A classic gay-subtext romance in "Godzilla v. Kong: The New Empire." Plus some penises, of course.

 

For Movie Night this week, we sawGodzilla v. Kong: The New Empire (2024).

I didn't actually understand what was going on most of the time:

 There was a Hollow Earth, which you can only get to through a space warp.

A Lost Civilization that predates anything on the surface, where people communicate through telepathy and use crystals to manipulate matter and antimatter.

A Chosen One.

A tribe of giant apes that live next to a volcano, and keep a giant glowing stegasaurus captive.  King Kong joins them, becomes their leader after fighting an evil dude, and adopts a baby ape.

Another giant stegasaurus, which fights King Kong in Egypt and takes out the Great Pyramid of Giza.

Nearby Cairo is an Orientalist myth instead of a modern city with skyscrapers and Starbucks.  

Is that a gay couple?

A giant glowing moth.

A fight between the two dinosaurs and two apes that takes out Rio de Janiero.

I guess you just have to say "Look!  Monsters fighting!"

Five people go to the Hollow Earth to check on Disturbances in the Force or something.

1. Mikael (Alex Fern, top photo), the driver of the transport vehicle, who gets eaten by a man-eating plant right away.  

2. Ilene Andrews, an expert on the Iwi Culture of Skull Island, where King Kong lived before he moved to the Hollow Earth.

3. Her adopted daughter Ji, the last of her tribe, who doesn't speak.

4. Tripper (Dan Stevens, left), a roguish, devil-may-care monster veterinarian.  

5. Conspiracy theory podcaster Bernie (Brian Tyree Henry).

When Tripper shows up, you assume he's going to be smooching with Ilene by fadeout.  That's what happens in 300,000 action adventure movies, right?  

Nope.  He mentions that they were friends in college, but gives no hint of a past or present relationship. Instead, he starts flirting with Podcaster Bernie, who is suspicious at first but warms up to him.

They hug.

More after the break

Wes Stern (sigh): Was the cutest teen idol of the 1970s gay, or just pretending? With bonus n*de Sal Mineo and Dustin Hoffman

 

Sigh.  Isn't this most groovy, ginchy, dreamy, outta sight dude to ever have his name written amid little hearts in a chemistry notebook?

Er...I mean he's a hot snack.

Wait -- not Bobby Sherman.  I meant his boyfriend, Wes Stern (sigh).

In the spring of 1971, 27-year old Bobby Sherman was probably the #1 teen idol in the country,or maybe #2 to David Cassidy of The Partridge Family.  He had released 10 albums and 23 singles, includiing hits "Easy Come Easy Go" and "Julie Do Ya Love Me."  His shirtless photos were plastered all over the teen magazines, actually more often than David Cassidy's.  And he had displayed acting talent as the "allergic to girls" beach movie star Frankie Catalina on an episode of The Monkees, plus two seasons as Troy Bolt on Here Come the Brides (1968-70).

The minds of ABC executives started churning.  Why not give him his own tv series?  He could play "himself," and sing a different number every week.  Surefire hit, right?

They based the premise on the singer/songwriter team Boyce and Hart.  Bobby would play Bobby Conway, a struggling singer. They just needed an awkward, "girl-shy" dude to provide the comic relief and tight jeans as his nerdish lyricist Lionel Poindexter.

Thousands of groovy dudes showed up for open auditions, but Bobby really, really liked 23-year old Wes Stern (sigh).  

Soon they were seen together at Hollywood hot spots, preparing for the deep, deep, deep romance (um...friendship) that would characterize their series.  

Everybody idolized Bobby Sherman at the time, but Wes (sigh) really pushed  up the lovelorn gaze.  He was definitely up for some snogging, and I'm sure that the nearly-openly bisexual Bobby Sherman obliged. 

Interestingly, Bobby married Pat Carnel that summer, and published an introduction to Wes (sigh) claiming that he "loves girls."  Protesting too much, buddy?

Left: Bobby hasn't revealed much about his male loves, but we almost know he dated almost-out actor Sal Mineo.

And Wes (sigh)

Tie-in novels and comic books were ordered, gushing teen magazine articles were written -- Wes (sigh) lives in a "bachelor apartment in West Hollywood.".  Then, after a "meet cute" episode of The Partridge Family, Getting Together premiered in October 1971. 

We must have watched -- the alternative was All in the Family, which Mom and Dad didn't allow because of the atheists.  But I don't recall anything except Bobby and Wes (sigh) smiling at each other.  My description comes from nostalgia articles:

In the first episode, Bobby becomes the guardian of his orphaned younger sister, but she runs away when she thinks her presence is interfering with their romance...um, I mean friendship. Don't they have their own room?  

