Monday, March 25, 2024

Joel Rush: Why does everybody else in his movies get naked?

 


It's difficult to research Joel Rush: no instagram or personal website, only a minimal Facebook page, a Twitter page that hasn't been updated since 2012, a wikipedia page that just tells us that he was born in Logansport, Indiana on August 26, 1981, worked as a software salesman in Tampa, did some modeling, and broke into acting after being runner-up on the reality show True Beauty in 2009.  

He's been in several gay-themed movies, including Eating Out: Drama Camp, Eating Out: The Open Weekend, and Love or Whatever, but I can't tell if he's gay in real life. True Beauty judged your inner beauty; it didn't hook you up with a romantic partner.



I noticed something else unusual about Joel: he's been in a number of movies and tv shows where other guys got naked, but he did not.

In Eating Out: Drama Camp, we see Aaron Milo's cock and Ronnie Krell's butt, but Joel just takes his shirt off.








In Eating Out: Open Weekend, we see Michael Vera's butt and Alvaro Orlando's dick, but no Joel.










In Love or Whatever, Corey, played by Tyler Poelle, is distraught when his boyfriend John, played by David Page, dumps him.  They get naked, but new romance Joel Rush does not.









We do get a butt  in the anthology series Femme Fatales, but Jon Fleming gives us the Full Monte.









More Joel after the break

Sunday, March 24, 2024

Kelvin/Keefe Memes: date night, penises, coworkers, and more penises. Even my grandmother knows.



This is a series of memes -- jokes -- featuring Kelvin and Keefe of The Righteous Gemstones, and friends.  Most don't require you to have any background knowledge of the show.


1.  How to say that you're hung without saying that you're hung

BJ: I can swallow a lot, but this might be something I just can't choke down.

Keefe: You just need a little practice. Try this. Kelvin used it to prepare for our first date.



2. BJ and Keefe go to church

BJ: Praise Jesus!  Testify!  I got the Spirit of God in me!

Keefe: When will this be over so Kelvin and I can go home and make out?





3. The honeymoon


Kelvin: You want to go sightseeing?  But Keefe, this is only the fifth day of our honeymoon.  The Eiffel Tower can wait.













4. A nude guy to balance out the jokes.



5. The Men's Room

Keefe: During my Satanist days, I spent a lot of time in the men's room of that truck stop off Highway17. Want to give it a try?

Kelvin: You always have the best ideas for Date Night.


More memes after the break

"The Strongest Man in History": Robert Oberst and his pals recreate Viking challenges. With bonus Danish dick

  


In The Strongest Man in History, on the History Channel, four contemporary strongmen try to recreate the stunts of legendary strongmen:

William Bankier, who lifed a piano in Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show.

Thomas Topham, who lifted three barrels of water weighing over 5,000 pounds in 1749.

Monte Saldo, who lifted a motorcar and five passengers in 1903 



The guys: 
1. Brian Shaw, "Shaw Strength"
2. Eddie Hall, "The Beast"
3. Robert Oberst, "Strong and Pretty"
4. Nick Best

I watched the first episode, where Nick takes the guys on a tour of Moorhead, Minnesota, across border from Fargo, North Dakota, the "center of Viking culture in the United States."

 Nick is a devotee of all things Viking, even going to Renaissance fairs wearing a horned helmet.  His signature stunt is the Viking Press.

They visit the stave church at the Hjelmkomst Center, go ice fishing, and hear about how the days of the week are named after Norse gods.  But for some reason they skip the biggest tourist attraction in Moorhead, the Hjelmkomst Viking Ship.  It's a replica built by Robert Asp in the 70s that sailed across the ocean to Norway before being housed in the Clay County Cultural Center

Most of the episode is devoted to the guys introducing themselves, explaining what they're going to do, discussing how difficult it will be, and then doing it:


1. Carry a 345-pound boulder. All Viking boys had to carry one to achieve fullsterkur, full strength, and be considered a man.  In Iceland, they still use the 409-pound Húsafell Stone as a test of strength.

Left: 18 year old Billy Crawford, the youngest person ever to lift the stone.



2. Thow a 13-pound hammer, with an ice bath penalty for the guy with the shortest distance. Nick loses, at 70 feet. 

3. Pull a 12,000 pound Viking ship.

4. Hoist a 1,433 pound mast. 

Some of the challenges in other episodes are interesting.  In Stoke-on-Trent, Eddie Hall's home town, they named an oat cake, sort of a savory stuffed pancake, after him.  It has six sausages and three pounds of cheese.  The challenge: whoever finishes first without throwing up wins.

In the last scene, the guys gift Nick with an authentic Viking-era axe, leading to a group hug and: "So, we all going to get on the bed and start making out?"  They jump on the bed, but we cut before the make-out session.

Beefcake: The guys are fully clothed most of the time.

History: Snippets.

Gay Subtexts: Deliberate.  An extraordinary amount of buddy-bonding, with the guys often discussing how attractive they find each other.

Reality TV: The breathless "It's 12,000 pounds!!!!" and the constant repetition become annoying.  I might watch this on the treadmill at the gym, but for regular viewing, it's too darn fluffy.

Bonus Danish dick and other Scandinavian guys after the break.  Warning: Explicit.