Thursday, March 21, 2024

"The Fosters": Twelve hunks and hunkoids, all grown up. With a few grown-up dicks


The Fosters 
(2013-2018) was a groundbreaking drama on ABC Family, now on Netflix, about a lesbian couple (Stef and Lena) with five children, biological, adopted, and foster (Brandon, Jesus, Jude, Callie, Mariana). The Fosters have foster children, har har 

But it wasn't all sunlight and diversity. Actually, it wasn't sunlight at all. I never watched -- I don't do tragedy -- but the episode synopses sound grim. There were drinking problems, psychological problems, incurable diseases, deaths, homophobic hate crimes, custody battles...like a live-action Howard Cruse comic.   But for many viewers, the remarkably open gay content was worth being depressed.

Besides, there are endless teenage boys with their shirts off to draw in the gay boys and straight girls. I'm checking to see if there were any adult hunks in the crowd, or if any of Fosters Fave Raves have grown up.


1. David Lambert:  Brandon, the oldest son in the family. an aspiring pianist whose dreams are dashed when an injury paralyzes his hand.  He also becomes the victim of statutory rape by hooking up with his father's girlfriend.






The adult Lambert shows his butt while sexing a girl in The Lifeguard.






2. Danny Nucci: Mike, Brandon's biological father, a cop who has a drinking problem, shot an unarmed suspect, and has a girlfriend who hooks up with Brandon.











Nucci butt

3. Tom Williamson: AJ, Mike's foster son.  When does Mike find the time to be a foster parent?

4. Jake T. Austin: Jesus, the second son, who has Attention-Deficit Disorder.





5. Brandon Quinn: Gabe, Jesus' biological father, who didn't tell Jesus because he didn't want the boy to know he's a registered sex offender.

6. Hadyn Byerly: Jude, the youngest son, who becomes mute in angst over coming out as gay (with lesbian parents?), but eventually learns to accept himself and starts dating, with probably the youngest same-sex kiss on television.







More bulges and bods after the break.  Warning: explicit.


7. Gavin McIntosh (top photo): Connor, Jude's boyfriend, who has a homophobic father.

8. Tanner Buchanan (left): Jack, a shy boy with lots of angsty problems who Jude befriends.













9. Louis Hunter: Nick Stratos, the boyfriend of one of the girls, who set fire to his dad's warehouse, brought a gun to school and threatened to shoot everyone, and later threatened to shoot himself in front of her.

10. Kerr Smith: Robert, Callie's biological father, who wants custody.








11. Tom Phelan: Cole, a trans boy who was kicked out of the house when he told his parents. He was placed in a girls' foster home, where he got into a fight with another girl and had a seizure from illegal hormones. 

Tom Phelan, who is trans in real life, played the first trans teen on television.  This may be the other Tom Phelan listed on the IMDB>





12. Jordan Rodrigues: Mat, the boyfriend of daughter Mariana.  He doesn't have any angsty problems so she dumps him.

Honorable mention: Noah Centineo, who took over for Jesus after Jake T. Austin left.










Centineo dick.





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