Most episodes involved their parenting problems rather than the singing-song writing stuff - dig, a teenage girl in 1971 likes The Lawrence Welk Show!

Co-parents in an alternative family, plus the guys lived in an antique shop. They couldn't be more gay-coded if they plastered their bedroom with pictures of Steve Reeves.  

Except Getting Together didn't air on  ABC's Friday night block of kid-friendly programs.  It aired on Saturday night, where it failed to make a dent in the juggernaut of Archie, Edith, and the Meathead.  14 episodes appeared through January 1972, and then the duo disbanded.  But the memory of a gay romance has lingered.

Was Wes (sigh) gay in real life, did he and Bobby have a platonic-pal bromance, or was their relationship purely manufactured? I knew almost nothing about him then, and I still don't.  He is almost absent from the internet.  All I have is a few details about the show and 13 acting roles listed on the IMDB. 

He was born in New York City on July 25th, 1947.  "Stern" means "star" in German and Yiddish, so I'm assuming Jewish, although "Wesley" is a Methodist name.  No info on his education.  In 1969 he hit Hollywood and joined the Groundlings comedy troupe.

He turned down the role of Benjamin Braddock in The Graduate (1969) to star in The First Time (1969): Three teenage boys on vacation in Niagara Falls mistake Jacqueline Bisset for a hooker and set out to lose their virginity.  Wes (sigh) is into it, but his gay-coded friend is not.

More after the break

Corey B cooks with Leto, Harrelson, Cavalero, and his mystery boyfriend. With bonus Woody wood

Corey B (Bonalewicz) is a boxer, comedian, content creator, and social media influencer with 1.07 million followers on Youtube, 2.1 million on Instagram, and 8.3 on Facebook

His standup seems rather heteronormative: "It takes a woman an average of 15 minutes to have an orgasm, which means I've never made an orgasm.  You guys know what I'm talking about."  No, Corey, I don't.

"My wife thought I was cheating on her, because my Netflix account had a profile for Big Tidday Brenda.  So we looked through all the Brendas on my instagram followers, and they all had small tiddays."  I don't want to hear about tiddays, dude.

But he's most famous for Tik-Tok and Instagram videos where he prepares weird recipes with some buds:

Dorm room dinner with Benny Blanco

Oreo cake with Jared Leto

Brunch with Woody Harrelson

Holiday whiskey with Michael Bublé

Beetleljuice with Howie Mandel

Fruit by the foot penis with Tony Cavalero

Chicken skin dumplings with Chef André Rush

And a lot...a lot of stuff with his mystery boyfriend...

"This is the End": Celebrities are Left Behind, face cannibals, demons, gay sex, and Danny McBride

 I saw This is the End (2013) when it first appeared, and didn't really like it because (spoiler alert) it's about the Rapture.  When I was a kid, I was terrified of the Evangelical end-of-the-world event (not actually mentioned in the Bible) when everyone who is saved gets zapped up to heaven, and the unsaved are stuck on Earth. The preacher told horrifying stories of unsaved men waking up in the middle of the night to find their family gone, and gradually realizing that they are lost -- their sins can no longer be forgiven, so no matter how much they beg and cry, it's the Lake of Fire for all eternity.

But it stars some of my favorite actors, including two that I have a crush on, David Krumholtz (left) and Jay Baruchel (below), so I'll give it another shot.

Scene 1: LAX.  Seth Rogan picks up his buddy Jay Baruchel (bare butt, below), for the "best weekend ever" at his place, with his favorite things: Starburst, marijuana, and airheads. "I know you don't like LA, so I thought I'd lube it up a bit to ease the transition." "Much needed foreplay."  Discussing non-sexual things in sexual terms, har har.  Then: "I'm a well-known homosexual advocate."  I don't know what he means.  

Seth wants to go to James Franco's housewarming party, but Jay wants it to be just the two of them all weekend.  Awww... But they go.

Scene 2: At the house, Seth points out that Channing Tatum  lives nearby: "This is the sexiest street in America."  Jay chastises him for talking about Channing Tatum too much, but he counters: "I think he's attractive."  Ok, these guys are pretend-gay.

Franco: "This house is like a piece of me. You two stepped inside me." Seth: "You let us come inside you."  I'd better stop writing down all the gay-sex jokes, or I'll run out of space by Scene 3.

