Showing posts with label Northern Ireland. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Northern Ireland. Show all posts

"How to Get to Heaven from Belfast": Dark secrets, twisting plots, hunky guys, bulges, and d*cks. And the Irish countryside




Belfast has the reputation of being cold, dark, and grim.  Its main tourist attractions are the Peace Wall,  dedicated to the memory of the Troubles, and a museum showcasing the Titanic.  Not many people's idea of a proper craic, innit?  

But it has a thriving LGBTQ community, with bars, bath houses, a community center, and a lot of guys into hookups.

I heard that How to Get to Heaven from Belfast (2026), on Netflix, is a must-see, and I liked Lisa McGee's previous series, Derry Girls, so here we go with Episode 1, "The Wake" (a party held after the funeral, usually with a viewing of the body).

Prologue:  Night, with a view of the city.  Three people with flashlights find their way to isolated cabin, where a teenage girl is sitting in a pit.

Scene 1: 20 Years later: In Belfast, the highly butch Dara explains why she hates her mother in a very tight closeup, so tight that it is painful to watch.  The camera pulls away, and she is telling all this to the server at a coffee shop!

Meanwhile, Soccer Mom Robyn is driving while her two bratty preteens squabble in the back seat. She finds them so annoying that she bangs her head repeatedly against the steering wheel until it's bloody -- no, just a fantasy.


In London, Saoirse (pronounced Sheer-Shah), a writer for a hit tv show about a woman solving murders, is at lunch with two women and a man, who tell her that she should write stories with no murders. "But the name of the show is Murder Code!"  She finds the suggestion ridiculous, and storms off, bringing the man with her.  She wanted to be a playwright, but now she's writing crap.  If the man is actually her boyfriend, heterosexual identity established at Minute 7.

All three get emails from the sister-in-law of their friend Greta: she has died.  They decide to go to her village in Donegal County, Ireland. for the wake.

Scene 2: Butch Dara packs and gives her sister instructions on how to take care of their super-cranky mother.  She is picked up by Soccer Mom Robyn.  They get all weepy when Greta's favorite song plays on the radio: "Hot in Herre" (2002) by Nelly, whose name is a homophobic slur but is not actually homophobic.

While writer Saoirse flies in from London, she looks at photos of the Dead Friend and her boyfriend on her phone.  Heterosexual identity established at minute 10.  The flight attendant morphs into the girl in the pit,  probably Greta, and asks "Can I tell you a secret?"  They must have killed the guy who kidnapped Greta and put her in the pit.


Scene 3:
The two friends pick up Writer Saoirse at the Belfast Airport, and criticize her outfit. They discuss why they want to go to the wake: to assuage their guilt over not contacting their friend for 20 years, and to get a break from their current crises (hating their Mom, kids, and job, respectively).  Then on through the scenic countryside to Donegal (100 miles from Belfast, but in another country). 

Back story: Writer Saiorse is getting married, but not to the guy she had lunch with.  Her fiance is Seb (Tom Basden).  The other two are pushing their way into being bridesmaids.




Scene 4: Uh-oh, at a gas station, they put petrol instead of diesel in the tank, so they stall a few miles from their destination, Knockdara (fictional).  The Recovery Service guy, Liam (Darragh Hand), makes a joke about Belfast people being violent and dangerous, which doesn't sit well with two of them.  He flirts with Writer Saoirse.

The car needs its whole fuel system replaced, so Liam tows them into town, and the flirting continues.

Turns out that he knew their dead friend, Greta!  Her husband, Owen, is his boss!  Well, it's a small town.






Scene 5:
The flamboyant desk clerk at the hotel (maybe Owen Mallon) also knew Greta, and explains how she died: fell down a flight of stairs and broke her neck.

Instead of trying to walk the 2-3 miles to her house, he suggests they spend the night and set out the morning.  They could go to the 1990s-themed disco, "The Naughty Nineties."  It's so popular that teenagers bus in from Letterkenny (I didn't know that was a real place).

Scene 6: In the hotel room, Writer Saiorse checks Dead Friend Greta's Facebook page. It's been taken down.  This disturbs here.  

And Soccer Mom Robyn gets a phone call that consists of eerie static.

They all take showers (no lady parts).  We see a mysterious tattoo on their back, neck, and wrist.

Scene 7: At dinner, they discuss how "you can't go home again."  Time changes you.  The woman who died was not the girl they knew in high school; she was a stranger.

 Writer Saoirse goes outside to smoke and be depressed, and runs into Liam, now a member of the Garda.  He explains that he works for his uncle at the auto shop, and for their friend Greta's husband as a cop.  So, are you also the mayor and town veterinarian?  And the car is ready.

They gaze at each other for a long time.  I don't get it.  There were three women in the car.  How did he decide that he was only interested in Saoirse?  Is it recognizing your soul mate?  

He walks away, then returns to give her a slip of paper.  She thinks it's his phone number, but it's the bill for the car service, har har.

More after the break

James Stockdale: Disability advocate, solicitor, Caliban, gay guy who refused to make out with Dylan Llewellyn

 


I was interested in James Stockdale, the Caliban Boy from Wednesday (as well as the n*de dude on the poster behind him: a subtle sign that his character is gay?). He has no social media presence, but we can get a bio from some articles and interviews.  

He was born in 2002 in Dungannon, Northern Ireland, about an hour's drive west of Belfast.  While attending the Royal Schol Dungannon, he appeared in a number of plays at the Bardic Theater:  Joseph & His Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat, Wicked, Grease, and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.





James made his film film debut in A Christmas Star (2016) as the best friend of a girl who thinks she can perform Christmas magic (of course, she can).  It also stars Robert James-Collier. 

Next came Delicate Things (2017), alongside famous Northern Ireland actor CiarĂ¡n McMenamin as a man with a dead wife...yawn






Zoo
(2017) is not to be confused with We Bought a Zoo (2011), starring Matt Damon: during the bombing of Belfast in 1941, Tom (Art Parkinson), the Girl of His Dreams, and his "misfit friends" (including James) try to save a baby elephant at the zoo.  Stephen Hagen appears also.






Left: Stephen's d*ck.

Here's Looking at You, Kid (2018): Hubert (James) deals with tragedy by pretending to be a private detective.







James graduated from the Royal School Dungannon in 2020, and enrolled at Queens University in Belfast. He was nervous about living on his own: he has several disabilities, including dwarfism, a missing right hand, hip and foot deformities, and scoliosis, so daily living can be a challenge, but his experience at Queens was "brilliant."  They put him in the Elms Dorm for students with accessibility needs, and gave him a specially designed dorm room and bathroom, a parking pass, and a library aide. 

More after the break. Caution: Explicit.

Erin go Feirc: Nine Kilkenney cocks and Dublin dicks, plus a castle, a dolmen, and the Londonderry wall




I visited Ireland several years ago to research language education.  First stop: Glenstal Abbey School, near Limerick, about 2 hours southwest of Dublin.





The abbey entrance







Not one of the students









Kilkenny fun run









Not one of the runners










Gay couple in Dublin

Northern Ireland after the break