Gemstones Season 2 Finale: The Godfather, Butch and Sundance, random nude dudes, and "My love for you wil never die"

 

The series finales on The Righteous Gemstones are meant to tie up any remaining loose ends and say goodbye to the characters, so we should expect little or no plot development, just a lot of hugging: everyone who has had lost, frayed, or troubled relationships during the season, lovers, friends, parents and children, siblings, will be reconciled.

Hold on tight to the one you love the most:  A blackened stage. Suddenly a spotlight on Jesse.  He begins the country-western song "Some Broken Hearts Never Mend," by Don Williams.  Then Kelvin, lying on a platform, raising a finger to Heaven.  Then Judy and the choir, as she walks up stage.  Then all three siblings together. 

 Coffee black, cigarettes. Start the day like all the rest. 

First thing every moning that I do, is start missing you.

Some broken hearts never mend.  Some memories never end.  

Some tears will never dry.  My love for you will never die. 

Except this song is not about lost love, it's about mended hearts.  You're supposed to look at or point to a loved one. Kelvin starts out by pointing at audience stage left, obviously at Keefe, who points to himself and then back. My love for you will never die,

BJ waves, presumably at Judy.  Cut to Amber and the kids; then Baby Billy, Tiffany, and the baby; he looks back at Harmon, his no-longer estranged son; and finally Eli looks out at the audience. 

In the middle of love's embrace: Flashback to the Alaska Commercial Company, a grocery store chain with 33 locations in Alaska, mostly in rural areas. The Lissons, in hiding after their murders and attempts, are buying -- coffee to go?  Martin has them under surveillance

Left: random nude dude

Back in church, Eli looks at the band as the siblings sing the second verse together.  Then Jesse and Kelvin, looking up to heaven.

 Rendezvous in the night.

In the middle of love's embrace, I see your face

Wait -- they see God while their partners Amber and Keefe are going downtown?  Makes sense.

Cut to the Lissons in their cabin, watching Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, where the gay-subtext bank robbers, played by Robert Redford, top photo, and Paul Newman, left, are trapped, with no escape, so they go out shooting. 

 Some broken hearts never mend.  Some memories never end.

Some tears will never dry.  My love for you will never die.

The Cycle Ninjas:  Cycle Ninjas on glittering metallic snowmobiles zoom through the woods.  

Lyle looks out the window and yells "Get the guns!"

Back at the church, the siblings point at each other. Eli smiles. 

The First Chorus: The congregation rises to sing the chorus.

We see Chad and his wife, who have been having marital problems since Season 1; Martin and his often seen, never-named wife; Judy and BJ;  Junior and Tan Man, Baby Billy and Tiffany, Amber and the kids.  Then the siblings again.  Wait, I thought the Tan Man was just Junior's assistant.  Is there a gay relationship going on back in Memphis? 

In the flashback, the Lissons get out their guns and tell each other that God believes in them: "God will see us through, for we are the Chosen."  Where on Earth did Lyle get that idea?  

More broken hearts after the break

Workaholics Episode 1.10: Adam would suck a man's cock for $900. Does he take credit cards?

The opening sequence of Workaholics Episode 1.10 is widely condemned as homophobic, so let's take a look.

The setup: While driving to work, dudebros Adam (Adam Devine), Blake (Blake Andersoon), and Ders (Anders Holm) are having a random conversation.

Ders: "For $100,000, would you suck a man's penis?  That's a legitimate question.  A lot of hustlers (male prostitutes) are actually straight, but suck cocks as part of the job.  Their rates vary from $50 to $200. I'm not telling you how I know that.

Adam: A man's penis?  I don't know...  Why does he emphasize "man"?  Maybe he'd be fine with a trans woman who hadn't had bottom surgery? 

Blake: You get to pick the dude.

Adam: Final dick approval?   Choose any dick I want to?

Ders: Whoever's dick, except for me and Blake.  Darn, those would have been his first choice.  $100,000?

Adam: Ok then, yeah, totally.  

They talk him down from $100,000 to $50,000.  

For comparison, it would take way more than $100,000 for me to go down on a woman. Probably in the 2-3 million range.  If it involved secretions (I'm not clear on that), 10 million minimum.

Der: What about $5,000?

Adam: Yes!  I'd be thirty seconds away from getting a pretty sweet used motorcycle.  

Ders: It would take you way longer than that, Dude.

Adam: Are you kidding me?  Have you seen these lips?  Granted, you're one of the hottest guys on the planet, but I don't think your lips will get your man going.  You'll have to take off your clothes.  

He continues: Have you enjoyed the presence of me eating a kielbasa?  It's redonk!  Girls are like, "I'm impressed by that!"  So Adam fellates kielbasas?  I'd like to see that, too.

Blake: What is the absolute least amount of money you could get paid to blow a guy? 

Adam: We're talking if I'm honest with myself? I'd have to say $900. 

At that moment, they pull into the parking lot, and hit a man (who turns out to be their new boss).  They rush to see if he's ok, but continue the conversation:

Blake: Did you say $900?

Adam: No, I said $9,000.

Ders: I heard $900.

Adam: I said "thousand," Dude. I've got standards.  I'm not just blowing everybody. Grow up!  

Wait, what about having a dude go down on you, Adam?  How much money would you need?  No particular reason for asking.

In the office, the conversation changes: "How much to punch your mother in the face?"  

My analysis: How is this homophobic?  The guys are repulsed by the idea of giving a man a blow job themselves, but they never express any hatred, disgust, or even mild discomfort with men who enjoy doing it.  You don't have to like gay sex to be a gay ally.