OMG, some jaw-dropping queer codes on "Chad Powers." Russ and Danny are in love! With Zahn butt, Clayne cock, and random Tennessee dudes

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How fans deny queerness in "The Righteous Gemstones" and other tv series. With examples and dicks.

 

New book on fan reaction to queer codes in tv series, especially how and why some fans on social media refuse to admit that a character is gay.

Gideon Gemstone's room is plastered with pictures of musclemen.

He's obviously straight.  He wants to look like them, not at them.

On The Middle, Sue's friend Brad begins "I'm...."  and is cut off when she says "I know" and hugs him.  

Obviously he was going to confess his love for her.

On What We Do in the Shadows, Guillermo tells the vampires, "I was about thirteen when I realized that I was..." and is cut off.

Obviously he was going to say "shy around girls."

On The Hollow, Adam has a Pride flag in his room.

So what?  Lots of guys like rainbows.

He tells his friends, "I'm gay."

Obviously he didn't mean it like that.

Gideon and Scotty have a romantic candlelight dinner while the background song tells us: "The way you look when you get down, you knock me out."  

Straight guys can go out to dinner.  There's such a thing as friendship, you know.

More after the break.  Caution: Explicit.

Nude photos of Joaquin Phoenix: Skip the downer movies and check out his junk. With bonus Marky Mark and Kieran Culkin

 

Everyone in Wilton Manors saw Igby Goes Down in 2002: the trailer and the title made it sound like a gay coming-out story with a lot of "going down," har har.  Actually there's no gay content at all.  Igby is a sarcastic 17 year old with an institutionalized stepfather and a dying mother (first rule of fiction: somebody always must be dying or dead).  He hooks up with his biological father's "heroin-addicted trophy mistress" and her "terminally bored" friend before euthanizing his mom and getting the heck out of Dodge.

Imagine sitting in the theater expecting a lot of gay sex, and seeing...this.  We were so disgusted that we vowed to never see anything else that the actor appeared in.  20 years later, I didn't even remember his name.

Until I saw this nude photo from Edgerton (2025).  During the COVID pandemic, small-town sheriff Joe Cross disapproves of the mayor's mask edict, so he runs against him, then kills him and his Black-Lives-Matter son, and is eventually killed himself.  

I recognized him as the star of Igby, Joaquin Phoenix, still churning out downer movies.  

Joaquin Phoenix is straight, with several girlfriends and a kid.  And apparently homophobic; he was scheduled to play a gay guy who flees to Mexico with his boyfriend, but "got cold feet" and backed out five days before filming was to begin.

But he has a big cock, so instead of a profile, I'll check to see where he's shown it off 

Beau is Afraid (2023): One of those surreal indie films with a nonsensical plot.  A lot of people die, including Beau's mother, his father, a girl he is having sex with, and eventually Beau himself. We get a blurry dotado as he is being traumatized by something or other.  

Napoleon (2023): The butt of the Emperor of France, who made vassal states of practically every country in Europe. And since this was the Age of Colonialism, practically every country in the world.  When he wasn't having "energetic sex" with his wife and mistresses.

A butt crack (not shown) in The Master (2012): World War II vet has problems, joins a cult, drops out, has sex with women. 

A backside in The Yards (2000): A union organizer goes to work for the Mob, kills some people, buddies with Mark Wahlberg, has sex with girls.  Of course his girlfriend dies.  

Bonus: Mark Wahlberg's backside.

Igby-style chest in Return to Paradise (1998): A tourist in Malaysia is arrested for hashish possession and sentenced to death, unless his friends turn themselves in. Vince Vaughn agrees, but Joaquin is executed anyway.

There are lots of movies where people don't die, buddy. 

Wait -- what happened to Igby?  From 2000 to 2003, Joaquin starred in The Yards, Gladiator, Signs, It's All About Love, Quills, and Brother Bear, but no Igby Goes Down.

Turns out that Igby was played by Kieran Culkin.  A natural mistake -- the guys looked alike in their youth, and they both prefer roles in downer movies, with lots of sex with girls and people dying, often at the same time. 

And both have big cocks.

But Kieran's career is a little more gay-positive.  He played the sassy roommate in Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, and a human in love with Skyler Gisondo as a bat-alien on Solar Opposites.

