Sunday, April 14, 2024

Gemstones Episode 3.6: BJ swallows a lot, Keefe learns about hard wood, and Kelvin gets a girlfriend. With nude boxer bonus


In the last episode (before the interlude), we saw the family shattered, with Judy/BJ and Kelvin/Keefe breaking up and the Montgomery boys plotting against Eli.  Now we're going to see life amid the ruins.

Title: "For Out of the Heart Come Evil Thoughts." Matthew 15:19: "For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies." We don't need to match the Gemstone with the sin: they are all guilty of false witness, lying to others or to themselves.

How to Make Things Right: BJ didn't move out, after all,  but the two are barely speaking. Judy asks what she can do to make things right. He doesn't know.  She is despondent. Remember that in 2000, she worried that she would never find anyone who would love her.  It took 18 years, but she finally found someone, and now it's over.

Gay joke: "I swallow a lot, but this may be something I can't choke down."  You just need a little practice.  Ask Keefe for some pointers. 


The Montgomery Boys Leave
:  At Eli's mansion, the Montgomerys thank the family for "straightening them out."   Kelvin suggests that it happened "when we dressed them up."  That sounds like a gay reference.  

Jesse says "They're ready to fuck": their next steps should be girlfriends,  intercourse, wives and kids, the whole heterosexual trajectory.  To start them out, he gives them his monster truck, the Redeemer.

 As they drive away, Kelvin takes off his "wedding ring."  If he leaves it off, the relationship will really be over.  He'll be single again.  He puts it back on.  But maybe he is thinking of a heterosexual trajectory of his own. 

Taryn is Back: We cut to Kelvin introducing Taryn, who we last saw at Keefe's "wieners and ice cream" party, as his new assistant youth pastor.  A kid asks about Keefe, and he gets all bitchy: "He is leaving to pursue other opportunities.  Not even sure why you keep bringing that up!" -- while fiddling with his wedding ring again.  He continues to fiddle -- and look despondent -- as Taryn leads the kids in a dance. 

Paying off the Scandal:  The siblings meet with Stephen, his wife, and their lawyer.  They want $500,000 for "damages and emotional distress," or the affair goes viral.  So it's like the blackmail over Jesse's sex-and-drugs party in Season 1, but this time there's no tape.  Judy could just deny that anything happened.  She could even sue him for slander.

Martin suggests paying the money, along with an apology.  Kelvin must be wondering: if it's worth $500,000 to keep an extramarital affair under wraps, how much damage would he cause the church by coming out  -- or being outed.  He doesn't like Taryn in that way -- he doesn't like women in that way -- but what choice does he have?  

After scenes where Baby Billy and Jesse discuss the hologram Aimee-Leigh idea, and BJ stalks Stephen, Kelvin tries to find out if the relationship is really over.


The First Reconciliation Attempt: 
We find Keefe working at Woodpecker's Carpentry.  Wood-pecker, har har, the first of many phallic references in this scene.  His earring, necklaces, and rings are gone -- for safety, or to keep closeted?  

Suddenly Kelvin appears. Looking around nervously, Keefe asks "Brother Kelvin, what are you doing here?" Note that he uses formal titles to reaffirm that they have broken up: they are just pastor and parishioner.  No doubt he's worried that Kelvin will out him by referencing their relationship or just being flamboyant.  Kelvin does try his usual titty-tweak, but Keefe doesn't respond.  You're broken up!  You're not allowed to take liberties anymore!

Gay joke: "Master Bishop has taught me a lot in the ways of hard wood." Tell me more about your...um...hard wood.  The odd title "Master," not used for master carpeters, led some fans to speculate that he and Keefer were involved in a BDSM relationship. 

 Wait -- how long has he worked there?  Surely it's only been a few days since the breakup.

Kelvin asks "Have you found happiness?" An odd question. Why not just ask if he likes his new job.?  Keefe says that he has, but of course he's lying.  He's busy working on a reconciliation rocking chair.  He uses the  punching gesture that straight guys sometimes use to ward off physical contact: a bro-hug would be too painful.

Apparently Kelvin expected Keefe to be crying and miserable, lost without him, like in the Season 1 breakup.  Seeing that his ex is doing ok, he becomes bitchy, denigrating the carpentry job and declaring that he's having lots of fun with Taryn: "everybody loves her...no one misses you at all." The happiness facade fails: Keefe frowns and orders him to leave. 

