full of scary birdhouses. Ricardo Herranz plays the dad.
Ten episodes of the telenovela Juego de Mentiras ("Game of Lies," 2023). César Ferrer (Arap Bethke) is the prime suspect in his wife's murder. But is she really dead? Arian plays Miguel. In the scene I watched after sitting through a lot of commercials, he asks an elderly nun if he can go play soccer. She agrees, so he runs off, and a young hunk starts to kiss her. Into religious cougars, dude?
A 2024 episode of Bad Monkey, with Vince Vaughn as a restaurant inspector-detective in Key West. Arian's character is not mentioned in the plot synopsis.
When Marge grows up, she names her son Richie after her lost love. Richie Tozier (played by Finn Wolfhard and Bill Hader) is straight in the original novel, of course (this is the not-gay-friendly Stephen King), but in the movies he has some unstated and probably unconscious romantic feelings for Eddie (Jack Dylan Grazer, James Ransone).
A few queer crumbs are not sufficient to detract from the intense girl-craziness of Rich Santos.
I hate shows with girl-crazy teens and especially preteens, probably because when I was a kid, I was told, over and over, "You don't understand now, but someday soon you'll discover girls in an jubilant Damascus Road epiphany. Boys will become mere buddies, helping you pursue the Girl of Your Dreams!"
"What if I never dream about girls?"
"You will soon. It's inevitable. No one escapes, ever."
When I became a teenager, parents, peers, teachers, and preachers started getting worried, and the interrogations began: "What girl do you like? What girl do you like? What girl? What girl? What girl?"
Whenever I see see a girl-crazy kid on tv, or in real life, so arrogant, self-assured, absolutely certain that they have found it, they know the meaning of life, I cringe, remembering a thousand interrogations.
I'll bet Arian never tells his friends that he has a girlfriend who lives in Canada, and never visits because she's very busy with her supermodel career, but he has to stay faithful and can't date other girls.
I'll bet he never asks out a cheerleader with large bazongas, knowing that she'll laugh in his face and he can be too "crushed" to consider dating another girl for at least a month.
I'll bet he never claims that he works out to impress girls.
Leonard Bernstein, Aaron the Rabbi's Son, and a poem about masks on the verge of coming out












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