See also:Solar Opposites Episode 4.9: Skyler Gisondo plays a muscular bat-alien with a human boyfriend, plus Thomas Middleditch penis

Richie Rich joins a gym. With bonus Rory and Kieran cocks, and Kelvin Gemstone Comics

Peter Billingsley: The lingerie lamp kid, a Beverly Hills brat, Whips, ropes, and perhaps Peter's peter

Solar Opposites Episode 4.9: Skyler Gisondo plays a muscular bat-alien with a human boyfriend, plus Thomas Middleditch penis

 

Solar Opposites is an animated sitcom about a family of sentient slugs that crash-landed on Earth and must look for a way home while adapting to bizarre human customs like gender polarization:  Korvo (Justin Roilland/Dan Stevens), the "man of the house," resistant to assimilation; Terry (Thomas Middleditch), the childcare expert, who eagerly adopts human culture;  Yumyulak (Sean Giambone), the teenage boy, a rebel who hates humans; and a teenage girl and pupa (infant).  

But this is a review of an episode where no one in the family appears except in flashbacks.  I'm including a beefcake photo of Sean Giambone (left) and frontals of Thomas Middleditch (below) anyway. 

Episode 4.9, "Down and Out on Planet X-Non," stars Glenn (Kieran Culkin), the family's snoopy neighbor, who got blasted into space.  He joined the SilverCops Space Force, but they framed him for murder.  He had to flee into the wilderness of an alien planet, fighting monsters and nearly dying many times.  And now his story continues in what seems to be the pilot for a spin-off.

Scene 1: After having an "expositional dream," Glenn awakens in a run-down office, naked.  Zy (Skyler Gisondo, top photo), a muscular being with a bat-head, found him in the wilderness, half-dead.  "What were you doing all alone in the woods?"

"I go there to jerk off," Glenn jokes.  "I got a thing for trees.  Why am I naked?"

"Your clothes were soaked with piss and shit." 

Zy infers that he has a "secred, fucked-up past," so he'll be perfect for their group of multi-species thieves and con-men.  

Glen tries to leave, but outside the door, beings are robbing and killing each other, so he decides to stay.  First queer code; Zy puts his hand on Glenn's shoulder and leaves it there.

Scene 2: The tour.  Most of the group has holograms on their chest, which means "they need extra help." 

"But I don't have a hologram on my chest," Glenn complains.

"I'm sure you have a hologram in your heart."  Awww..getting a little crush on this human, Zy?

Second queer code: Hand on shoulder again.  Third queer code: Again.  Gee, Zy can't keep his hands off Glenn.

Scene 3:  Interview with the group leader, Skeletom, a hippie dude with a glowing green skeleton.  He explains: "This place is for people who don't fit in."  Island of Misfit Toys, huh?  Queer code #3.  "No one else has our backs, so we have to be family to each other."

Scene 4: Glenn, Zy, a cat-being, and a Cthulhu-being on a scam run. Zy explains that the 'Raffs (sentient giraffes) took over and pushed the indigenous population into slums, using SilverCops to break heads:  "They claim they're keeping the peace, but they're racist as hell, and they play the natives against each other."  Cthulhu Lives Matter.  

Uh-oh, their last victim called the SilverCops.  Run!  Hiding in an alley, they discuss how much they hate the Sils.  And Glenn is one!  If they find out, he'll lose their friendship -- or worse.

More after the break

"Bad Ideas with Adam Devine": When you need to f*k the Sadness in a hurry. With bonus buddy bulges and butts

Sometimes you need to f*k the Sadness in a hurry, and your best bet is Adam Devine.  Not (just) because of his hotness, because his stuff is always upbeat, with no hatred, no tragedy, no angst, not a lot of heteronormative mishegas, just whimsical problems, humorous braggadoccio, and homoerotic bonds. 

But you don't have time for a whole movie, or an episode of  Workaholicsor   The Righteous Gemstones. What do you do?

The reality series Bad Ideas with Adam Devine, streaming on Roku, is a perfect solution. In each episode, Adam. "the world's greatest movie star, the world's greatest lover, the guy who clearly writes his own intros," teams up with one of his comedian buddies to do something dangerous:

1. Compete in the World's Hottest Pepper Eating Contest, in the Bahamas. With Thomas Middleditch from Solar Opposites

2. Compete in a demolition derby, the Night of Destruction, at Perris Auto Speedway, near Riverside, California. With Blake Anderson from Workaholics

Blake bulging as a cop-stripper

3. Become stunt performers in a Western movie (after seven minutes of training). With Rebel Wilson from Pitch Perfect

4. Drive an ice cream truck up highway P3 in Peru, called "the Death Road" for its hairpin turns and 1000 foot drops. With Anders Holm from Workaholics

More after the break

Did the "Solar Opposites Valentine's Day Special" really change everything?