We cut to Judy asking Eli for the bribe money. He exclaims "Can't you children figure out your lives?" and refuses.  

Then the Montgomery Boys zoom the Redeemer into Peter's new militia compound, claiming that they stole it.  But in Episode 2, he sent goons to kill them.  When did they start working for him again?


Don't Mention Cum
: BJ bursts into tears while working at his Church Welcome Center job. Jesse and his crew sympathize: Stephen has cuckolded him, taken away his power.  He needs to fight the guy, "knock his dick in the dirt, show him who is the man."  

They take him down to the basement for punching-bag training.

Top photo: Michael O'Hearn works out with boxer Paulo Costa. 

Left: Punching bag

Crash! BJ complains that he broke his wrist on the punching bag.  "It was limp already," Jesse says: his first homophobic slur ever, again suggesting that Kelvin will have trouble coming out.  The family certainly knows, but they do not want the whole church to know. 

As BJ practices his trash-talk, Jesse tells him to: "Stay focused, don't talk about cum, and show him who the fuck you are."  Good advice for a first date.


More advice and boxers after the break

Shane Michael Parker: Soldier, stunt cock, wolf fan, gay BDSM performer?


Shane Michael Parker was "proudly born" in 1994, grew up in Ohio, spent time overseas in the military, and moved to South Carolina in 2016, at the age of 22, to pursue an acting career. Why, was Los Angeles full? 

As Shane Miclette, he worked as a production assistant on the horror movies Separation and Scream (2022).  He filmed an appearance as Matthew in the second season of Outer Banks (2021) but his scene was cut.

As Shane Michael Parker, he played a Confederate soldier in Lessons from Ebenezer Creek, (2021), about a massacre of recently enslaved African Americans in North Carolina in 1864.

His most impressive role to date is in  Righteous Gemstones Episode 2.1, a flashback to 1968, when Young Eli, the Maniac Kid, bests his opponent in a huge wrestling arena, then goes back to the locker room to talk to his manager, Glendon Marsh.   

A muscular naked guy walks from the showers across the scene. Glendon says   "Nice cock, Ernie."

There is no "Ernie" in the cast list. Either Glendon is talking about someone off-stage, or the naked guy's name was changed to Jason, played by Shane.

Glendon's son Junior gawks at Jason's dick, so overwhelmed that he trips, then catches himself and turns to peek at his bare butt.  

The gay/bi coding continues when the elderly Junior shows up in Charleston to reunite with his old friend or boyfriend Eli.


Of course, I wanted to learn more about this guy whose dick is so instrumental in establishing the gay-subtext Eli-Junior friendship in Season 2.

Shane doesn't have much of an online presence,  so I haven't found out much about him except that he has one or two kids, both girls, and he lives in a small town about two hours from Charleston.   





There are some photos online of Shane with a wife or girlfriend, and on a visit to Wolf Country USA in Palmer, Alaska, which closed in 2011 after the owner was fined for owning and selling wolf hybrids. So Shane was about 16?

Shane himself was arrested in November 2022 for telephone harassment: "repeatedly contacting and threatening the victim by phone."  He also had a felony fugitive warrant from Ohio.So maybe the name change has to do with the fugitive warrant?   

A search for nude photos on dating sites yields only a blurry butt pic.  And this:

Naked Shane, probably, after the break

Saturday, April 13, 2024

The homoerotic hijinks of Skyler Gisondo's crew, with at least four gay and three nude dudes




Skyler Gisondo was born in Florida and grew up in California.  He was home schooled for several years to give him free time for acting; then he attended Milken Community School, a Jewish high school, graduating in 2014.  He was deeply involved in Jewish activities, including Temple Beth Am (Conservative Judaism), USY (United Synagogue Youth) and Camp Alonim.  In 2015 he began attending the University of Southern California, a semester at a time to make room for Santa Clarita Diet.


In high school and college, Skyler found some hunky friends who enjoyed homoerotic horseplay.  Some have remained part of his crew to this day.  


1. Top photo: Joshua Tree.  Skyler is the one pretending to be a top.

2. His friend Ben in Israel.






3. Skyler and his roommates.  What happens in the apartment, stays in the apartment.







4. In Costa Rica.








5. Skyler is the one attached to a guy instead of a girl.








More after the break