We meet various celebrities from the same general crew, having boring conversations. Jonah Hill appears to have an unrequited crush on Jay. Michael Cera (left) tries to kiss a guy. Later, Jay stumbles on him in the bathroom, getting blown and rimmed at the same time (by ladies). Craig sings for "all the ladies" to "take your panties off." 

Scene 3: Jay and Seth head to a convenience store for cigarettes.  Seth: "Is Michael Cera's butthole as cute as I pictured it?"  He's into guys' butts, har har.  Suddenly there's an explosion, and some of the customers rise through the ceiling in shafts of blue light!  

Outside, people are rising in shafts of blue light everywhere, driver-less cars are crashing, power lines are down...and back at Franco's house, everything is normal (only the good people went to heaven, so no celebrities, of course).  No one believes them.

Jonah says that Jay is "a sweetheart," implying that he's attracted to him, and everyone looks at him in disgust.  Wait -- you were all expressing homoerotic interest just a few seconds ago.

Scene 4: There's an earthquake, so everyone rushes outside -- and the whole city is in flames!   Then a giant sinkhole open, and almost everyone falls in.  Only Jay and Craig try to save their friends.  They survive, along with Franco, Jonah, and Seth. Before the tv dies, they get a few news reports -- martial law declared, Air Force One is down (The preacher told us that there had to be an unsaved pilot on every flight, in case of Rapture).

They start boarding up the house, inventorying supplies, and ineptly repairing the damage. Gay joke: Craig tries to move a giant ceramic dick: "That dick's coming now.  I got that big dick."

More after the break

Andrew Rannells and Adam Devine bromance? With bonus bulge, butt, and dick pics.

 

Looking for Adam Devine content, I came across a Reddit post stating that he and Andrew Rannells were bromantic partners.  Plus a 2015 interview in PopSuger proclaiming that they are "Your New Favorite Comedy Duo," 

First question: wasn't Adam already involved with Zac Efron?  How many men can a straight guy be in love with, and still identify as straight?

Second question: Andrew is gay, and has a boyfriend.  Can a straight guy and a gay guy have a bromance?  Regular platonic friendship, sure, but wouldn't an intense, passionate, physical relationship get weird?  Surely the "we might be having gay sex, har har" jokes would be ruined if one of the guys was really having gay sex. 

Third question: In what way were they a comedy duo?  The PopSugar interview was about them starring together in The Intern (2015), featuring Robert DeNiro as an oldster who becomes a "senior intern" at an online women's clothing company.  Andrew plays Cameron, the Vice President, who pitches the senior intern idea, and Adam plays Josh, an employee whom DeNiro helps with his (heterosexual) love life.  They don't interact.

They also appeared together in Why Him (2015), known as The Boyfriend in French.  Andrew plays Blaine Pederman, owner of an online greeting company (like greeting cards without the stamps), one of the guys hanging out with app billionaire and gay sex aficionado Tyson Modell (Adam); but they barely interact.  Tyson spends more time befriending Scotty Fleming, son of the focus character.

Extensive research has yielded no evidence that Adam and Andrew had an off-screen friendship.  I think it was just an advertising stunt that some Reddit-ers took seriously.

Oh, well, at least it gives me an excuse to post some nude pics of the guys. Adam first.  His penis is well-known.

And his butt.

Andrew after the break

Zac Efron's Hot/Hung Photos, Part 1: Nude Photos of Adam Devine's Bromantic Partner

Zac Efron is best known for High School Musical and his bromance with Adam Devine.  It's  platonic-ish, gay around the edges: Adam often discusses his erotic attraction to Zac, and brags about seeing his penis -- several times.  (Of course, almost everyone who sees Zac wants to sleep with him.) 

The bromance probably began, or at least became part of their public personas,  when the Workaholics guys did a cameo for Neighbors (2014), playing stoner frat guys from an earlier generation.  Zac and Seth Rogan, the stars of Neighbors, returned the favor: in a promo video for the Season 4 finale, they apply to become the guys' new cubicle mates. Zac gives Adam a lap dance and gets the job.

In Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates (2016), Adam and Zac play gay-subtext brothers who for some reason can't get girlfriends. Can't two of the hottest men on the planet just walk up to anyone they like and ask?   They eventually find some girls who will accept their quirks, but still, their non-fraternal love for each other shines through.  And off camera, after two years of trying, Adam finally got a chance to see Zac's penis.

And the rest of him.

Adam always distracts us from his jaw-dropping gorgeousity by making funny faces.  All Zac has to do is keep his shirt on.

Easier said than done.

Nude photos of Zac after the break.