 

Discussing the Solar Opposites Valentine's Day Special, showrunner Josh Bycel noted that holiday specials are usually stand-alone episodes, with no plot or character development: "So we love the idea of [this one] tricking people into realizing like, ‘Oh my God, the end of the episode is actually the biggest thing that’s ever happened to these characters short of landing on Earth!"

Co-creator Mike McMahon adds: "it really changes the dynamic of the characters."

Left: Mike McMahon.

Spoiler alert: Korvo and Terry, have sex.

Solar Opposites is an animated comedy about a group of aliens from the doomed planet Schlorp who crash-land on Earth: team leader Korvo, the "let's do this by the books" micro-manager; the effervescent goofball Terry; their teenage replicants Yumyulack and Jesse, and the Pupa.  Korvo and Terry find each other's habits annoying, and often argue about how assimilated they should become.

In the special, the group tries to order cold, wet tuna in a restaurant, only to discover that it's Valentine's Day, so only romantic dinners are available.  Should they come back tomorrow, or use their alien science to eliminate romantic love from the world?

They decide to eliminate romantic love.  But that turns everyone into Jimmy Buffet fans: they walk around in Hawaiian shirts, with parrots, drinking piña coladas.  Then the parrots become sentient and go to war with the humans.

To fix the mess, the aliens have to find a couple who still experience  romantic love, and use them to beam love down to the planet.  There are no humans in love left, but what about penguins?  Nope, they are pro-parrot, and refuse to help.

Terry asks: "Couldn't we love each other?"

No, all Schlorpians have is teammate affinity.  But maybe that will be enough.  They have to try.

Terry hates teammate affinity: "It's so annoying that I miss you uncontrollably when you leave the room."

Korvo agrees.  He hates "the way it makes the prickly bumps on my arms stand up when you bend over to pick something up from the floor."

Um..guys, that's erotic and romantic desire.....

They get it on.

Terry going down on Korvo

Anal.  Funny, Korvo was a bottom in an earlier episode.

More gay aliens after the break

"Solar Opposites": Do Korvo and Terry act like a married couple? Do they call each other 'husbands?' Do they have sex?

Solar Opposites (2020-) is a Hulu animated series about two aliens, their replicants, and their pupa,  who flee from their doomed planet and crash-land on Earth.  During Season 1, showrunner Justin Roiland addressed the question of whether male adults Korvo (Justin Roiland, Dan Stevens) and Terry (Thomas Middleditch, left) were a gay couple.  He said that since their species practices asexual reproduction, they don't have sex, and therefore they can't be gay.  Jerk, thinking that being gay is purely about sex.  What about romantic partnerships? 

Apparently he changed his mind.  The fan wiki states that Korvo and Terry became a romantic couple between Seasons 1 and 2.  But how romantic are they?  Do they say anything?  Do anything?  Or do you have to just infer from gay subtexts? To check, I reviewed some episodes, either because the premise sounded interesting or because there was a hot guest star.

Episode 2.1: The Solar Opposites discover another refugee group from their home planet, living in London!  But it turns out that they have a disturbing hidden agenda.  No indication that Korvo and Terry are romantic partners.  With the voice of Thomas Lennon, the grotesque gay-stereotype cop in Reno 911 (left: his butt)

Episode 2.2: Korvo hates dinner parties, so he declares them illegal and starts a police force to seek out forbidden dinner party paraphernalia.  Things turn deadly: people are turned into wine.  During the denouement, Korvo and Terry kiss.

Episode 2,3: Yumyulack, the "teenage boy" replicant, invents a ray that gives him a huge penis -- not for sex, for the power that goes with it.  He makes it bigger and bigger, until it threatens to destroy the world.  No indication that Korvo and Terry are a romantic couple.

Episode 3.2  Korvo wants to take up a hobby, but everything he tries, Terry is already doing, and doing better.  In frustration, he goes into a toy train shop.  The manager thinks that he's just pretending to be interested in trains to beat his "alien husband."

Episode 3.3 Terry shows Korvo the joy of standing in line, and introduces him to his "line husband," Linus (Adam Pally).  Line husband and regular husband jealously snipe at each other, until Korvo finally wins Terry's heart. (Left: Dan Stevens' butt)

Alien bulge and dick after the break